DD’s wedding

I’m grateful for the tips, thank you. I hadn’t thought of talking to my GP.

I’m very much a loner and don’t have friends, my siblings are older (late 70s, I’m 68), and in poor health. And whilst a small apartment sounds less frightening than a hotel, I wouldn’t know anyone else and would have to get around on my own and use taxis or buses. That’s a dreadful prospect in my nearest town, let alone on a Greek island.

You have to go, or I think you’ll live to regret it.

I’m sorry to say that your post does sound as if it’s all about you, but then I’m not the anxious sort. I’d suggest you get an outfit suitable for the weather and try to be more positive. You don’t have to interact much with the other guests at the hotel if you don’t want to. Given your anxiety, I’m sure they’ll understand? Your DD is the star of this show, marrying her partner where and when she wants. Are the children going to the wedding? Perhaps it would help occupy you to look after them.

A word with your GP might result in some help, but do it sooner, rather than later.

I think you may be doing a bit of ‘thinking up reasons not to go’, the dogs, the leaky roof and dodgy drains etc., when it is probably more about your anxiety here.
Would visit your GP who can prescribe something for the flight if this is just too dreadful to think about. And you can get through the wedding, and if is hot when you travel abroad, a 4 star hotel will have AC, and there will be shady spots to sit in wherever you are, just make sure you pack the appropriate clothing. And get the neighbour to look after the dogs.
It really isn’t as bad as you think, you are over thinking this.

If your DD knows you as a daughter should, she will understand.

You don't have to go. Why do people have such big, difficult weddings? Especially when they've been together for years already. It's just a big fuss. A quiet Register Office do would be uch more appropriate.

Really, they've just invited you to a party.

I meant to add, my son’s wife is Chinese and I didn’t go out there for their wedding 8 years ago, my ex and his partner did, but not my DDs, and my son still reminds me how disappointed they were.

I don’t understand the vogue for destination weddings, where it costs the guests a fortune to attend, and I do think it’s an insane waste of money, but that’s not my prime worry.

Personally I would not miss my daughters wedding for anything.

Speaking to your GP about your anxiety would be a good starting point.

As for the heat, I wouldn’t worry about that either, if you are staying in a five star resort the air conditioning will keep you cool.

Oh I do sympathise will you!

I think you need to try and resolve each issue, one at a time, starting with the dogs!

How long will you be away? The dogs have each other and if your neighbour can be persuaded to go in a couple of times each day to let them out and feed them, perhaps they will be ok.

Please consider visiting your GP and tackling your anxiety, social anxiety is extremely common and there’s lots of different ways of treating it.

Do you have any close friends you could ask to go with you? You could perhaps find a small two bedroom apartment and not stay the full week and stay maybe three nights and you’d have someone to travel with.

Please try really hard to resolve your issues enough to make it out there and let your DD know that you’d love to go, you are going to do your very very best to get there, but to please understand if you don’t actually make it.

Best of luck

You have to go. Agree get neighbours to sort dogs, they will probably dozz the day away.
You might to speak to your GP about your anxiety but you have to go.

You need to go, it's her wedding. Ask the neighbours to check in with the dogs and let them out before bed and first thing in the morning. I don't think you have any other choice

I wouldn’t go, I cannot cope with the heat and do not like social situations either.

It will be one awkward conversation, preferably by phone, then it is over. Do not say about the dogs as it would sound as though you put the dogs before your daughter, stick to the heat ,flying issues and anxiety. State that you will look forward to seeing any pics and videos and be firm saying I am not coming to the wedding rather than I dont want to.