What is retirement really like?

TheMaggiejane1
Your first sentence more or less summed up the whole issue of retirement.

We are lucky in that we can manage to live without worrying about how to afford to eat or keep warm.

I retired at 63. I could have retired at 60 but for various reasons my husband was not able to work regularly due to health issues. I was hanging on to retire in May 2011 when he had a works pension coming in.

The year before I retired there were big changes at work and basically my self and a colleague both about 63 were being phased out by management.
At one point we knew the job was changing and as we always had done, applied ourselves for a course that was essential to a change of role.
The new manager virtually applied dirty tricks to us and told us he wasn't going to authorise us doing this. Essentially this could have been constructive dismissal.

In the middle of 2010 my husband health issues were diagnosed as a benign brain tumor and treated, but all the stress of that as well as the very sneaky way the new manager was dealing with us was dreadful.

I left work just before new year after as I had a hammer toe operation in early Jan so after all the 2 months sick leave for my foot, I went off sick as I really felt so stressed to just have to go up the office to sort out my belongings etc.
I arranged with the manager that "as they clearly wanted me out" (my actual words) would they mind me just taking just two months notice instead of three.

In my resignation letter and interview I gave them all the details about how badly we had been treated all very clear. That letter, the interview and the copy of this I sent to the very top women, gave me great satisfaction. I did get a apology about the way some of this had been dealt with.

The whole way my 23 yrs working there had ended was really miserable.
I got very down after all that but survived.

I enjoy retirement now. My time is filled with two little grandsons, two choirs some good friends who keep me laughing and my garden.

I'm not retired I'm a Professional Grandmother, got that Placque on my wall.
Retired 4 years ago to look after second grandchild and my mother who lives 50 miles away from me. I spend four days looking after the grandchildren, school runs etc., as they do not live near me I'm up at 5.30am to get to their house for 7am when my daughter and son-in- law leave for work. My daughter is a 'nanny' she looks after other peoples children while I look after hers. On a Thursday after picking up from school it's rush home for a snack, before my granddaughter whose 9yrs old goes to her dance class, my grandson and I wait there for her. Then straight after there we rush off to Brownies. Then take grandson whose 4yrs home for tea, get ready for bed, wait for my daughter to get home 7.30pm cup of tea, quick chat re how kids are, then home. I get home about 8.30/9pm and collapse in the chair. My husband bless him appreciates I love looking after the kids, sometimes he comes with me. On day five I drive 50miles to my mum who is in an assisted living home, she has dementia, profoundly deaf, Insulin dependent diabetes. I take her shopping, lunch, and do her numerous Dr. Appointments either with the hospital or Gp. I get there for 10am and arrive back home about 9pm it's a long day but she looks forward to these weekly visits. We have tried to get her moved nearer to us but unfortunately the council have told us it is a 20 yr waiting list, we are in London, we can't have her with us for various reasons. She is now 90yrs old and where she is is excellent, so I'm happy to keep the status quo.

I do miss my work I was an oncology nurse for 31years, and only left due to family commitments, I could have stayed on longer. I miss the patients and the young nurses, who kept me young also!

I know the GC will not need me forever, so for the time being I feel Blessed to be a big part of their lives.

Retirement what's that!!!

Still get up early ( I am one of nature's larks) still wear a watch, still rush around from activity to activity. The difference now is everything I do, I do because I enjoy it and want to do it and if anything does become too demanding or unreasonable, I give it up and do something else.

DGC live 200 miles away so we have no ongoing childcare responsibilities, although we do try to kidnap DGC for part of every holiday for some quality time together.

I jumped ship from the NHS when I was 55 and qualified for early retirement. My husband was about to retire from the navy at 60 at the same time. I don't get the state pension for another 9 or so years, but luckily with my NHS pension and my husbands we are well enough off ... we also have more available as my husband has various other pensions, shares etc sitting there earning interest and growing! No financial worries for about the first time in my life.

Anyway, much as we love our retirement it's not really turned out as we imagined. Two months into it we gained our lovely wee granddaughter prematurely, this made us firm up arrangements to move to the same town in case there were problems with her that required our assistance.
While she is generally fine with no apparent long-term problems we find that we are very frequent baby-sitters and dinner makers/suppliers whenever the daughter and granddaughter drop in.

