Husband wants us to go to live in Portugal

I think you need to put your foot down and make it absolutely clear that you do not want to move. Give him all the reasons that you have given us. Living somewhere is very different from being on holiday and I suspect he too would soon get bored.

It is not easy to move to Portugal from the UK.My ex husband has bought a house there,given proof of having a reasonable income( I think that there is a minimum requirement) opened a Portugese Bank Account,but still isn't allowed Portugese residency until about 7 years have passed. He has a home in the Uk and has to live between the 2.
He is very happy with the time he spends in Portugal and his Portugese neighbours have been very welcoming and kind to him but it does not appeal to me.

AFAIK you need proof of a certain amount - quite a lot! - of savings if you want to move there. At least that’s what I’ve heard from American friends who were thinking of retiring there, but maybe it’s different for Americans. (They still haven’t gone and escaped the New Hampshire winters!)

Ask him to find out what health care costs in Portugal, how you would be placed if one or other of you had to move into a care home later on, and whether you will need to pay tax both in Portugal and in your native country.

Finally, whether he wants to be buried in Portugal or not and whether you will both have to re-write your wills to ensure that they are valid in botoh countries.

In Spain an estimate from a tradesman is only binding with regards to cost if it has been notarilized by the public notary, which of course requires you to pay a fee. I do not know if the same applies in Portugal, but it may well.

Finally, you both need to learn the language - English is not spoken automatically by everyone of our ages, or even by professionals (doctors, lawyers, undertakers etc,)

So take a long hard look at the practicalities and make him do so too, before considering a move.

Might a compromise be possible? Spend part of the year in Portugal, part at home?

Witzend, that is the same for any non EU citizens including UK.
Also the weather can be bad there too depending on where you are in Portugal
A positive is that buying a property can be more affordable than the UK

Sadgrandma

I think you need to put your foot down and make it absolutely clear that you do not want to move. Give him all the reasons that you have given us. Living somewhere is very different from being on holiday and I suspect he too would soon get bored.

It is quite obvious that you don’t want to go. You have a job and enjoy your life here. You were even bored during the holiday. If you decide to have a few weeks there, make sure you have plenty of things to keep you occupied.

Google says you need 920 Euros per person per month to live there as a pensioner.

You also both need to be aware that your British state Pension will not rise once you move abroad and stay at the rate it is when you move, you can't claim things pension credit or Attendance allowance if one of you falls ill. So you will be living on your sorely savings.

I know a young person who has moved to Lisbon from London and adores Portugal. Living accommodation is much cheaper and she is hoping to buy her first home next year. Impossible here. Also the climate, food and a very friendly and supportive work community are all much better than here. Obviously retirees will have different needs?

We moved to France when we retired and love it but have animals, friends, voluntary work etc to keep us occupied. From my observations of other couples who have moved here it never works well unless both partners are equally committed to the move. Women especially miss children and grandchildren. Rules around income etc have become stricter since we moved here. Could you divide your time between Portugal & UK as a compromise.

62Granny

You also both need to be aware that your British state Pension will not rise once you move abroad and stay at the rate it is when you move, you can't claim things pension credit or Attendance allowance if one of you falls ill. So you will be living on your sorely savings.

Are you sure that is the case 62Granny we can claim other benefits and get the state pension rises here in France.

62 Granny

I think you would still get state pension increases if you moved to Portugal, unlike Australia for example.

But if the OP is so against moving, then I think it’s a definite no-no. You must both want such a complete change.

Friends of ours moved to live in Portugal permanently. Their only DD married a Portuguese man, and had a family, they went to see more of them all. I think they would be comfortably off over here, sold a nice property and bought an apartment there.

But completely different scenario, of course, to the OP.

No, I would not go. You have a life here and you work. The fact you said it would not suit you, and you were bored in holiday talks me it is not right for you.

You have said you are willing to go out there 4 to 5 weeks a time, that should be enough for him. I also get bored sitting by a pool, and getting too hot. I like to be doing things.

I’m sure most people have enjoyed an overseas holiday and thought how nice it would be to live in that country. But the occasional two week holiday is very far removed from emigrating somewhere especially if you do not speak the language and don’t want to confine yourself to a community of other English speakers.

