Depression

Brandy Thank you for responding, and no need to apologise. I wasn't in the least upset by your post, but rather pissed-off with some of the responses you received initially.
I hope you can find some support and information here, and I am so sorry you are experiencing depression.

Ssri' s do not cause memory loss.

Is this a clever advert for a book?

Brandy - if you had explained a little more fully in your first post it would have been useful. We are often asked to contribute to research and it seems sometimes that we are, indeed, seen as a convenient bunch of free guinea pigs.
The way you worded your post made it seem you had not even bothered to ascertain the date of the blitz.
I am sorry you are suffering from depression and I hope some of the replies will be useful to you.

What book j08

Start again, Brandy, though I think Elegran's post has given you a good deal of useful information. There was a greater sense of communoty during and after the war, especially if, like me, you lived in a smallish town where everyone knew everyone else. Not that that was always beneficial! It's probably significant that it was only when we moved (because of dad's job) to a different community where everyone knew everyone else but we didn't, and when I went to university, my sisters to school in Edinburgh all day, that my mother developed severe depression. I know now, with hindsight that it also coincided with her menopause.

Thank you all for your replies (Elegran especially thanks for your detailed reply)

I've tried just about everything to get better... every possible medication, CBT, Counselling etc. but nothing seems to be helping. I used to be a career-minded professional, outgoing, friendly and slim now I'm a reclusive and obese mess, too scared to even go out alone.

The only thing I haven't tried is the good ole' 'pull yourself together' trick, facing my fears, worries and demons.... The book by Angela Patmore is supposed to help you with this approach.

I know that GPs prescribing ADs has become a bit of an epidemic, and as the book suggested I just wanted to find out what people did/how they coped before Prozac etc. I guess the author was just attempting to show that there are other possible coping strategies that perhaps we have forgotten about in this age of repeat prescriptions.

I long for somebody (my GP) to actually listen to my troubles and tell me that I will get back to the person I used to be... But 5 minute appointments (because they are overworked/oversubscribed) only gives them chance to keep dishing out prescriptions.

Thank you all once again for your help and replies. I really am sorry if I have offended anyone.

Those prescriptions you disparage can be lifesaver.

You can spend a fortune on self-help "programmes" which is what this book calls itself. Better to consult a doctor.

Greatnan - I am sorry, I didn't know that people would come on here to use you as guinea pigs, it was not my intention to upset anyone, just to get some help and advice.

j08 - SSRI's can cause memory loss. For instance quite often I forget the name of an object in front of me and no matter what I just can't remember, I can walk into a room and not know what for when I get there, I used to work in I.T and now I can barely type on a computer, I just can't remember how to do things.

In the beginning of my depression, I too was told that they didn't cause memory loss, however I found great relief on depression forums to find out that my symptoms were infact common and they were confirmed by my psychiatrist when I finally got to see one.

I'm sorry to make anyone suspicious of my reason for being here. I really am just looking for peoples thoughts, tips and advice.

Thank you to everyone who has replied.

j08, I really don't know why you are taking everything I am writing as a reason to attack. I know I got off on the wrong foot on this forum, I have apologised and I sincerely did not mean to mislead anyone.

I am not disparaging prescription medication, god knows I have been reliant on it through out my life, I was merely saying that ADs have not and are not working for me - I was changed on to Prozac (Fluoxetine) about 3 months ago as another AD wasn't working, since being on this medication I have never felt more suicidal in my life than I have in these past few months.

I understand that medications help a lot of people and are a lifeline. I just wondered if there was anything from the past that I could try. I hadn't really thought through my initial question, but after reading all the responses I of course know that it was stupidly written....

Perhaps I could start again.. clean slate... Any tips for being positive when inside you are feeling anything but???

I have not, thank god, suffered from depression, (though I have been unhappy) so feel free to ignore what I am about to say.

Perhaps one way of coping would be to accept that you are unhappy, and stop trying actively to "cure" it by do, do, doing this and that for it and focussing a microscope on how you are feeling today.

Say to yourself that it is there, but you are damned if it is going to be the biggest thing in your life. Find someone who has one of the many definable reasons to be unhappy and see what you can do or say to improve their siuation. There are many lonely or disadvantaged individuals and groups who need help. Who knows? in helping them you may well find that you are taken out of yourself and enabled to heal.

Brandy, I have thankfully never suffered from depression so cannot know how you are feeling and I wish you well on your road to recovery.

J08 was supportive when others were being quite rude and unhelpful. I think you have got hold of the wrong end of the stick.

