Birthday presents

I quite often use Amazon to get details about products, especially books, then I go to another site to buy them. I now buy books, which has always been my main purchase from Amazon, from Waterstones and many other products are available from ebay.

Materialistic, unimaginative, impersonal and certainly not the
way to educate our grandchildren IMHO. When I was little we made presents for relatives. I remember the joy of making and giving little posies of flowers, home-made peppermint creams and coloured bath salts. My mother made birthday cakes, gingerbread men etc, lovely pictures with pressed flowers and hand knitted sweaters, hats and scarves for children.
My GD loves wearing dresses so I made her two for her birthday in her favourite colours and style and I will continue to sew for her, arthritic fingers permitting, for as long as she wishes.
I'm all for shared experiences if possible as a previous poster mentioned.
I took my 5 year old grandson 10-pin bowling on his birthday.
Regarding birthday parties, the norm in this neck of the woods is to issue invitations with "No Gifts please but please donate to such and such a charity if you wish" and a donation box will be at the party. It works very well although a little present often presented as well. The birthday girl or boy chooses the charity.

Haven't read through all the posts, but you're talking about a "wish list," right, JackiBee? They're very common today. whether traditional "good manners" or not. I like them because it makes it easier for me to know what to buy. No "pleasure" for this lady in "looking for" a great gift if there's a great chance that the child won't enjoy it or the parents won't approve.

If the parents posted the actual list on fb, I would be aghast. But as long as they just give the link, I think that's ok. People like me, who are grateful for such lists will happily click it on (if we're planning to gift this particular 3-year-old). Those who don't like them or don't plan to get a gift can just ignore.

Also, of course, there's no obligation to buy from the list. People can still search for something else. Of course, a non-list gift might not be as much appreciated. That's a chance the person giving the gift has to decide if they want to take.

Mother's wishes or child's - I'll buy from the list every time!

I buy from Amazon because it's easy, I don't have to go out to the shops. Good selection, I get what I want quickly and usually at a better price, and delivered free. All good to my view.

I admit to buying most things from Amazon these days, despite not liking their ethics. It is not just a matter of them being cheap, but they sell such a variety of things and delivery is usually quick. For some time now I have been unable to get to the nearest town and even if I get a lift it is difficult to walk round the shops, so Amazon has been a lifeline for me.

Absooutely dreadful, butt if people actually ask what a child wants it can be useful to list a variety of things in different price ranges, together with the links to where these can be found. One of my daughters-in-law has always done this with her daughter and it works out very well, though she has been equally pleased when I have got her something different.

My DD keeps Amazon lists for them all so I usually get a few things from there, as I know they want/need them, and then some of my own choosing. I never buy them from Amazon as I really don't like their way of doing business - and they're always wrapped travelsafar.

we just give cash now adays as its difficult to keep up with what is the current requirement as GC get stuff all the time!!! On the plus side i dont have to trapse round shops looking for items i am usure about and i dont have to worry if buying on line that i have done something wrong and there is all the hassle of sending back. Win win as far as i am concerned. Just sad that children of today dont experience the thrill of the unknown that we had as small children of a gayily wrapped parcel to undo on their birthday or at christmas.

Ha, when my grandchildren were small I was referred to the Argos catalogue. I didn't oblige.

My DIL does this for my grandchildren, I think it's a great idea. The children decide what goes on the list and they get something they really like. My 23 year old grandson does it too, he's at university and this method insures he gets what he wants e.g books for his course or something else.
Another good thing is Amazon does gift wrapping and delivery to the recipient of the gift.Useful if you don't live nearby.

I think, it is rather insensitive and bad mannered. Some parents may have a limited budget and it is up to them to decide what they can afford. The focus of children's parties should not be about getting presents but about having fun.

Brilliant idea, no wasting time or money giving a duplicate present- or unwanted gift.

Three year old? Just go with a bottle of vodka and a packet of ciggies. That will make the 'pin the tail on the donkey' go with a swing.

