Hi please help

janerowena, that could be a good idea, just to perhaps see what my choices could be, but it is difficult because he is our son so how far an you go, I don't know! just such a messss

Read through this thread, for a start. I think you will find that we are all saying the same thing! Calm down and start plotting. I know he's your son, but what an ingrate.

Elegran he does not want to go homeless becaue he said they will put him in a Hostel, he is a nightmare. I really don't know what I am going to do

Go to CAB, they could perhaps give you a few ideas too.

I just want to cry I feel just so alone with this no one to turn to for help or support

If he were homeless when he had to leave his flat, registering with the council would make him an urgent priority for housing. If your house is overcrowded, or if he had to leave it, that would be a priority too.

Your husband helps him with money, you gave him your car but he won't share it with you,you have terible rows, he moved in with you for a couple of months and now when you ask him to go he refuses.

Is this a son or a cuckoo?

Jinglebellsfrock I have tried telling him he has to leave but he takes no notice, he claims its his house too I feel so desparate What can I do other than physically throw him out I have no support from my husband, if he does say anything he usually sides with my son I just dont know what I am going to do

For a start I would sell the car. If you can't use it, then neither can he. It would show that you mean business. I'm tempted to say, get a solicitor to write out a tenancy agreement with rules for living with you in it, and if he disobeys, he will be evicted.

OMG! It sounds a nightmare. You will have to tell them they can't stay that long. You've got to stick up for yourself.

When you say you gave him the car, was there paperwork done? Can you claim it back.

You've really got to be friendly but firm. Establish yourself as "top dog".

Thank you loopylou I do hope so, waiting, real could do with some advice

thankyou so much Nelliemoser I really do hope so!

Could/would they go and stay with her parents? Or alternate between you to give you a bit of a break? When everything is so fraught it must be very difficult to think straight.
I sympathise with having a husband who also has ostrich- like tendencies, which doesn't help when you need back-up.
I'm sure Gransnetters will come up with some suggestions to consider, many wise minds contribute here.

meant to say hate having no control of things

Tonia54 You are by no means alone with this problem. Several GNrs have been in this sort of situation.

Hang about on here and there will be someone come along who can make some helpful suggestions.

Thank you for your reply mishap,it is not my choice though because I have asked him to leave and he refuses this is the worse bit for me because I truly hate being in control, its such a nightmare

How difficult. But it us your home and you can choose whether he stays there or not. What does your OH think? - I know he wants to stay out of it, but does he want your son there?

Can you say to your son that he is welcome as long as things stay peaceful - if there are lots of arguments you will have to rethink?