Am I now Completely Mad ( longish post)

Go for it. Have a brilliant time.

grannylynn your story is familiar and how brave of you to open up . Our children can be wonderful or a trial in equal measures !! Go for it , you deserve to do this nice thing for yourself

You have done everything you can for your children to, by the sound of it, your own detriment. I know we as parents feel we have a responsibility to our off spring no matter how old they are or how much they depend on us, financially and emotionally. Go and have some 'me time' you deserve it. I hope that they appreciate that you need to take care of yourself sometimes.
Go have a fantastic time, live a little you deserve it.

You never know you might not want to come back. I've always wanted to stay.

Grannylynn, I think you have to do this. Well done for booking your holiday and have no more doubts about doing it. I have a sneaking suspicion you feel some guilt too, but you shouldn't. You've been a good mother, and your irresponsible son is a grown man who has chosen his own path all his life, and relies on you and the state to bail him out. I bet you wished he'd chosen another course, because our children remain our beloved children till the day we die, and it's hard, if not impossible to stop thinking about them. Your selfish son must have caused you many sleepless nights.

My philosophy on retiring is "It's my turn now" to live life and spend money in any way I choose.I hope you can adopt it too, and do your own thing without any guilt or worries, knowing you've done your best by your children. You can't take your money with you when you pop your clogs, so go for it and have fun!

Have a lovely time in India, and report back to us. I have felt very inspired to go there by the TV travelogues, and the Marigold Hotel films

As Riverwalk says, if it's a reasonable tour company you'll stay in amazing hotels. We went with Naturetrek (for the tigers and birds) and stayed in maharajah's palaces, beautiful lodges and modern hotels with wonderful facilities.

Where are you going? When are you going? Who are you touring with? Isn't it exiting?!

Good for you. Take medication for your tummy and off you go. our children need reminding every once in a while that 'we to have a life to live too'

GO! It's your time to live a little. You'll love India provided you accept it as it is. There is appalling poverty next to incredible wealth, animals living alongside people seemingly completely independently, rubbish and life lived in the open and very publicly, and traffic which makes London seem deserted. Despite all this everyone is non-judgemental open and smiley. It's wonderful! I hope you'll manage to see the Taj Mahal. It's mind-blowing! We loved it.
DH has a very tender difficult tummy and I have a garlic intolerance, but we didn't suffer any Delhi-belly. We were very careful to try to eat freshly cooked food. Because much of Indian food contains garlic I had a restricted diet - but there was so much choice it was fine and I was quite happy to live off the wonderful puddings!
Enjoy your trip!

grannylyn

Stop asking for permission.!!!

Go girl go.

Have a great time, savour every moment and when you get home I hope you find a further inner strength to say enough is enough, this is my time from this point onwards.

GO! GO! GO!

My son aged 37 has a drink problem, both he and his wife smoke weed day n night, social services have been called out more than once with regard to the two children. Today (believe it or not) they are taking over as landlord and landlady of a pub, probably funded by my mad elderly mother.

My husband died in 2007, the following year they opened a restaurant, which i helped to fund. Of course it didnt work out and he left the area owing thousands.

Anyway this isnt about me but just wanted to point out sometimes we can be so overwhelmed with love for our children we cant see we are neglecting ourselves and, to be totally honest, not making them stand on their own two feet.

Go to India, enjoy your life, I think you have done your bit

Totally agree with all comments grannylyn....don't you dare cancel.
Have a lovely holiday

Well done you, on all counts!

I'm not sure if you'll need any jabs before travelling, and maybe malaria pills???

Now go and have a fabulous time, despite the possible curry problem!

Happy holidays

Good for you enjoy every minute of your trip

What took you so long?

Go on your holiday grannylyn, it sounds wonderful and you have earned it.

Go for it. Have a brilliant time. It's your money. Enjoy it.

Hi grannylyn

You're worried in-case something happens, i:e eldest son dies,
and you'll spend the rest of your life blaming yourself. I can understand that I had a brother who died of drink and drugs when he was 21 and we all felt terribly for years after, but it happens, that's life.

The other posters say "If it was me.... ect", but its not them its YOU.

I don't know what I would do, I'm not in that situation and perhaps I wouldn't have giver a second thought to, but who knows.
Good luck on your soul searching, you will make the right decision.

Go for itGrannylynn It will be a wonderful experience. You deserve it 100%

Have a WONDERFUL time! You sound as if you deserve it. Only pity is you can't for longer . Try forget the pressures of home and enjoy every minute. It sounds like your son definitely needs to start taking responsibility for his own life - you have done plenty.

Grannylynn, do not cancel your holiday. You'd never forgive yourself, wondering what it might have been like. Have a great time and tell us all about it when you come back.

What an amazing thing to do, I am in awe of you! You must go, of course (though as another one with a permanent tummy problem, I'd be somewhat nervous of that particular destination ).
Have a fabulous time and come back and tell us all about it!

Go for it Grannylyn65 time for your son to take responsibility for himself, you have gone over and above.
Have a wonderful time and forget about home problems for a while. Just be cautious with food and water but enjoy

Good for you! We have booked to go to South Goa for three weeks in February. It will be our 11th time to India. I have found that the chef will make you anything you fancy even if it is not on the menu. I was in a beach shack and fancied egg and chips. I asked if it was possible and the Chinese chef made the chips in his wok and they were delicious.

I second what trisher has said. You deserve a " you time" holiday after all that you have done for your children. Don't think for a second, what if, just pack and go with all our good wishes. When we went to India, my DH was told that to drink, fast, a bottle of flat cola when he had an upset tum.

Just do it. If you don't spend your money now your kids will do it later. This my philosophy now, I have a SIL who doesn't work and has a cushy life, well he is not going to do it on my money when I am gone, what's left will go to a cat's home.