Why does he want to leave the UK and why Portugal? There are many countries where one can walk, sit on a balcony and dine out. In fact, one can do that in the UK. Maybe you just need a change of scenery within the UK.

Does he know why?

If he's keen he will have investigated but it seems he would leave any actual investigations and paperwork to you.

He's got his head in the clouds and being totally unrealistic. I'd tell him very firmly that, if he wishes to go, he is welcome and you will visit him for a couple of weeks or so at a time but that you are staying put.

One consideration - is the house in joint names? Any chance of selling and splitting the proceeds between a smaller place for you here (he can visit you) and a flat in Portugal for him?

PinkCosmos
You might find this article interesting and informative.

www.google.com/search?q=can+a+uk+citizen+move+to+and+live+in+portugal&ie=UTF-8&oe=UTF-8&hl=en-gb&client=safari
You say you don’t have a good pension or substantial savings. These are crucial to getting your visa.
Don’t think that this will be automatic. It only needs one jobsworth to deny your entry.
You will have to employ a legal translator to buy your property.
They don’t come cheap.
Don’t believe the sun shines all the year round, it’s not the Costa del sol. You will be facing the cold Atlantic Ocean.
I know this as we have spend many winters in our motohome in Portugal.

I met a couple who had a flat in the same building as DS. She lived there most of the time, had friends in the same building and a busy social life. He lived in Spain most of the time but she clearly didn't want to.

She went to spend time with him in Spain for holidays etc; he lived in the flat in England with her for holidays, especially at Christmas.

Presumably they'd downsized to afford two smallish places to live, but it worked for them.

I'd pack up my worries and go with him, but that's me. You need to do what's right for you. Seriously, with my sebsible hat on, I would think very carefully about the financial implications first and foremost. In my experience, you need to almost double the amount you think you'll need.

Thank you.

He seems very unsettled since he retired. His days seem without purpose. He says he hates gardening and doesn't really do DIY. He is not a reader and has one hobby which takes him out for the day.

I have said that if he does move, he will still be him - if you see what I mean.

I don't think I could take the stress of moving and all the complications.

I would be up for five or six week visits though. As a poster said, the weather isn't always that great in Portugal. We went one year and it rained all week.

If he leaves all the administration to you, just do not bother to do it.

Insist of keeping a property in the UK in case anything drastic happens when in Portugal and you have to return to the UK. sell your house here and you will only be able to afford to rent if you return.

You need to learn the language. Would your DH do that?

I would just sit stumm, say nothing committing, do not begin to take any action that might facilitate a move. If he can be lazy and dilatory, so can you.

MartavTaurus

I'd pack up my worries and go with him, but that's me. You need to do what's right for you. Seriously, with my sebsible hat on, I would think very carefully about the financial implications first and foremost. In my experience, you need to almost double the amount you think you'll need.

We have lived abroad in the past because of my DH's job. We were much younger then. He was on a good salary and everything was arranged for us.

If I was twenty years younger and didn't have family I might consider it.

I feel like we are too old to uproot ourselves now.

Allira said - ^'If he's keen he will have investigated but it seems he would leave any actual investigations and paperwork to you.

He's got his head in the clouds and being totally unrealistic^

This has hit the nail on the head. He has always had his head in the clouds and I have always been the practical one

Why not rent a place for a few weeks in spring or autumn - not too hot for you, this means you can try different locales every time and is a sensible thing to do if thinking of moving there. A few weeks in winter would also be required. And perhaps then your DH might not see the point in moving there but be happy with just renting for a couple of months each year. The dream is nearly always far removed from the reality.

The grass is not always greener (although it could well be if it indeed it rains a lot).

We knew a retired couple who had downsized, invested in their son's business which failed then decided to move to Spain because the property was cheaper and they thought the lifestyle would be better.
After a few years when they became older and less fit, they wanted to come back but could not afford to find anywhere to live here at a price they could afford.

He seems very unsettled since he retired
So was my DH, but after a while after I'd had enough I encouraged him to join various groups which he did. He took to them with great enthusiasm, joined committees and he was always out.
We did join the NT and visited a lot of places together.

Just don’t go! Tell him firmly that you want to stay in the UK.Don’t give him reason to think you’re going to change your mind.