We do love that we see so much of her and that she is growing up knowing us well, its certainly put paid to our ideal of going away on frequent wee holidays if we happened across a good deal.
With us being the only babysitters we feel we have to give reasonable notice of any holidays ... even this has been disregarded by SIL as his job pays more than DD's so he takes shifts (he is a freelancer) anyway leaving poor DD high and dry when it comes to her (lesser!) job! Makes us feel guilty for taking a holiday.

Oh, and I no longer wear a watch!

my DH and myself work full time ..we're 62 and 67..we both like our jobs..I was made redundant last year and tho terrified of interviews got another one!..we have 5 small GC and up till last year a 92 yr mum with dementia..work, then, gave me somewhere where I was treated as an individual, and I could leave the pressure of family responsibility behind. I would like to think we will retire soon and feel very heartened that generally people's responses seem very positive. I liked the idea of the routine of work (we're all different) and have liked the getting up and being part of the workforce, meeting people for a laugh at work, etc.. but it seems life can be just as good retired!

It very much depends on your health and wealth doesn't it? I took 'early' retirement at 61 but arthritis meant that I couldn't possibly have managed to keep going until I was 66 when I get my state pension. My private pension has not amounted to anything like the amount I was promised so I'm afraid luxurious holidays are not on the cards at the moment! I love being able to see my 6 grandchildren more often but it is exhausting and juggling days out in between helping out with them and visiting my very demanding 89 year old father almost everyday is not easy! I almost (and it is only almost) wish that I could sometimes say 'No I can't do that I'm at work!'.

I doubt I will ever know the answer to this question as I can't see myself ever being able to afford retire....sighs a deep melancholy sigh...

Kazzer I am sorry you are lonely. Can you tell us more about your situation if you want to?

kazzer yes it can be lonely when you live by yourself and have no family (well mine are in America) I still prefer it to work though.

Our whole office was closed down and we were all made redundant - none of us had planned on giving up work in that way. I really missed the social aspect of work as we were a good crowd and all got on well. It is now 5 years down the line but we all try to meet up every couple of months for a meal out and to catch up on each other's news, which is great. I volunteer now 2 days a week and am kept busy with the grandchildren, which is lovely, but I do still miss the interaction of the office and the fact that you knew you were all going to have a laugh about something every day!

Oh, how I agree with my fellow gransnetters. Time, and more time, I love it. I have time for most things now without clock watching, though I still need to learn to say no a little more often. I am tending to say I can do that or go somewhere and then find I am rushing around. I use to work shifts and have found that adjustment has been difficult. My husband has been retired a year longer than I. I am just approaching my 2nd retired anniversary, and am just getting settled into this life. We are fortunate to have good pensions, mortgage paid and owners of a large motorhome. Just paid for ferry for the first of our 8 week journey around Europe. 2 more in the planning later in the year. Gone are the days of hurtling through France in a couple of days to be able to get 2 weeks, to hurtle back again. We have only been together 17 years as a couple so have had lass chances than some to enjoy our time together, and I find I focus on that, time together. My husband asked me once what I wanted and I replied that all I wanted was the time to be able to grow old with him. Thankfully I have that.

Love retirement. I am very busy, help with the grandchildren but made it clear from the start that I was not going to look after them every day, as much as I love them and, of course, I am always there in an emergency. I love the freedom to choose what I want to do. I have been blessed with good health and enough money to allow me to have regular holidays with H and others. Above all, it's getting up at a time that is natural to me. I was never an early bird and now wake up at my normal waking hour of about 7.30 - 8.00 am No more rushing, a cup of tea in bed. Love it. I have joined the WI, which incidentally is not only for retired women but we do so much and have so much fun together. I look out for new courses in the area, often free, and run by the University and am looking again at U3A to see what is on offer. Have a writers' holiday booked for July - a real treat. Retirement rocks!

Lonely

We are loving retirement..helped that we both retired together. Time to do what we want, when we want. Time to give to volunteering...my husband to school governorship and me taking on a guide dog puppy. Time to spend with grandchildren. Time to join an aqua aerobics group. Time for the garden. I could go on and on! Only slight down side is that me pension us very small and won't be able to get state one for another 6 years so we supplement from savings each month which is slightly worrying! Now...shall I go and have a nap, make a coffee or venture into the garden in the sun?!

