I recently enjoyed a lovely cruise with my sister and my best friend. The holiday got off to a shaky start as the 3 of us were due to share a cabin however, the bed arrangement was totally unacceptable. Long story short, the tour rep sorted it and we got an additional solo occupancy cabin for us, which my sister occupied.
The single cabin was a lower category cabin as it didn’t have a porthole and was on the “inside” of the ship. All other amenities etc were as per the original cabin that my friend and I occupied.
A week after coming home my sister informed me that she felt a refund was due from the tour operator as the single cabin worked out at £680 less. I said that any refund should be split between the 3 of us. She has point blank refused to do this.
My sister is several years older than me and single. Over the past six years she has enjoyed several trips away with me or me and my friends. I have invariably organised them and sorted out any hiccups. As she lives a few hundred miles away, she has stayed with us for a few days either side of any holiday so as to be near the airport. She has also stayed for Christmas, New Year etc at our expense.
I have to admit that on the last few occasions I have found her “ hard work”. She has never been a warm person but her coldness and selfish behaviour have become more apparent.
If she is successful in her recovery of some funds and keeps it to herself, I have no intention of holidaying with her again or being hospitable at other times of the year - it’s never reciprocated btw.
I feel that at 60 I do not need her negativity in my life but my other half is of the opinion that I shouldn’t let this refund come between us. It’s not about the money, it’s a principle. We went on the holiday as a group of 3 and if it wasn’t for me speaking with the rep we wouldn’t have got the additional cabin and she would have had to share with 2 other people!
Her new sense of entitlement is surprising and won’t be forgotten.
Just because she’s my sister doesn’t mean I have to accommodate her somewhat prickly character, I certainly wouldn’t choose her as a friend!
Am I being unreasonable to ask her to share any refund that may be made?
And if shes that mean- minded a person then no dont invite her again nor at xmas to stay over or 'airport' stopovers etc- shes treating your home like a free hotel! If you want her at xmas lunch, just state its lunch only.(i would have asked her if she was going to use the £680 for a nice weekend away for the 3 of us instead then?) Or said, 'put it to use for a hotel stay whenever you come for xmas or need airport stays' 😂
You can choose your friends but not your family.Your sister is a user and I agree with Macadia- let it go and let her go ,too. Life is too short .
I would think twice about asking for a refund. The holiday company would come back with the reply that you got the original cabin that you requested plus another, albeit inferior, cabin for free. Therefore a further fee, for the extra cabin, could be due, but in the interests of goodwill nothing extra would be charged. Well done that rep for arranging an extra cabin.
I had a similar situation with my sister so I can understand where you are coming from .
I paid for a ticket for her to come with me.
I upgraded her from economy to business class.
Our flight was badly delayed and the airline paid out delay compensation.
It was paid directly to her . I would have expected at the very least she offer the compensation back to me - but no she kept it .
Had she offered it I would have let her keep it - but no offer .
It left a bad taste !!
So I understand your feelings about your problem of the refund .
If it was a holiday paid towards by all 3 of you then yes i think the refund should also be shared between 3 of you.- i doubt the company addressed the refund or acommpanying letter/email to just her so the fair thing is to share it out. And if they did then why even tell you, its just like using it as a reason to gloat.
But you had the holiday you paid for, your sister didn’t so the money belongs to her.
Like Grannytomany, I’m struggling to understand the maths!
Could it be the single cabin was £680 less than the cabin with two sharing ( and sharing the cost)?
I can’t imagine me even mentioning that my sister came to stay ‘ at my expense’, so maybe SuzeQ is dwelling on the financial side of things ( which may not even happen). I’d let it go.
I think SuzeQ has sailed 🛳️ off into the sunset with the refund…. No sign of her on her thread recently.
I would rather have my own inside cabin than have to share!
Irrelevant I know...
Just saying.
Just be glad that you got yo share with your friend rather than your sister having to put up with you!
It sounds like your historic issues with your sister may have come to a head with this.
What does her behaviour trigger in you?
If you really don't want to be around your sister you'll need to let go of her. How about looking at the relationship as a whole and see if you can find more positive aspects of it.
You mention that she is single. This would suggest that she doesn't have financial or indeed emotional back-up in the way a marriage might offer hence her wanting the refund for herself. Sounds like she has some fear.