I think it's a shame as it means the giver can't get that buzz of pleasure when the gift is a big hit.

Or the bump of disappointment when they realise the gift is totally unwanted.

There is a less offensive way of dealing with this for giver and receiver: The giver can call and ask parents or the child what their special interests are that year, and then either buy a suitable gift, or send the eqivalent amount of cash to put towards more expensive items. This is what I have done for my six grandchildren ranging in age from 15 years to 15 months. OK money is not very exciting, but for each of my grandchildren I find out the theme of their birthday treat and make a unique card to reflect that theme. I've done pirates, rugby, dinosaurs, dungeons etc. so the card is a little gift in itself and does not create the awkwardness of spending more than can realistically be afforded. Gifts should be graciously received not demanded on facebook!

Great idea!
Parents know what their children like (why buy a Thomas the Tank Engine when the child prefers Peppa Pig?), helps not to duplicate (one year my son aged 4 got ALL books for Christmas as he was an early reader - very disappointing) and helps give ideas together with budget.
And you don't have to stick to the list if you have a brilliant idea that parents haven't thought of.
Can't see any downsides myself. Wish Amazon had been around when my children were little, Instead it was the Argos catalogue...

My GS aged 10 when asked, said he would like Lego for his birthday, not knowing which sets he already had I asked him to send the links and told him my budget. He duly did this, I was able to choose a set myself in the safe knowledge that it wasn't a duplicate and it saved me a load of trailing around the shops. As for choosing for a 3 year old I think that's cheeky, as a previous poster said, that's what the mother wants, not what her child wants, indeed most 3 year old children want everything they see, for about 5 minutes!

Before Facebook my granddaughter aged around 5 taught herself to read more effectively with the help of the Argos Catalogue. She painstakingly copied out items she wanted for Christmas - with page numbers!

Argos and Amazon are a great encouragement to literacy amongst the young

Eminently ignorable!

CAN'T :-)

Never have liked Facebook. Why cant they send it by text or by email? I do not think lists should be written myself anyway. Children should be happy they get anything these days with everything costing so much, but then I suppose you could say if you get what they would like then it is better than buying something they already have or do not need. Making sure that they send a thank you of course. I agree with kooklafan, you do not need to shop with Amazon if you can get the same thing cheaper elsewhere.

I'm happy to get an Amazon list for all my grandchildren,usually via What's App with photo. I can buy and get them delivered straight to their home if i'm not going to see them soon. Brilliant!

Don't understand the problem. After all, it's only an electronic equivalent of the hand-written wishlist children used to write to Santa at Christmas time, then perhaps post up the chimney... but not before it had been checked by Mum and Dad. Why on earth are some people "horrified" just because it's been brought up to date? Strange... I'm grateful for the steer, as at least it gives me confidence that I'll be giving a present which is actually wanted and is not duplicated.

Why are so many jumping to the conclusion it's greedy, how the heck do we know they weren't a list of very acceptably priced items I ve never put a list or seen a list on FB that doesn't sound right but I ve always asked for a list of wants because unless you're with them everyday and see their play cupboard regularly (and even if you do see them regularly) they can change in a microsecond it can be Little Mix one minute and hate them the next. It's sensible to ask for a list why would you want to waste money I ve see prospective presents when out with the grandkids that I believe theyll love only to be told ugh don't like that any more etc
It's practical, and sensible why would you make a pretty cardi when the kid is dying for a pink unicorn with purple hair.....I don't like the idea of posting it on FB though that I think is a step too far and does take you into the realms of materialism but a personal list to close family members make sense

So I guess I m a yes and no person on this question

I always ask the parents what they would like for the children, that way we get what the children need/want for birthdays and Christmas. Any other gifts or holiday gifts we buy what we think they would like.
I think posting a gift list on Facebook is in rather poor taste. I prefer to ask what the children would like and the parents tend to give us several options, but we do settle on one thing and tell the parents so we don't double up with the other grandparents.