Washing dishes

Sukie hit the nail so precisely on the head that I suspect she is the Sukie I went to school with. If so, no surprise we are in total agreement here.

What do you do in the kitchen after dinner? If you are not in there, I cannot see how unwashed dishes can upset you so much.

If you are in there, buy a screen and put it up after dinner so you can't see the washing-up.

So many nasty comments following a simple question of ‘AIBU’. We have an arrangement where whoever cooks dinner, does the clearing up. I do most of the cooking, as I enjoy it, and we do have a dishwasher. You’re not being unreasonable in my opinion Sheian62, but I’d definitely recommend that you get a dishwasher, much more environmentally friendly than washing-up by hand. 😊

I haven’t seen nasty comments just honest ones that don’t agree with original poster 😵‍💫

I find it sad when someone wants to share a genuine worry for them, that others say she is lucky to have a husband, and one who is willing to share some chores. Not just on this thread.

We all have our worries, and they are different for different people. Some answers have given useful pointers which may help the OP, not beat her with a stick.

I’ll rephrase that BlueBelle, not ‘nasty’, but unnecessary.
Yes, Cabbie21, my thoughts exactly.

I can see your point. You would like to sit down for the evening with a tidy kitchen. My husband and I argued for years about this. I got so annoyed about having to do it myself. But I know now it wasn't important. Now he wants them done early and I couldn't care less 😁. We muddle through it in the course of the evening, depending on who feels like doing them.
It's not worth worrying about. However if you can manage to fit a dishwasher in I would do it, never mind what OH thinks.

I agree , there are some unnecessary condescending comments . No need .

Thanks for all the views. It could be time to change the system, I.e. see if he would prefer to cook and I will clear away. Compromise will be discussed. I don’t want to argue or fall out or be unreasonable. If necessary I will wash up immediately after eating to show him my preferred wish and see if he accepts this or not. It’s my pet hate which is something going back to childhood and what was expected in my family home, so part of my DNA.

Cabbie21

I find it sad when someone wants to share a genuine worry for them, that others say she is lucky to have a husband, and one who is willing to share some chores. Not just on this thread.

We all have our worries, and they are different for different people. Some answers have given useful pointers which may help the OP, not beat her with a stick.

Yes, I agree with you. I once met a lady who was divorced but very bitter and when I mentioned that I had had no sleep as hubby was snoring, she said I was very lucky to have a husband to keep me awake snoring. Still, didn't help the fact that I was tired. I thought about it and thought she was rather self righteous. As you say, different worries for different people.