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Comparison is the thief of joy.

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Washerwoman Fri 22-Aug-25 09:01:58

I keep telling myself that but AIBU in that in the present moment I feel a bit low.So many of our friends are away on yet another exotic or interesting holiday but relatively we don't have the funds.I wouldn't even want to be away half as much,nor necessarily cruise or go long haul.And I know again relatively to others we are so lucky.Mortgage paid off,some savings as a buffer and I get my state pension soon which will help.But over the years DH losing his business in a recession and various other setbacks despite both working very hard our retirement is going to be a very modest one.Normally I don't mind as I love my home ,garden pets and grandchildren and volunteering which all keep me busy.Perhaps that's it.I am tired as it's been a tough year with DH having a big operation and a DD with children splitting from her partner, I just feel a bit stuck in a rut.We are going away for a short break to stay with an old friend soon but that wasn't what we intended.If I'm honest her DH is fine in small doses but I find him not the most relaxing to be around.Always cracking jokes and often at my expense.A bit of a 'character '.I usually stay a few days on my own with her and we have a lovely relaxing catch up.But my DHs op was the same time as her DHs sports trip away and he is repeatedly asking for us both to go as he likes my DH -which is good -and we really cant say no any longer.
I think that's at the heart of my down day and I know it will pass .That short solo stay with my friend always feels like 'me' time and really recharges me.So I will walk our dogs and trust myself to a swim with a coffee afterwards and plan some little trests give myself a stern talking to !

feels he can't take anymore time away from his business -self employed snd his op has kept him off work .

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JOJO60 Tue 26-Aug-25 11:10:23

All my group of friends go on multiple foreign holidays and cruises each year, and think DH and I are boring because we don't. We enjoy exploring the English countryside in our caravan with our dogs, doing projects in our lovely garden, and sitting together talking for hours. We have lots of hobbies we enjoy too. What I've found with our friends is this: 3 couples are not particularly "happily married" and apart from going on holiday they have nothing in common with each other. And 3 others are divorced /widowed so have no-one to share with daily lives with. So I am grateful that I don't NEED all those exotic holidays to feel happy and fulfilled. Maybe you don't need them either, you have a lovely husband and enjoy other things. I feel grateful that I am content with my life. I think there are many others who aren't.

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Gin Tue 26-Aug-25 11:43:14

After a couple of holidays where chaotic hours in uncomfortable airports with pushing and shoving at boarding gates we decided we would stay at home and have had some lovely holidays. Sometimes we have had arranged trips with local travel companies who pick us up so all is hassle free or as last week, in an air b&b with our family which was delightful. As long as I do not have to cook and I can do what I like when I like and not feel pressurised to sightsee or be organised in any way I am happy. My best photo from last week is me being taken for a paddle by my teenage grandson to see that I did not slip and fall in the sea!

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