A nearby house was used as an air b&b. The immediate neighbours were watching TV one evening when they became aware of movement outside. 4 pairs of eyes were observing them through the window! Obviously in some cultures (they were from China) this is acceptable!
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AIBU
A little whinge
(116 Posts)I got on a bus yesterday and a woman with a shopping trolley sat next to me. I know there are more important things in the world than this, but this annoys me. The bus was practically empty, so why sit next to me. She could have gone to the wheelchair bit with her trolley, it was empty with a seat nearby. If that seat was the only one available, then fair enough. Do others have petty grievances?
I didn't know that about Sweden but it could explain a few things. There are quite a few Swedish people living in this town and I will see if I notice any characteristics.
They can be forthright and would never say yes out of politeness. 
we once camped overnight in Sweden and nobody talked to us even to the extent that nobody told me I was washing up the dishes in the place reserved for washing out the chemical toilets....
I did think it smelled a bit funny.
When I came across the proper place, it was like something out of a design magazine.
good subject thread overthehill see all the different opinions!
I would have wondered why she chose to sit there.
but, a few years ago I was going on a short break holiday and getting on the coach head down looking for my seat number, found it and sat down next to a lady who was 'with' the couple in front so they were quietly nattering back and forth. when we stopped at the services then returned to the coach I saw what the problem was..........all the seats behind me were vacant! why didnt they point this out to me... ha ha I did feel a fool.. but my head was down looking for my given seat number.
Maybe, LRavenscroft they have similar rights in Germany to Sweden?
I find it strange that family in Sweden find it perfectly acceptable to wander about on other-peoples land and in their gardens.
We were taken out to someone's garden to "have a look"! It was an odd feeling. They parked in their drive too! 
An English friend who lived most of her life in France, near to beautiful deserted beaches, told me that it was a 'thing' for families to settle down next to the only available people. Ten minutes later a large family arrived, spread out next to us, (the rest of the beach was deserted) and the peace of the afternoon was ruined by noisy arguments, children throwing toys about, vigorous shaking of wet towels and swimming gear and constant walking up and down scattering sand over us. We didn't move, attempted conversation, but I really couldn't understand their desire to be so close.
It makes no difference what make of car but so many times I park in an empty area only to return to another car parked too close to the drivers door beside me. I do wonder at this mindset.
Our kitchen is large enough too Baggs but DH still takes up too much space around me. 😄
I know how much you enjoy a blether Grammaretto. A silent table isn’t somewhere you should be sitting. 😂
Blethering is a popular pastime here in Glasgow and part of a day out if you are in a chatty mood or lonely.
I'd like a little whinge about the word hubs.
SpringyChicken
Perhaps you smelled nice, overthehill.
Well I hope so. It's not just me then. I don't want to share a table in eating places either. My hubs calls it the herding instinct.
We have some benches here that are for ‘anyone who wants to chat’ as it’s winter not anyone much out sitting on benches but I ll tell you how it goes in the summer
I think that a lovely idea too much loneliness in the world
Perhaps you smelled nice, overthehill. 
I'll be coming through to Glasgow for the Meetup this week Baggs to get that great vibe again!
In our local arts cafe there is one table which is longer than others where anyone can sit and start chatting.
I spent a weekend at the Buddhist centre at Samye Ling. I didn't notice the sign saying silent table until well into the communal meal

Baggs, my husband is the same doesn’t matter which part of the kitchen I’m in he’ll need something out of a drawer or cupboard where I am 😉
I went to a local church for Sunday service, went to sit on a pew at the back as I was one of the last in and got told “you can’t sit there that’s so and so’s” that pew remained empty for the whole service. I didn’t go back…
Yes Grammaratto I have made friends for life just by starting a brief chat My best friend talked to a lady sitting next to her on the bus and now for the last five years they ve been going on coach trips together
A few weeks ago a very mentally ill gentleman who I always have a chat with when I see him put his hand on his heart and said thank you for talking to me like I m human now if that doesn’t bring tears to your eyes what does?
I like the Portuguese dining table thing yogitree
Grammaretto
That's right BlueBelle but it can be subtle. This is why we always mention the weather first before we launch into problem teenagers, cost of living, lack of shops or anything controversial.
When I arrived in Edinburgh as a young mum who knew nobody, I would speak to total strangers. One day a near neighbour asked me if I was very lonely!
Not a problem in Glasgow, Gramm! 😀
Nor in North Lancs where I hail from.
I've lived in Edinburgh and was very happy there when my kids were small. I think it's only the posh parts that can be a bit snotty. That said, I once sat on a kerb in St Andrews Square waiting for a bus. I was heavily pregnant and tired of standing. Some asked me if I was okay, which was kind of them.
