How do other's cope?

One of my daughters and two grand children are in Australia. It just sucks. Hate it.

I know its not much comfort but at least now we have Skype, email, even straightforward phones. When my Grandfather sailed to India for work as a young lad he never saw his parents again. Similarly, when my Dad had to return to the UK for school he didn't see his parents again for years. I often think about how desperately painful these times must have been for our families in the not so distant past. Bottom line these days we can, in emergency, actually jump on a plane almost anywhere and be there in 24/48 hours. Better than months on a ship which was the alternative in the old days.
I do know that's not what the OP is about. I completely understand her misery. I would feel exactly the same myself. It had just got me thinking.

We live far from ours too, but thankfully I can still travel to see them. Not often enough though.
You'll find that after a while it won't be so heartbreaking - I sometimes forget that special feeling of being with your own flesh and blood, there's nothing like it.
I'm going hopefully to see 2 of the families this week - hooray!
When first we all spread far apart I used to write a long letter each week about family matters, and sent a copy to each of them. That helped a lot. They replied when they remembered.
Hang on in there - things will get easier.

I am so sorry to hear that Heartbroken, my daughter and two grandsons live 20 minute drive from me but I havent seen them since March as I have had words with my daughter. The way I look at it is as long as you know they are alive, happy and healthy that is what matters. Sometimes you just have to be grateful for that. I agree it is not enough, but better than nothing. Lots of Hugs to you and hope things get better x

So sorry to hear that Heartbroken- I so feel for you. Are they a very long way away- is there no way you could go there, with help from DH or from friends- or even some organisation, perhaps?

(((( hugs ))))

It is such a sad old world. heartbroken

My son moved away a day before I buried my mother 4 years ago,I suffered PTSD because my mother was abused before her death. I have a husband,but no other family. I want to be part of my grandsons life,but I won't.

I have three children, all three live many hours way. USA, East and West coast, and Australia.
You just have to get used it. That sounds harsh, but it is the truth, as I see it.
My feelings are if they are happy and healthy, then I am happy for them.
And as yogagran says, you have brought your son up to be strong enough to make his own decisions.
Skype/FaceTime is wonderful and it does keep family in touch.
Mine are all in touch regularly. However I do cry every time they click off!!
It hurts, believe me I do know.
Hang on in there, as others have said, it does get easier, not a lot, but it does.

I'm also a long distance granny with DS and DGS on west coast USA. We've seen DGS once, for two weeks, but do make use of Skype. He's only just turning 2 but at least with Skype he will recognise our voices and our faces. We won't be totally strange to him when we next meet.

It's awful to miss DS and DGS so much.

I'm another "long distance Granny" with DS and family of two little ones in Canada. I do visit twice a year but the goodbyes are heartbreaking for everyone. Just try to be grateful that they are happy and doing what they want. You have done a wonderful job in making your DS strong enough to make his own choices. We bring them up to be independent but it's incredibly hard when they decide to do just that.
Your parenting has achieved what you set out to achieve - that you raised an independent adult

My heart goes out to you, it really does, but please don't go down because of this. Your son came to see you, you are a part of their lives albeit from a distance. Make skyping a time to get to know that little boy, he will be anxious to get over to see you. Send him little presents, letters and cards, be involved from a distance. Is there no way you could get over to see them? If you are not completely housebound, Try and get a new interest and meet new people, if you are housebound do an online course or chat on this and other forums. You have done a good job bringing up your son and now he has flown the nest, but he will keep flying back.

Your message really chimed with me as I am a long distance grandma as well and it does feel awful a lot of the time. Skyping is supposed to help but like you, it somehow makes it even harder. Our twin grandchildren live in Canada and we have been out to see them (we are lucky at the moment as we can travel) but I have found it even more difficult during our visit and immediately afterwards. Most people I know seem to have their family around them so it can feel very lonely.
I don't think there is an answer - I just learn to live with it and try and keep up contact with the twins as much as I can. I knit comfort blankets for them (which they love) and send out some parcels every so often. It is not cheap but I want them to know that they have a grandma who loves them. You will find that it gets a little easier as time passes and I try and keep busy and active so I don't dwell on my son and grandchildren so much. I hope it gets easier for you. Gransnet can help.....

Yes, it will get better though you'll find that hard to believe at first. You'll find a way to get by, though birthdays and Christmas and other occasions will always be hard.

Why don't you start a book of memories for your little GS? Write down how much you loved seeing him, how you feel at him being so far away, but also lots of little things that you could tell him about yourself.

Then one day, hopefully far into the future, he'll have the pleasure of reading it himself and will feel closer to you.

But as jingl said, don't be afraid to cry.

Thanks,I have just joined and I appreciate your kind words and hugs.

The pain will lessen in a while. I know that doesn't help at the moment.

Let yourself cry. I read somewhere, "tears are the soul having a wash".

I am so sorry for you. I used to cry when my grandsons went home and that was seeing them fortnightly. I don't know how to help you. I can understand Skyping would not really help. ((hugs)) to you.