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Daughter starts horrendous arguments within minutes of speaking to me.

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Colvillefly Sun 13-Aug-23 23:46:48

Every time my daughter phones up or comes down from London to see me, invariably the most horrendous arguments take place, usually over nothing much. For instance I said I’m letting you know your fathers not well. To which she said “What do you care, why are you acting like the caring wife”. I said because “I am”. Then the insults start and on it goes until I say I’ll have to go now sorry. When I go reams of texts start appearing on my phone, full of insults and hate. I honestly think she has a personality disorder or something of that nature. I was so down and upset yesterday I felt suicidal and decided just to cut her off, I can’t be insulted and put down anymore it is destroying me. Her brothers and sisters also think she has a screw loose and is very vindictive. It makes me sad that it has come to this but I’m not going to be used as a battering ram. I feel so defeated with her behaviour. I sent flowers and she told me it was because I felt guilty for fighting with her, and to shove them. I didn’t I just wanted to show love to her. Does anyone else have this carryon?

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Bunn1e Fri 10-Nov-23 14:35:36

I am sorry you are suffering this. Our daughter behaved like this, eventually cutting herself away from us. It wasn't what we wanted but there is no denying life is calmer without her being unkind to us. She was diagnosed with Borderline Personality disorder (she had been abused as a child and had to give evidence in Crown court at 12). We have no doubt this 'triggered' the BPD but it can occur without abuse or similar factors. Do you think she might have a personality disorder?

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Atqui Fri 10-Nov-23 16:33:27

fancythat

I never understand, on threads like this, why an op never comes back, after the opening post.

I was thinking the same!

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Maremia Fri 10-Nov-23 17:55:05

Had to look back. Yes, the 13th of August.

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Pumpkinpie Tue 21-Nov-23 17:50:49

I can really relate to your post OP. My daughter just rang up . She’s livid because I said we can’t see the GCs because of chicken pox.
1 caught it last wed, other no spots yet but it’s early days Her dad is immuno compromised and told he must stay away from CP as it could have serious consequences .
She is making me feel awful about being cautious

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Fethiye53 Sun 17-Dec-23 19:00:18

I was about to reply to this post when i realised its old and the OP has not been back.

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Berricj1 Thu 21-Dec-23 20:21:21

I can understand this although it is not my daughter but my daughter-in-law on marrying my son and at the wedding Inwas told that he was her husband now and not my son and every time she sees me it ends up with an angry tantrum and screams at me. Then vindictivably tells me I can’t see my grandchildren I have asked both my son and my dil why but get no answer and I don’t know what to do either

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