Brandy. I think you'll probably find that historically women with depression (until relatively recently) were considered hysterics and emotionally deficient so it wasn't something that people talked about much. There was a culture of 'pull yourself together' too. Even the poor soldiers buried their feelings rather than admit what they saw as weakness. My great grandmother was locked away in a lunatic asylum during the 30s for depression that we now believe was probably linked to the menopause. It was considered shameful and the family didnt talk about. I'm not sure looking for historical cures are very helpful but I wish you well.

Brandy - now I understand I feel very sympathetic. My own daughter is addicted to codeine which was given to her following a botched operation. She is also suffering from severe depression and has talked about suicide. She has recently been given some anti-depressants (I don't know the name, as she has cut off all contact with me) and her daughter tells me she has had a very bad reaction to them.
I have never been treated for depression (I am just very sorrowful about my daughter) but I do know that different people react in different ways to various types.
'Snap out of it' is just about the most useless advice to give a depressed person - if it were that easy, obviously you would do it.
Do you have a good support network of family and friends?

I apologise if I am wrong about the book. I thought it was odd that you gave both the title and the name of the author rather than just referring to "a book I was reading".

I can strongly recommend exercise. I find that the most helpful thing. And a good book of the escapism kind. And sunshine when available!

I do think ssri' s are invaluable.

Thank you all for your replies.

Merlotgran, thank u for pointing out my error, I was feeling a bit bombarded.

J08 - apologies again. I got hold of the wrong end of the stick with your last comment. Thank u for your support.

Elegran - That is really good advice. I don't know how much help I could be, but perhaps there is something I could do to help others. Concentrate on something else other than me. Thank youx

Mollie - Thank you for sharing, I'm sorry for your Great-Grandmother. I think you are right about not looking backwards for help.

Good night all, thanks again x

This thread might interest you brandy - there is a link to Ruby Wax's book and also a talk on TED.

On a positive note I think your typing is faultless. Your certainly haven't lost those I.T skills. Change GP and book double appointments. I'm a great fan of Tanya Byron who writes on a Monday in the times on a variety of subjects. She always strikes me as humane ,intelligent and has an ability to think outside the box. Perhaps have a look at what she has written.

I sympathise Brandy, my son has had depression since he was a teenager and SSRI's affect him very badly. He has to get himself through the bad times through sheer willpower, but he struggles and is very hard to live with at those times.

Have you read any of Dorothy Rowe's books? Not a cure, or a quick fix, but she has been around for a very long time and is very insightful. Hope you feel some soon.

Brandy I too have suffered from clinical depression and now realise that I will be taking ADs for the rest of my life. I am very lucky in having a wonderful DH who would persuade me to go for walks not in my local park but a nearby one where I wouldn't meet too many people. I was also very lucky in my GP who would give me as much time as I needed with her. At that time I also worked and was able to use a counselling service provided by my employer. That had the greatest impact on me and gave me the insight into where my depression sprang from. The lady I saw only needed to ask me the occasional pertinent question and I managed to open up to her in a way that has helped me deal with my problems. I hope that you will feel better soon.

Brandy. I am sorry you are feeling so awful. I have suffered with severe depression brought on (I believe) by some terrible things happening in my life. Depression is a nightmare, which affects not just the sufferer, but friends, family and all aspects of your life. I think that forums where fellow sufferers post can be helpful to know you are not alone. Just as Gransnet has been a help to me to know that I am not the only gran having family issues. Good Luck.

Meant to add. Someone recommended books by Dr Clare Weeks (or Weekes) which I found helpful.

Brandy sorry you are having such a rough time. I would agree to change your GP and have some long term CBT (6 weeks is NOT enough) with a fully qualified therapist. A combination of the right medication, good therapy and home support (i.e. from family) is the best combination you can have for treatment. Unfortunately, it is not a quick fix and you may need medication for quite some time, but the CBT should get you on the right track. This is from experience of both my daughters and myself, we had excellent therapists (not all the same or at the same time!!!) combined with excellent GPs and family support. A difficult time for you. Good luck

Hi Brandy. I know what you are going through. And if there is one thing I can say to you, it is: This will pass. I got so close to the edge, that I was actually thinking of how I was going to commit suicide. Someone was looking down on me that day because it was that thought that made me realise what a bad way I was in. This was while I was still working.
If there is one thing I know for sure will help, j08 and betysgran have said it.
Exercise. Just move. Walking is wonderful. If there is somewhere quiet you could walk, swing your arms as well ( big smile)
I wish you well. PM me if you want. I've been there.

Brandy - just to add - I suffer from clinical depression too and find Ruby Wax's online site 'Black Dog Tribe' very supportive and helpful