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Pangs of sadness through getting old

(108 Posts)
Tegan Wed 15-Apr-15 20:16:03

I've had a young lad working on my house this week, and it's been great chatting about music and films etc. The sort of conversations I used to have at work [or with my kids when they had time to talk to me]. But I do feel old these days even though, as Parcs says it takes me by surprise sometimes and I wonder how I got to be where I am now [seem to have been on fast forward for a few years].

NotTooOld Wed 15-Apr-15 20:14:31

I think it is worse for us older women. We tend to become invisible and get overlooked. It's as though we have nothing to contribute to society any more. I was totally bereft when I retired and it took me literally years to get over being a useful and contributing member of society. It became a little better after the grandchildren were born and I felt I had something to offer in terms of the odd bit of child minding and as they got older I have been able to teach them stuff like arts and crafts that they don't do at home. I'm trying now to find more to do locally and have put my name forward as a member of the Patients' Forum at the surgery and as a Parish Councillor and also a Peer Supporter for the OU. My recent op has put this on hold for the moment but I am beginning to think I must get back into it.

janeainsworth Wed 15-Apr-15 20:11:13

Ashtree grin

Ana Wed 15-Apr-15 20:04:50

Being constantly around people of your own age can have a negative effect in that you no longer feel comfortable with younger people, so they don't with you - bit of a vicious circle.

I'm sure none of us wants to end up as one of those old people who do nothing but moan about their aches and pains and seem to have no interests apart from the weather and what's on the tv!

AshTree Wed 15-Apr-15 19:57:59

I do agree with you janeainsworth. It's what I miss about work - I don't miss the work itself (!) but I do miss being with people of all ages. And because I worked at a students' union, apart from the 40 odd permanent staff, we had a huge number of student staff too - their youthful enthusiasm was so infectious!
Not long after I retired a few of us met up for lunch and one of the younger workers made some comment or other about it being "all right for you lot, I've got to go back to work in 20 minutes". One of my fellow retirees, quick as a flash, said "serves you right for being so young" grin

Parcs Wed 15-Apr-15 19:56:46

I do not look at it like that really, I just like being around people of my own age so that I have something in common with them and am not constantly conscious of my age.

janeainsworth Wed 15-Apr-15 19:48:27

Important to mix with younger people too parcs, it might make you count your blessings when you see what they have to contend with!

Parcs Wed 15-Apr-15 19:38:04

I don't know what's the matter with me lately, I am becoming very aware of my age

Being a Grandma is lovely of course but it does make you feel old being one of the oldest in the family.

I still can't believe it sometimes, and when I am called Nan I do look behind me thinking, Nan, is that me!!

But then I remind myself of George Clooney and Helen Mirren and my own Father and realise that getting older does not have to mean Being Old!! or looking Old.

I do believe that it is very important to mix with and have contact with people of your own age.