Shoes off

We never did shoes off when I was living with my parents and I didn't do it during my first marriage but my children gained the habit from somewhere. My son has ginormous feet and when my late husband spotted a selection of son's footwear lined up down the hall, he said, "I see the Fleet's in", which I thought was very funny.

New husband is a shoes off sort of chap so that's what we do. If only the cat could learn to wipe his feet - half the garden seems to have wound up in the kitchen despite the promised dirt removal abilities of the door mat...

I'm with Lemonsip on this one, my huge bunions are not for public display! When I've been asked to take off shoes or realised it's expected then I'm really embarrassed by my feet and try to hide them, Never ask visitors to remove shoes in my home.

I'm Scottish and have never ever heard of removing shoes being called a custom

Yes, shoes off is spreading. Formerly in Denmark we took a pair of slippers or "indoor shoes" - clean dry shoes with us when visiting in the winter, when women in skirts also has ski-pants to take off.

A chais is certainly handy - even when young jiggling around on one foot taking ski-pants off is not particularly easy.

This is a really good point

My Japanese daughter in law when visiting always removes her shoes as fo my grandchildren. I have friends who visit and do the same but others don’t. Personally I think it’s hygienic and shoes should be removed with chair provided.

Just buy some cheap hotel style slippers for visitors to wear! Better than risking dirty carpets.

Aveline

merlotgran where did you get the idea that all guests would all be shown to a boot room in large country houses? Simply not done.

That is not what Merlotgran said.

Seeing all those mortified older ladies in stocking soles with bunions and corn plasters on display at that unexpectedly 'shoes off' party was awful. Our new neighbour must really regret her insistance on it.

I hate taking my shoes off when I visit people. I’ve usually stood in front of the mirror beforehand to decide which shoes go best with my chosen outfit. My feet also get very cold without shoes which brings on the arthritis in my feet which is very painful. Neither would I want to wear communal slippers. If someone warned me in advance that that was their wish I would take pre cleaned shoes with me. If I’m wearing muddy boots then, obviously, I would take them off. The policy for our own house is shoes are ok downstairs where we have hard floors and rugs. If visitors go upstair, which is rare, we ask them to remove their shoes.

I don’t mind taking my shoes off when popping in to visit friends, although I would never dream of asking anyone to take them off in my house, but I do object very much if I’m asked to take my shoes off if I’m going into someone’s house for a drinks or dinner party. I’m short - 5’ 2” - and my party shoes with heels/platforms are part of my outfit. I feel quite uncomfortable in my stocking feet amongst hordes of giants.

Shoes off in our house. We wear slippers indoors and most people automatically assume that homes are shoes off these days. My husband comes from a country where it is the norm and I prefer it as it helps keep the house clean. @Suedonim, I was at school in the seventies and it was always a rule to change into plimsolls in order to keep the floors clean; especially the parquet floor in the hall. We only had one set of friends (who were always very welcoming) who insisted on shoes off. They and their home were always immaculate. Their two children, who were the same age as my brother and me, were the only children in the whole primary school who came out of school looking as immaculate as they went in - socks clean and up to the knees, no paint or food spilled onto the uniform.
My mother always kept a clean house but it is only in recent years that no shoes has become the rule. I generally take my slippers with me when visiting. I have always been one for mats and coaster. This was drilled into me from a very early age.

If people insist on shoes off then they should ensure that there is something to sit on when people take their shoes off/put them back on. I need to sit down if I put a pair of slippers or warm socks on
I'd not insist on shoes off for ordinary outdoor shoes or shoes that have gone from front door to car then to my front door. I would hope that visitors wouldn't arrive with muddy boots and then not take them off.

I think that it’s sort of rude to expect guests to remove their shoes. I have a sturdy mat built into the porch floor and a large non slip mat at the entrance to the hallway. That should be enough of a clue as to what is expected . I can’t walk without shoes so wouldn’t be able to remove them. I don’t have carpets downstairs. I find them a bit unhygienic from when I had a dog. Much better with solid wood floors.

I don't know how most hallways can have enough seating for a whole book group or other meeting's worth of people to change their shoes when it's home time. We have one chair, but there isn't room for a dozen, and if people formed a queue they'd be there all night, particularly in the winter, when people tend to wear warmer shoes or boots, which take longer to fasten.

As a family , we take our shoes off when entering the house and use slippers . But I wouldn’t ask visitors to remove their shoes as we have hard floors downstairs and a large mat by the front door . Some visitors say shall I remove shoes and I always say no need , I’d rather my guests were comfortable. And in other peoples houses I remove my shoes as it’s become a habit . Again most people say oh it’s fine .
As for a chair or stool , our hall is too narrow .

I read somewhere that asking people to remove their shoes is rather 'common'. It implies you are short of staff to clean the floors.
But seriously, if you're going to a gathering or dinner at someone's house, you tend to wear quite fancy footwear. Not something you want to leave in the hallway and wreck the impact of your outfit. Also, I speak as someone who is 5'2" and really doesn't need to be without a bit of heel. Sorry, but if you invite people in, then just deal with the fact they wear shoes. How picky can anyone be? Life is full of bits of grubbiness. It's not as if you're about to lick the carpet, is it?

As a child cant recall ever having to take shoes off entering home or anyone elses at any time even up until approx 15 years ago no one entering had to take their shoes off. Wellies though seemed to command the "take off"habit. I think its since the designers convinced us all we needed beige/pale carpeting that the shoes off habit arrived. Before we a had patterned usually darker carpeting that didn't show the dirt the same. And of course we are all now paranoid about cleanliness.

Only Neat Freaks would ask or expect you to leave your shoes at the door. They SHOULD provide a chair or bench if that’s how they feel about family, friends and visitors.

I never ask visitors to do this unless they have big black boots. Plus, they always nicely ask first. (Very light carpeting here)

All contractors/workmen already use slip-on covers or spread tarps on the carpeting.

If any of my friends asked me to take off my shoes at their house they would have to put them back on for me on the way out!
I have gadgets for the job at home, but do not take them with me when I go out!

I was brought up to take my shoes off in someone's house unless they insist I don't. My daughter and her children do likewise, as do my son and his young son. I have a pair of slippers at her house and my son's.
A friend who likes shoes to be removed, she gives me a pair slippers to shove on. I hate padding around in socks.

I’m shuddering at the thought of wearing other people’s footwear, even pairs of slippers that have been shared around, but if it doesn’t bother you there’s no problem. I never buy second hand shoes either.

I agree, Molly. I would rather have stockinged feet than wear someone else’s slippers, but it’s Hobson’s choice really.

I agree, Aveline, nothing like that in my childhood home but the family always wore slippers indoors. I really dislike being asked to remove my shoes and ask, if not pre-warned, if they have any slippers I could wear because of a condition I have in one foot. I have 2 door mats by my front and back doors I feel sure that using the rough and then the softer one hasn't cleaned them sufficiently then I'll just live with it! I have carpets throughout!

I wasn’t brought up to remove shoes but to certainly use the door mat provided . Nir were my kids ….but my grandchildren do remove their shoes in my house and I tell them it’s unnecessary. ….its thier dads influence , who was brought up that way! It’s all relative…I don’t mind removing shoes if my socks are decent !