I have never worked so hard in my life.
I do all my own house work and gardening - I didn't when I was working full time.
I help with my three grandchildren and also help my unmarried son if he needs it
I am a school Governor (20 years) now I'm retired I get volunteered for all sorts
I keep up with old colleagues from various different jobs and all my friends
We have travelled a great deal in our camper van around Europe and other trips.
I have cared for my mum who has since passed away
I write a lot - life story stuff mostly and poetry
I read a lot
I have taken up water colour painting
I swim once a week at least
I do all the household accounts - My husband used to do them - he's still partly working
I study short courses with the OU
I walk a lot - big labrador to exercise
I have painted all the rooms in our house and now need to start again at the beginning
I never get bored or run out of things to do - I do run out of day though
My attitude is whilst I can I will who knows what the future holds

I fully retired at 70 after having to retire from the Medical Centre at 60. So I took on a part time job, which I enjoyed , but whilst my health was good I wanted to enjoy my retirement. However, my dearest friend, who I'd known for thirty years and spent a lot of time with, including holidays, died unexpectedly. It was a terrible shock and eighteen months later still is. I've been totally bereft and awfully sad. My family have been wonderful but I needed to wallow in my grief before I got on with my life now. Which I have and so far I like being retired. I can go and see my DGDs when I feel like it and help out when needed.

I retired at 55, 25 years ago now! One of the first in Local Govt. service to get the early retirement package.
At first I missed work, the social side, and the professional, I loved my job and the whole lifestyle involved with it.
But we moved to a different part of the country, and a different community life, so it wasn't so traumatic. Also nearer to my parents. I was able to get a few part-time jobs similar to what I was doing before, so the transition was gradual.
Financially we were OK, I had a good pension, and husband had a decent income.
It must be hard for those whose health deteriorated - I've heard it said that it's work that keeps you going.

I retired at 64 from the NHS . My job was changing, with far less patient contact , difficult management and unacheivable targets. At the time I was unsure if I was doing the right thing ( playing into their hands - they wanted to disband my team) but I also needed to support my brother more with the care of my 91 year old mother. 18 months later I know the choice was right. I seem to have little free time though with helping to care for my mother and helping with the grandchildren. I am working one morning a week and loving it, my mother needs increasing care and another grandchild on the way! Financially we manage although I have only a small NHS pension ( I had 12 years out when I had the children) and my OH also lost out when he was made redundant from a building company who went bust .He retired 7 years before me and it took him a long time to adjust to having me at
home ! I no longer do big shops and I have more time to cook cheap meals, look for bargains and make do and mend . It's true it costs you to go to work -buying lunches, travel, work clothes and even paying for one's own
training . I meet my ex-work colleagues about every 3 months. They all moved on about the same time as me or retired, but not sure if it will continue for much longer as we have less and less in common and some have moved away. But I still have good friends locally and we meet and go out regularly. I have re- discovered the library and stopped buying books. Newspaper is just on Saturdays and free at Waitrose !
Big plans for the garden this year after having had an extension to the kitchen and I will enjoy having an unhurried breakfast in the sun . Yes all things considered, retirement was a good move ...

I felt fortunate to get early retirement on health grounds, less fortunate because of the significant health problems that made it possible. i'd planned to work another 2 years because I enjoyed work and it was the first time in our lives we had an income big enough to save a bit from. It wasn't to be, my husband accepted "voluntary redundancy" in the first round of cuts so we went from two reasonable incomes to pensions in the space of a few months. I'm not complaining, we have good occupational pensions and both had paid extra in to the fund, thankfully.

Health aside, I'm loving retirement. Within 6 months I'd gone from feeling a bit bereaved at leaving work without a wind down process, to being one of those (boring) folks who say their days are so full they don't know how they ever fitted work in.

The past year has seen two new grandchildren - it's wonderful not to have to fit work around them and to be able to respond to those "mum can you just…." requests. It's a great time of life, free of the demands of work, a slower pace of life and enough money to enjoy it. Feel very fortunate.

I'm free from workplace stress and bullying now. I can spend time for my church and a couple of charities, and I can spend time on myself. My income is a lot smaller, but so is the place I live in so that isn't a problem.