Can you not do some inner work and find some kindness towards her.
If I had been put into a cabin with no window and therefore no view I wouldn't be very happy either.
I would let this settle for a while and work through your feelings before you decide anything.
maddyone
I’m confused. Did you pay for the entire cruise for all three of you? Or did you each pay one third each?
If you all paid one third I think the refund is due to your sister, however unfriendly she is, because she agreed to move to an inferior room.
I think exactly as you do maddie, and am also confused over who paid for what.
At first glance, and if I've read the rather confusing situation correctly, I wouldn't like to be told I was the odd one out and was going to an inferior room, and it would add insult to injury if the recompense for my doing so went to someone else.
I don’t understand the costings here.
As someone who usually has to pay a 100% supplement on cruise holidays because I travel solo I’m struggling to understand how a cabin to yourself (even an inside one) is so much cheaper than the individual cost of three sharing a porthole cabin. I don’t know any details of course, ship, cruise line etc., but it doesn’t sound quite right.
Cabins are small with little room to re jig bed positions so it seems a bit misguided to attempt to share a cabin with two other people.
In terms of who got the better deal I think the sister probably did because she had a cabin to herself. It isn’t as if she had to move from a balcony cabin to an inside cabin after all.
But I doubt very much whether you’ll get money back because it sounds as though the company treated you very well. They could just have said sorry, nothing we can do and the three of you would have had to lump the cramped outside cabin.
Any refund will come back to the lead passenger but I wouldn’t hold your breath.
I can understand how you feel. I too feel the money should be split between the three of you. It is true she had a windowless cabin but she also had a cabin to herself.
However, as others have said, there is no certainty that there will be any refund so all this angst may be unnecessary.
It seems to me that this issue is just part of a general feeling you have that your sister has an entitled and ungrateful attitude. Maybe you should cut down the amount of time you spend with her to give yourself a bit of breathing space.
If your party was given a single cabin foc then I can’t see why a refund would be given . You presumably checked out the cabin details and layout prior to booking .
You all got your holiday and an extra cabin albeit an inferior for your sister . If all three of you paid a third of the cost each , then your sister is entitled to a refund as she got an inferior cabin .
A refund hasn’t been requested and is unlikely to be agreed to so suggest you wait and see what happens. Probably nothing. This really is not worth falling out over.
I think you are more mixing up different issues here. I was once told that sorting out any grievances should be like a tennis match; you finish playing one ball before you launch another,
If anything no cash refund, possibly a voucher for your next cruise small % off.
It will go to the person who is the lead name on the paperwork.
I think you all dipped in cabin wise.
It would be a shame to spoil your relationship with your sister over this matter. It's only a 'potential refund' which your imagination has built up into a matter of principle. I'm reminded that I once did lose a deposit on a hotel booking for the two of us, but I kept it to myself and it was only a couple of years when I lost my dear sister. Sisters are far more important than a mere matter of money.
I'm another who feels no refund is due. You ended up with, in effect, an extra cabin!
I would have hated the single one with no portholes. Horrible.
You had what you paid for and your sister didn’t. I imagine that you received your sister’s share of the cost which you paid for on your card. Your sister drew the short straw and had the by far less desirable cabin. No wonder she felt she should have the refund. You got what you paid for and she didn’t.
zakouma66
Can't imagine a world where I worry about refunds from cruises.
I think the real issue isn't money here. Its your relationship with your sibling.
Yes, this!
I also have a sibling who freeloads. He thinks we are all much better off than him (which we aren't) and so we should share it around.
We put up with it though because he's our brother and we love him. If he does offer to pay we accept it with gratitude but otherwise we know what he's like and no, I wouldn't go on holiday with him.
Can't imagine a world where I worry about refunds from cruises.
I think the real issue isn't money here. Its your relationship with your sibling.
What a palava about something that's not even happened yet!
In terms of space, you all came out of it better, but your sister had no view from her cabin.
I very much doubt this will even be considered as serious enough for a refund.
Maybe you'll get a nice voucher so you can all go away for another cruise? 
You are being unreasonable here
Your sister took the inside cabin
You and your friend got a better deal by sharing with less people
Your sister's cruise was negatively impacted, yours was not
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