Oh, yes Grammaretto I can relate to this at a Yoga class. 😂
Is it a female ‘quirk’ do you think, just enjoying personal space at times? It was only recently that it was necessary to keep 2 metres apart. I think this has had an impact, particularly with older people. I’m sure it doesn’t imply that we are standoffish. I love a good chat with strangers when I’m out and about, but I don’t want them to sit on my lap.
Baggs
pascal30
When we lay on a beach in India we sat up to find a double circle of people surrounding us just staring... it was unnerving but certainly not uncommon..
Wonder if they were thinking "only mad dogs and Englishmen"? 😉 I actually think lying on beaches in hot places is weird.
I have made friends on short ten minute bus journeys. One of them used to save the seat beside her so I could sit there when I got on.
I do have a personal space thing at home though: when MrB stands in the kitchen taking up far more space than he needs to (arms akimbo etc) in the way! I don't know how he manages it. It's a big room but he always manages to snaffle a bit of my ergonomic space when I'm busy.
It was January and not that hot, just a long white stretch of beach next to the beautiful sea,, and pretty much empty when we arrived. It was bizarre..
That's right BlueBelle but it can be subtle. This is why we always mention the weather first before we launch into problem teenagers, cost of living, lack of shops or anything controversial.
When I arrived in Edinburgh as a young mum who knew nobody, I would speak to total strangers. One day a near neighbour asked me if I was very lonely!
pascal30
When we lay on a beach in India we sat up to find a double circle of people surrounding us just staring... it was unnerving but certainly not uncommon..
Wonder if they were thinking "only mad dogs and Englishmen"? 😉 I actually think lying on beaches in hot places is weird.
I have made friends on short ten minute bus journeys. One of them used to save the seat beside her so I could sit there when I got on.
I do have a personal space thing at home though: when MrB stands in the kitchen taking up far more space than he needs to (arms akimbo etc) in the way! I don't know how he manages it. It's a big room but he always manages to snaffle a bit of my ergonomic space when I'm busy.
micmc47
Interesting how the take on "personal space" has cultural differences. On a virtually deserted beach in Portugal, we were nonplussed when a large family of locals arrived and plonked themselves down right next to us. Yes, we moved away down the beach, no doubt adding to the unfortunate reputation of "Brits Abroad". Had a similar experience in Sweden, where we were happily relaxing at a lakeside picnic table, and with other tables vacant, a Swedish couple decided to join us. Our initial discomfort quickly faded, and we had a pleasant chat.
In 'traditional' restaurants in Portugal everyone happily piles in to sit at long tables, no matter who is next to you. It's a chance to socialise.. I think your presence on the beach may have indicated the 'people' area to them, and they fell in with that. They are very social and wouldn't think of your space as 'personal'. We've had many an interesting conversations with other nationalities through this tendency when we lived in Portugal.
When I was younger and I had no car of my own I was in a few awkward situations with strangers on public transport. It’s rare when we use public transport either a rugby match or a meal in the city centre with friends.
My dh sits opposite me as it irritates me sitting opposite a stranger. I’m not happy when there are seats empty and someone plonks themselves down next to me either. It’s just one of those things to tolerate on public transport. I am fortunate and glad I don’t rely on it.
Yoga mats here!
People are creatures of habit and woe betide you if you arrive early and put your mat out in someone's "space"
The teacher said she had asked one lady to move her mat and the woman picked up her things, left the room and never came back!!
We laughed about it but it is definitely a thing
I am a frequent bus user but not noticed this phenomenon yet
My goodness no wonder we re looked upon as a cold nation
(stiff upper lip and all that) there’s nothing nicer than making ‘a journey go quicker I m sure the lady in question just sat there expecting a little bit of brightness in what could have been a lonely day for her
I remember when I lived overseas and knew no one I used to look forward to the grocery boy coming round just so there was some human contact, a few words exchanged
Surely we don’t all want (need) an invisible cage around us !
The first time we went to China, many years ago, they had seen very few white people. In a department store a lady behind the counter spotted my feet and beckoned all her friends round to stare and laugh at them because she thought they were huge ( not really, British size 6). I thought it was funny and laughed but can you imagine the comments if the situation was reversed? Thank goodness those people weren’t the victim of the woke police.
My mother had a lovely large front garden which she tended with loving care. She had a bench, rockery etc. One day I went outside and there were several German tourists sitting on her bench so I told them politely that this was private land. One lady replied 'You would not mind please if some weary elderly pensioners rested their legs and enjoyed the garden for a few moments'. Couldn't really say anything but felt it was a cheek.
When we lay on a beach in India we sat up to find a double circle of people surrounding us just staring... it was unnerving but certainly not uncommon..
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