Pros: Nobody to tell you what to do, no early morning starts or late returns, no work stress, no tax returns and accountancy expenses, able to take holidays as often and as long as you want, time to enjoy grandchildren, able to go out in the sunshine at every opportunity, walks in the country, pub lunches, even keep an eye on workmen in the house. Have time to volunteer and 'put something back'. Time to join U3A and learn new things.

Cons: my income dropped to one fifth of what it was, which has meant a huge adjustment. I thought I would miss the daily office gossip, but if you volunteer, you get that to a degree. You are seen as a 24/7 available babysitter, but you learn to say the occasional 'no'.

Deteriorating health and the eventual outcome would happen whether you were working or not, when it comes to retirement I recommend it!

maryEJB no watch but my phone is usually in my pocket if I actually 'need' to know the time..

I stopped working at 58 because I could not thole my low paid job a moment longer and DH turned 65 and opted to take his state pension (with £50 per week added for me as a dependent) + v small private pension. An endowment Policy also paid out a good lump sum which we invested in a rental property. As neither of us had ever earned a lot we were used to living frugally and by the time my State and miniscule private pension arrived 2 years later we found ourselves with more income & less expenditure than when we were both working.

Those first two years were blissful - I redecorated the entire house, re-organised our big garden, to grow our fruit and veg, redecorated our rental flat, signed up for and passed two modules at the local Uni (just to prove I could) went on our one and only cruise and travelled across Canada. Meanwhile DH was winding down his business (joiner) while I rejoiced in issuing the last invoice and completing the final VAT return and Annual Accounts.

Then big changes - Both DDs bought old houses nearby, both had babies and went back to work, so DH was refurbishing their cottages and I became an almost full time Granny, especially when another DGC arrived and I was 'Granny to three'. Now that all 3 DGC are at school this commitment has reduced to a couple of school pick-ups per week and cover for school holidays.

Then more changes. DH had a nasty fall, followed by a complete collapse, (he was unable to walk unaided for a year and more) which has left him with a near useless arm and ongoing/increasing mental health problems, so my role in life is now mainly housebound 'full time carer', chief cook & bottle washer - responsible for all decisions, 'paperwork', household repairs and the garden. I have had to withdraw from my charitable and political voluntary work - now only able to contribute on-line. We have had to resort to paying tradesmen to do all the things DH used to do himself which we really cannot afford but have been lucky to share an unexpected legacy from my late ancient Uncle which is tiding us over.

"And forwards? tho' I canna see, I guess and fear".

I love it too and feel it's certainly one of the happiest times of my life. I think the secret is being busy with lots of interests. My husband and I are both busy every day and out most evenings at meetings. Rehearsals etc. i wouldnt want to be at home wondering how to fill my day.
We do get up later and don't always set the alarm but I'm amazed at people saying they don't wear watches! I sing, play in an orchestra, go to U3a French, walk, swim, read, edit the village Newsletter and lots more.
I think it's been harder for DH than me as work was so central to his life that at the time he had no outside interests. But he retired sort of gradually by doing part time consultancy work and gradually reducing the hours. He has now taken up golf, joined 2 orchestras, is Chairman of the Village Hall (effectively running most village activities) and is a school governor. With the result that between us it is hard to find time slots for holidays/travel!
But the beauty is that you don't HAVE to do any of these things- you can stop if you want to.
Oh and I forgot visiting/ babysitting for 6 grandchildren from time to time.

I didn't work out in the workplace but ran my own small business from home for many years. I have always felt very lucky to have been around all the time my children were at school. When I gave up the business, the release from stress was huge. No more clients expecting me to be on the end of the phone - brilliant. OH retired a few months ago and it has taken a bit of readjustment now that he is in the house during the day. I'm not at all used to the sharing of space. However, we have started to put new protocols into place. OH has joined a local committee, taken up upholstery classes and has joined a mens lunch club which meets from time to time, so we are beginning to have new routines. Also, we can travel when and for how long we want to which is such a change from the careful time planning that we used to have. And now, of course, OH can come with me when I go to visit the GPS - it is great to be able to share that with him. On the pension front, we are managing well, but One of OH's other duties is to look out for ways to save money; changing bank accounts; energy providers; mobile phones and etc. Amazing just how much was wasted simply because we didn't have time to analyse the outgoings.
All in all, retirement is fab!