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AIBU

Letting a delivery driver use your loo

(132 Posts)
62Granny Tue 15-Aug-23 16:15:22

Just had my supermarket shopping delivered and the driver ( not one I have seen before) asked me if there was any public toilets in our village, I pointed him in the direction of the library and the community centre both within a few yards of each other. Hubby said I should have offered him to use ours ?
What do you think ? AIBU?

Milest0ne Wed 16-Aug-23 11:41:52

A friend who was a police detective said in her area, someone was knocking on doors asking to use the loo as she was pregnant. and urgently needed the loo. People who let her in later found that "small " items had been stolen. eg credit Card. mobile phone. She wasn't a delivery driver. SO Just a general warning.
If anyone is worried about allowing a delivery driver into the house, Some companies put a name on the receipt/ order form that comes with the delivery
I would allow delivery drivers to use our bathroom as it is right by the door so has no entry into the house.

knspol Wed 16-Aug-23 11:46:53

I would certainly let them use the loo (might need to ask myself sometime). It's a dreadful feeling to need the loo and not have one nearby. Mind you I'd clean thoroughly after use and watch the loo door to make sure they didn't stray elsewhere - you never know nowadays and I live alone now.

grandtanteJE65 Wed 16-Aug-23 11:54:07

If I was alone in the house, I would no longer allow an unknown person in to use my toilet or for any other reason,

We hear far too many instances of people having been robbed of cash, bank cards etc. because they let someone in.
Or of the "desperate" person being in league with burgulars and looking for suitable homes to break into.

We do have a large, secluded garden, so my answer would be that the driver, whether male or female, was welcome to find a convenient bush in the back garden.

Jess20 Wed 16-Aug-23 11:56:37

B9exchange, awful experience!!!!! Hope you have an online review. I think I read someone was going to be officially appointed to deal with the lack of toilets. It's a disgrace, it kept women out of public life in the past and still does in some countries.

Gwyllt Wed 16-Aug-23 12:04:40

Personally got no problem and if felt unsure would send them down to stables. However a cautionary note. A friend allowed someone to visit the toilet and was left with having to do a full on rubber gloves clean afterwards including the floor

Bluesmum Wed 16-Aug-23 12:08:50

I have a friend who is paranoid about strangers using her loo!!! She even had workmen working in the house fitting a new kitchen, made them copious cups of tea but refused them toilet facilities!!! She knows it is strange and irrational, but she really does not seem able to help it!!! I would let anyone use my loo, and have, I have been desperate myself and it’s not a nice feeling!

Buffy Wed 16-Aug-23 12:09:39

I said yes to an IKEA delivery driver because he’s been on the road for hours. I’m embarrassed to say I changed the towel when he left.

lemsip Wed 16-Aug-23 12:15:13

I bet the drivers are choosey who they would ask bearing in mind the number of premises they visit!

many years ago my child was playing at a friends house but ran home to use our toilet, I asked why and he said the friends toilet was 'dirty rotten filthy'.

Polly7 Wed 16-Aug-23 12:53:15

🙂much easier for a man to have discreet wee! I wouldn't like to ask tbh would you

Schumee Wed 16-Aug-23 12:54:37

B9exchange you can get a Just Can’t Wait Card which you can discretely show in shops and they should allow you to use their toilet.

MerylStreep Wed 16-Aug-23 13:01:52

Buffy

I said yes to an IKEA delivery driver because he’s been on the road for hours. I’m embarrassed to say I changed the towel when he left.

What a horrible thought to have about someone 😟
Not only horrible but senseless, he’d washed his hands.
Do you change the towel every time you use it?

inishowen Wed 16-Aug-23 13:09:12

I was once in a seaside cafe with my 3 Yr old gd. She was eating ice cream when she asked to go to the toilet. The cafe owner told us to cross the busy road to the civic centre. His toilet was for staff only. We reluctantly went across the road and she barely made it. When we got back her ice cream had melted. What a fiasco.

SueBdoo70 Wed 16-Aug-23 13:13:35

I live in retirement property and wouldn’t have a problem allowing anyone delivering to my door access to my toilet. I live alone and have a very soft dog i.e. I would probably have to protect him in the unlikely event that I was attacked or robbed. There’s nothing worse than being desperate to ‘ go ‘ However, when my Ocado delivery man asked where the nearest toilet was recently, I offered mine, he said they were not allowed to use their customer’s facilities ! So I directed him to one on the ground floor.

LovesBach Wed 16-Aug-23 13:18:02

I too have had unfortunate experiences - a man repairing the washing machine in the utility room used the adjacent cloakroom without asking, and when he left I discovered that he had not flushed, and clearly had some sort of major internal problem. Only a few days later another man who had come to look at the drains along the road used my cloakroom without asking and left it in a dirty unpleasant state. I must be most unlucky - it has put me off allowing the use of the lavatory, but it would also depend upon the person; I wouldn't refuse a little old lady, particularly as I am one.

