Being invited to an acquaintance’s house for a meal

Please just go and then don't forget to update us all.

I am also wondering about safety

Op does not know the person that well, it is safer to meet in public, rather than a private home.

You probably have to go now that it's arranged, or amend it to a cafe if you can.
Don't be harsh with yourself ( or your acquaintance), but be prepared to refuse requests/demands for future meals or things she might want you to go and help with.
Maybe you can slip into the conversation before she can ask for help/more get-togethers that you're finding it very hard to fit in everything you want to do and meet up with long-term friends/family and have realised you have to cut back on some things.
Compassionate, kind, but firm is possibly what's needed. Might be worth researching info around where she lives to have some suggestions for other activities she can get involved in if she's lonely.
I can get roped into things then find it's hard to pull back! Be realistic about what you could or want to offer in the way of time/friendship and think about your own wellbeing too.

I find an invite for a meal somehow demands a return invite, that's the problem.

I do love going out for meals but seldom enjoy cooking for others as the family visit/stay a lot - so it's just more of the same for me. I tend to ask people out for a meal instead - or get a takeaway.

Mrsemmapeel10, I think you have a negative mindset on this, though. I welcome chats with people I have 'little in common' with. I'm curious, interested in why they hold their views - and it's fine to disagree.

Just to give you an update on what happened. The meal was soup so it was not a long drawn-out affair. I used many of the helpful comments on here to prepare my replies for various scenarios and indeed she did make 3 specific requests of me that I was able to deflect. I also made helpful suggestions as to how she could achieve her requirements by other means which didn’t involve me. The evening ended by her saying that she would contact me for the occasional coffee. This I could cope with, although I’m not sure how much we will have to talk about as we have exhausted the conversation about people we used to work with, and have brought each other up to date on our lives. Thank you again for your helpful suggestions.

Glad it is over!

Well EmmaPeel at least the meal wasn't of the fancy kind!
What a relief!

I'm glad it is behind you now - coffee is manageable now and then.

Lots of us do something once (or agree to when "caught out") and no-one should feel bad if they are pressured (because they are kind people) into things that are truly dull.

I think many of us have got stuck helping people who are actually perfectly capable of helping themselves.
I'm sure she will be fine. And you have offered her suggestions for alternative support so that's good.

I think some people on this thread have been unnecessarily sharp.
Maybe they have never been (or seen loved ones) "stuck" in a cycle of helping.

Just as a side line. I went yesterday for tea and cake with a lady I don't particularly like because I could not back out. Suffice to say the whole situation has triggered an IBS attack as I had a horrid time, she was sooo negative. Sometimes you just need to walk away.

I have a pal from way back, who constantly rings me with tales of her romantic conquests - she is lovely and will give you the shirt off her back -but I have decided to keep in contact via text - so much easier😂