My daughter and her Mum friends have been 'potty training' their babies (they don't like that term, it's called 'elimination communication' which is hard to get my old head around!) since birth.
To start off with I thought it was utterly bonkers, but now my granddaughter is 5 months old and does almost all her wees and poohs on the potty!
She's in cloth nappies and clearly doesn't like being damp or dirty so lets us know when she needs to go. My daughter recognises her cues which I'm starting to pick up on, and pops her on the potty. She wees and poohs pretty much straight away. My Mum says she did the same thing with me to save on washing all those cloth nappies.
I'm mind boggled that babies can express their needs like this. Although apparently in non-industrialised countries 'baby led hygiene' like this is the norm and babies in China wear split crotch pants where the cloth is just whipped off every time they need a pee.
That's what my daughter does. On our Christmas Eve lunch out at a pub she did two discreet wees on the potty.
Does any one else out there have experience of this??
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AIBU
baby led potty training
(33 Posts)Well done. I’ve got three to four year olds not potty trained in my class. By lazy parenting just my opinion after twenty three years!
I too think it’s lazy parenting due to disposable nappies we have 4 year olds coming in the shop with stinky nappies hanging akimbo
All three of mine were out of nappies (that needed hand washing as no washing machine in them dark days) before one year old
All my grandkids were potty trained by one yr old as well ….
none wore disposables
My mum swore by this for we 3, born 1949, 1953 and 58.
Washing and drying nappies and clothes was a much more demanding task than it is now, so the incentive to get children dry was there.
I left my children till age 2, then set to potty training at a tie when I had two weeks off work to do it. It was effective potty training
My dgs2 has basically toilet trained himself!, He leads us to the toilet when he needs a poo. Having a big brother has helped because he copies him
My mum and her sister swore by this on all the children in the family. They said to feed and then hold the baby on the potty.
It never worked for my own and my mother was never with us enough to get the practice going. She did seem to know by my baby's facial expressions when to do it.
My second child did get themselves out of nappies by 18 months by copying their older sibling. They both wore towelling nappies and the second one hated them.
My two were in terry towelling nappies, but not potty trained by 5 months! Probably closer to 1 - 2 years, which was considered quite normal. I think facial expressions are a clue to when they need to use the potty. Well done to your daughter, babushka.
You’ll get mums claiming kids of 3 or 4 aren’t “ready” so sending them to nursery or even reception in nappies, yet years ago most kids were out of nappies by 2 or 2.5 at the latest. Disposables make it too easy to not put the effort in. I’m not talking about SN children btw.
These babies are not "trained" their mothers respond to the baby and provide somewhere for it to do whatever is necessary. If they are not catered to immediately they will just do it. They do not have the capacity to delay the physical action.
It does mean you have to be constantly available for the baby. And there may be a later problem when the child becomes more active.
Yes, as Glorianny says they’re not potty trained - they are in training. I confess to being one of those lazy parents as I never potty trained mine. She just decided one day, a week after she’d turned two, that she no longer needed nappies and that was that. Only a couple of accidents.
It has to be about 39 years since I gave that a thought and I’m not going to start now.
I think years ago most babies were ‘trained’ like this. My sister and I (1950’s) babies certainly were, and so were both mine (1970’s) babies.
My DS said that it was ‘toilet timed’ not ‘toilet trained’.
Perhaps, but it saved a lot of dirty cloth nappies, and no children still in nappies when 3 or 4 years old.
Yes I did this with my DD. I held her over the potty from six weeks old, after feeds and before bathing. It helped cut the number of terry nappies used each day as I didn't have a washing machine. You soon learn the signs and facial expressions of your baby.
Toilet timed is a really good term to use. Toilet trained I reckon is when they can either get themselves to a toilet or potty or ask for it.
But if it saves nappies especially in the winter go for it.
An older friend of mine always said her son was toilet trained at 6 months much to her DILs annoyance. Much as I loved her she couldn't understand the difference.
Never had a problem afterwards gloriana mine both boys and girls were all trained and never had accidents (unless they were out playing whenolder and left it too late and flew in clutching their bits) because although at first you watch for the signs which is your ‘training’ their brains then convert that to that feeling means I do that
I hope it catches on because this ‘let them do it in their own time’ is nonsense and seeing kids of 3/4 stinking with full Pooh nappies is gross and no good to have that hanging around their little bits for long
Nothing new then😂
My two were ‘trained’ the same way. It did require a bit of effort and trailing the potty everywhere though.
I think it is an automatic response to having a cold potty against your skin.
mumofmadboys
I think it is an automatic response to having a cold potty against your skin.
I feel an invention for a warmed potty seat coming on!
My mum's trick was to turn the tap on while the baby was held over the potty, the sound of water seemed to create a reflex action.
When teaching I've had children come to school still not potty trained at 4/5 and they would have cheerfully sat in a dirty nappy all day. The nursery nurse soon had them trained.
Thing is though, this kind of potty training only works if the child's mother (or another constant carer) is looking after it all the time. Mothers who have to leave their young kids with other people while they're at work won't be able to do this.
And I do not think one can accuse a mother or father in that position being guilty of lazy parenting.
BlueBelle
Never had a problem afterwards gloriana mine both boys and girls were all trained and never had accidents (unless they were out playing whenolder and left it too late and flew in clutching their bits) because although at first you watch for the signs which is your ‘training’ their brains then convert that to that feeling means I do that
I hope it catches on because this ‘let them do it in their own time’ is nonsense and seeing kids of 3/4 stinking with full Pooh nappies is gross and no good to have that hanging around their little bits for long
Your children were not "trained". Control of bodily functions does not happen until between 24 and 36 months usually. Their brains do not "convert" anything. There may be a response to being sat on a potty, that is still not training, which is only really completed when a child can anticipate needing the toilet and control the function until they get there.
I was thinking what a strain this imposes on the mother who presumably has to be the one watching the baby and carrying the potty around wherever they go. Most children now are cared for by both parents and often others. They are usually in some sort of day care by 1 year when all of this will be abandoned.
It sounds like it is the parent who has trained herself to spot the signs and react quickly, but if she is not available at the precise time, it won’t work.
My daughter soon learnt to use the potty once we started but she was about 18 m old. My son was not interested but when he was 19 months old, and I was back at work p/t , his childminder trained all her charges one sunny week in the garden. Job done.
Some mums might resent a third party getting involved if they are exceedingly precious about it, but it made my life easier.
The nursery nurse soon had them trained
Not her job though, it’s the parents job.
And yes Glorianny, I realise many are back at work. But that’s the point, how much childcare is delegated to others? The nurturing and caring is what being a parent is all about.
I think the old cloth nappies were so uncomfortable the babies more or less trained themselves. Mine certainly did by about a year to 18 months old. The disposable ones are so comfortable for the babies, why bother until little peer group pressure times at 3 year old kinder?
mumofmadboys
I think it is an automatic response to having a cold potty against your skin.
I think you are correct.
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