Saggi Wed 16-Aug-23 13:29:46

I would always allow someone to use my loo… it’s inhuman not to!

eddiecat78 Wed 16-Aug-23 13:31:20

5 years ago I had to register my father's death. The registry office was inside the library in Stratford upon Avon and they made a point of saying that no toilets were available to the public. Their advice was to visit the one in Debenhams which was 2 streets away. Just what you need when you are upset and stressed about registering a death!

EmilyHarburn Wed 16-Aug-23 14:17:24

We have an outside loo and delivery and post man are welcome to use it.

pascal30 Wed 16-Aug-23 14:18:43

Fortunately my seaside town is now reinstating public loos after a big public outcry, I would always let trades use my loo and make themselves a drink whilst they work on my house.. I've never been asked by a delivery person but would probably say yes..
however OP answered the question directed to her..which was fair enough IMO

rocketstop Wed 16-Aug-23 14:33:51

62Granny

Just had my supermarket shopping delivered and the driver ( not one I have seen before) asked me if there was any public toilets in our village, I pointed him in the direction of the library and the community centre both within a few yards of each other. Hubby said I should have offered him to use ours ?
What do you think ? AIBU?

Well I decided to do just this last week, I won't name the supermarket but the driver asked if there were any public toilets nearby, I said no , he said he was desperate so I said he could use ours. I won't be too graphic but what followed was me having to leave the fan on and countless amounts of bleach and anti bac spray. So no, don't think I will volunteer again !!!

25Avalon Wed 16-Aug-23 14:36:50

If you need the loo every five minutes then being a delivery driver is not a good idea. For others I guess it depends how long the shift is as to what is reasonable. If someone is working in the house then even if you don’t particularly like the idea it would be churlish to refuse. I’m not particularly happy about delivery drivers using our loo, especially since Covid when no one came in at all. How did they manage during lockdown one wonders?

PinkCosmos Wed 16-Aug-23 14:37:08

I think I would if it was the downstairs toilet. If I was on my own, I would stand by the front door until he had come out though. I can see the toilet from the front door.

I do sympathise with delivery drivers when it comes to toilets. There seem to be fewer and fewer public loos these days.

I would have thought some of them would have one of those portable urinals. I know I would if it was my job.

Dickens Wed 16-Aug-23 14:59:44

pascal30

Fortunately my seaside town is now reinstating public loos after a big public outcry, I would always let trades use my loo and make themselves a drink whilst they work on my house.. I've never been asked by a delivery person but would probably say yes..
however OP answered the question directed to her..which was fair enough IMO

Fortunately my seaside town is now reinstating public loos after a big public outcry,

Glad to hear that - a seaside-town removing its loos? Ridiculous.

When I was in Cape Town SA - all the beaches had public toilet facilities... if that nation, with all its challenges, can provide them, why can't we?

Why do we appear to just accept this removal of such a very basic and necessary public amenity?

Delivery drivers peeing in bottles, millions (and it is millions) of people with medical conditions necessitating the need for them frequently, families with children...

Councils are starved of cash so they can't provide the basic amenities because they have to focus on the 'essentials', whilst £millions are awarded to companies to run our public services - and £billions wasted on useless PPE equipment.

"But there's not enough money" we meekly cry. Well, actually, there is - governments choose what they spend it on, and they've chosen not to spend it on public services.

Delivery drivers shouldn't have to depend on the good-will of their customers, or pee in a bottle. It's so bloody primitive. We're becoming like the third-world countries that so many deride.

(and yes, I was having a rant - because I'm one of the millions with 'problems' and have to think carefully before I go anywhere, which not infrequently means I can't go where I want to because there's no 'facilities')

Bijou Wed 16-Aug-23 15:28:59

Years ago they would use the hedge!
Remember in the 1930s coaches would draw up in convenient place. The men would go in front of the hedge and ladies behind the hedge.
In the 1960s in Belgium my husband pulled up at a garage and asked for the toilet and was pointed to the wall in full view of the road!

Dickens Wed 16-Aug-23 15:49:19

Bijou

Years ago they would use the hedge!
Remember in the 1930s coaches would draw up in convenient place. The men would go in front of the hedge and ladies behind the hedge.
In the 1960s in Belgium my husband pulled up at a garage and asked for the toilet and was pointed to the wall in full view of the road!

... as long as the hedge isn't surrounding your garden - because there's not that many other hedges in an inner city.

JackyB Wed 16-Aug-23 15:51:37

ParlorGames

We have a downstairs and an upstairs loo so offering the use of toilet facilities wouldn't be a problem. The delivery drivers who do call here don't hang around long enough to even say "hello" - just drop the parcel on the steps and hoppit back to the van. There is a large 24 hour supermarket very close by plus two pubs so I might be inclined to direct someone there if I was on my own at home.

However, during the hot weather we do tell our posties to ask for water if they want a drink - the only time we buy bottled water - and offer the use of the loo should they need it.

* * *

From what I hear - and from experience - delivery drivers often don't have time to stop, and just drop the parcel and run. I wouldn't be surprised if they wore nappies to enable them to keep within their inhumanly tight schedules.

As I have said before (sorry if it's too often) we don't have supermarket deliveries here in Germany. I can only judge by Amazon and other parcel services.