Is my son being naive????

trisher: No anomalies at all. Told exactly as experienced.

Yes some of the more expensive areas in my city cater to more wealthy students too, but not all students, in fact very few in my experience, (Ive sent 4 children to uni, and have 6 nieces and nephews all who lived in poorer parts of cities when they were at uni.)So that wasn't an assumption, it is a fact.
There is an on going problem with drug arrests and prostitution in SOME of the streets within this area, also I'm afraid a fact.
The way I described the women wasn't with a head scarf or veil. She was dressed head and body with the traditional outer garment (my apologies for not knowing the correct name)worn by muslim women. This also is a fact.
I didn't say the parking ticket was SOLD. All I know is each house is issued FREE tickets and she offered him her extra ones..fact.
Yes a young man who sits with beggars IS liable to be set upon, that I can agree with.

But your missing the point.

The reason he sat with the beggar was to HELP protect him by being there! Have you met many people begging in the street.....can you categorically vouch that they would ATTACK someone who is spending time with them?

There are a lot of 'anomalies, assumptions, presumptions, and mis representations in your post. It sounds as if you are biased and I wonder why?

Gosh! sorry to say this folks, but its not very welcoming here is it?

Why?

MawBroon: Have you read the other posts on this thread?

Mmm. So many anomalies in this post. Firstly the assumption that students live in dodgy areas, as someone living in a city where students are a huge part of the economy I know that isn't true. They tend to live in rather nice areas and are mostly well off. Secondly that areas with lots of different nationalities are also centres for drugs and prostitution and thirdly that a woman with her head covered must be a muslim. And lastly that the woman was able to offer free parking tickets in a parking permit area. I always assumed that parking permits were sold to residents in the street, so presumably the son would already have a permit and the woman would only have the one for her house?
I'd also be very worried about a young man who sits up all night with a beggar 'to keep them company' he is liable to be set upon and beaten by the beggar for interfering with his collecting.

Merlotgran: Who said anything about gullible? Gullible over what?

Who said 'old biddies'? You don't know how old I am.

Seems you've jumped to a few conclusions.

Ahhh sorry no can do, if you want YOU can take your own advice though, and post on ANY thread you choose
.......and yet you come back here!

Go away, Namsnanny. If you think we're a bunch of gullible old biddies then you're the one who is naive.

For a (I assume) new poster Namsnanny you seem extraordinarily aggressive. if you can't stand the heat etc etc.
It is a pretty weird scenario to ask totally unknown people how a young (?) man they have never met should behave when (apparently) being chatted up but a (traditional?) Muslim girl.
Is he not able to judge for himself?
You say it is a dodgy area, that speaks for itself. Selling parking permits is illegal -what does that say about the scenario?
Finally, you ask for opinions.
You get them
What is your problem?

Oh dear, Oh dear, Oh dear, Please Please ladies, If you don't like the heat get out of the kitchen.

Plenty more threads for you to play in.

I had hoped for some GENUINE sensible conversations.

I reiterate......I'm reaching out for CONSTRUCTIVE opinions

NOT argumentative tittle tattle.

Thank you all those who tried.

Put the cultural issue aside, it is a red herring. The issue is that a woman approaches an unknown man in the street offers to do him a favour and then invites him into her house.

Any woman who cannot see the problem and dangers in doing that is either mentally ill or doing it, with accomplices, to commit some kind of crime and much the same can apply to the man. He is either blinded by the possibility of free sex, mentally ill or too vulnerable to be living away from home or without social services support.

*Namsnanny says my adult children live a very 'peace and love' life style, and find any negativity oppressive.
I am sorry that does not wash. Is she really saying that when her children were small she brought them up so that they had no idea that there was anybody in the world who might harm them?
How can any parent be so irresponsible as to place her children in such danger.

My only response now is that she is reaping where she has sown. If her son wants to walk into the lion's den let him, but if he ends up with his head bitten off she will only have herself to blame. A peace and love lifestyle without negativity doesn't need to mean a life devoid of common sense.

Anniback: Chill out, your pi skills are showing! This is the first time ive posted HERE, but if you don't believe or like this post then you wont believe anything I say will you? Just find another post you prefer. Easy peasy

And you have never posted before? You are far more confident than I was when I first posted,and for quite a few which followed .

Anniebach: Sorry you feel that way, but surely the way to handle this thread if you truly don't believe me is to just.........STAY AWAY!!

Jacksmum: Thanks for the reply. I should like very much to chat to him, but maybe its difficult for others to understand this, my adult children live a very 'peace and love' life style, and find any negativity oppressive.

Please everyone this post IS genuine!

If this is an honest post then i think you should have a good chat with your son , this girl may have struck a blow for her Independence but does her family agree ??

Sorry, but not comfortable with this post ,

Deedaa: Thanks, yes my view entirely! I think my son feels this girl has struck a blow for her independence and should be supported.....not the view I would take.

Now though, how to persuade him I'm concerned for her and his welfare and not a sour old puss who doesn't trust people from another culture!!

I have invited random strangers into my home in the past Namsnanny and lived to tell the tale, but this seems dodgy to me. First the parking tickets and then the tea. If she is really just being friendly I would expect a bit of chat before any invitations. It's lovely to take people at face value but you can be too trusting.

Thanks for your replies, but I can assure you nothing I have written is untrue!!!!

Rinouchka: This happened.......You seem to be well versed in the Muslim faith, do you know any Muslim people yourself, maybe you could help me out by asking them for their opinion? Thanks.

Merlotgran: Nothing fishy at all....I was hoping to get some genuine points of view, not silliness, but I guess that IS your point of view.

MOnica: Yes I'd love to drag him back home but he's a little too old for that now, even though he sounds very young, I think that's why I used the word naïve!

Charleygirl, mimiro, Anniebach, Norah, Thanks for the replies, in the round they reflect the feeling I had.

Girls, I've never posted before, and I must say I expected a..........'different' reception.

What a strange post and totally impossible circumstance. No young Muslim woman would invite a complete male stranger to her house for tea or even talk to him. This is an imagined tale...and not a very good one at that!

You may be right. But if they posted hoping to engender any kind of culturally prejudice they have been disappointed.

And me...

I agree merlogran.

I think there might be something fishy about this post?

I would be wary of anyone whom I did not know who approached me in the street, offered me some incentive and then invited me into their home. That wariness would apply even in the nice low crime village I live in.

In an urban area, I would run a mile, completely regardless of the ethnic, religious or social status of the unknown woman. Chat to someone in the street or in the corner shop or supermarket queue and build a relationship, but be very wary of someone unknown coming up to you in the street, offering you some incentive and immediately inviting you home. It cannot be for an honest purpose. He could be being set-up for robbery, physical attack, assault accusations and blackmail.

Would any woman, regardless of background, walk up to an unknown man on the street, offer incentives and an invitation home if it was not with criminal intent and she knew there were
other people in the house to be with her? She would be making herself vulnerable to assault and rape and would know that.

Namsnanny how old is your son and how long has he lived in this area? I find it difficult to believe that any person old or young capable of living independently could be gullible enough to believe that this invitation was purely one of neighbourhood friendship.

Wasn't he ever warned about the dangers of going off with strangers as a child and that dangerous strangers do not necessarily look dangerous? I think he should be returning home as soon as possible until he has learnt some common sense and sense of self preservation..