Just an old wive's tale?

to everyone who has lost a precious little one. As Mawbroon said... never goes away, does it?

We ordered our pram for our firstborn in 1971 and the shop refused to deliver it until after the baby was born. Nothing to do with bad luck or old wives tales, but, as they explained,should something go wrong they couldn't take it back once delivered.

I always used to believe that news of a pregnancy should be saved until after the 'safe' 12 weeks. As my first grandson was stillborn at 40 weeks this idea now holds no water. I carried my children with no problems but do now realise how fortunate I was. Prams. Matinee jackets. Etc etc. What will be will be, regardless of superstition.

paddyann

I gave my pram away when my daughter outgrew it and my son wasn't born until ten years later so he had a new pram too.In fact both were treated as "first" babies and neither were ,I lost one of twins in december 1976 and carried the other twin until the May of 77 when she also died .Baby three is generally believed to be our first by people who met us after she was born and we didn't correct that as people tend not to know how to react ,only close family and friends know about the losses ...and now Grans on here

I know this thread has been a mixture of serious and funny, so I would just like to send to all of those who lost babies, so many of you.

So if it is an OWT about the pram in the house, that's all very well when it's the first baby. But what about the 2nd or 3rd, etc. and you still had your pram from the first one? Or was that rare because someone else would have borrowed it in the meantime?

Imo, the only luck we have is the luck we make. So I don't believe in things like it's bad luck to have the pram in the house before baby comes, etc. However, if God forbid, baby was still born or anything like that, seeing the pram in the house would probably hurt. So maybe better not to have it there. I took my chances with this when I had dd, but I understand and respect it if some people just don't feel comfortable, whether for superstitious reasons or whatever.

I'm sorry dd is putting everyone to all this trouble though. But it's very kind and understanding of you to do so.

Hope all goes well and baby is healthy and happy!

DD bought her pram in Mothercare in the sale, delivered very quickly so it was taken straight round to her Mil's & only brought back just before DD was going into Hospital to be induced. These days they have to have the appropriate baby/car seat before they are allowed to leave Hospital. My DD is 36 so it's not just "Old Wives" that still believe in these OWTs.

My MiL did a lot of knitting for me, blue, white, lemon & pale green but not pink until DD was born. I also remember older members of the family & older friends giving my DD a silver coin.

Smithy I think its commonsense not to have too much baby stuff,after our first daughter died in her 4th day we gave everything away ,except a wee pram toy that I still have 40 years later.When daughter 2 was born I didn't even have a nnappy or a nightgown for her,My husband and my sister did a frnatic dash round mothercare the day before we came hom and got everything on my list .I had 4 further miscarriages and when pregnant with my son I waited until I was over 24 weeks before even ordering my pram...baby was born at 28 weeks ,spent his first 11 weeks in SCBU and pram was delivered when he came home one week before he was due

Smithy you cannot dismiss something as an OWT or superstition and then say "It makes sense not to tempt fate"!!!
Old wives' tales are things like your face freezing in a grimace if the wind changes, "ne'er cast a clout till May be out" , but this thread seems to have got fixated on the superstition about babies and prams and the frankly outdated "cleansing" connotation of churching which I think many of us would wish to distance from the modern rite of thanksgiving after childbirth.
Of course there are those who dismiss all religion as superstition, but that, as they say, is another story.

I had my son before marriage in the late sixties and the Catholic priest insisted I was chuched after the baptism to ''cleanse'' me! He made me feel like a leper and I have never practised catholicism since. The pram superstition is an OWT but makes sense really not to tempt fate.

OWTs and superstitions are part of our cultural heritage. They're interesting/amusing and harmless as long as you take them with a pinch of salt. I throw spilt salt over my left shoulder into the eye of the devil even though I don't believe he's really behind me. On the other hand it might be bad luck if you walk under a ladder when someone drops a hammer.

Churching is a different thing to OWTs and superstitions. If someone believes in God and wants to give thanks giving for the birth of their child then I don't see the problem. The practice of religion is a personal choice based on faith and belief. It's not for others to disrespect such choices.

Thank you TriciaF very kind of you, also to Maw.

Yes, it is of course an OWT if regarded as a bad luck omen ( pram in the house)
But you can see the reality of what it comes from, not all pregnancies have a happy ending, even nowadays, and this 'omen' comes from further back in time when it was actually quite on the cards that something woukd happen, either to the baby or the Mother, sometimes both.

As far as I remember, it was only the protestants that insisted that the mother's first outing should be to be churched. I don't think either ministers or priests encouraged the idea.
The pram superstition was common in the west of Scotland in the 1950s and later. I never understood why it was only the pram and not everything you needed.

All those who have lost babies know how devasting it was and disposing of baby clothes, pram, cradle etc was and is, I am sure, just as bad as disposing of clothes after a loved one's funeral.
It is really nonsense to believe these superstitions, but most of us cling to one or two.

Juney - so many sad stories on here, you, and Maw, Swanny, Roses, Downto earth - hope I haven't missed anyone?. condolences to all of you.
My firstborn nearly died at birth too, but TG he survived. I should give thanks every day for him, and the others. And thanks for the improved medical care during and at childbirth since then.

I did most of the above - churching, silver coin, no pram in the house before baby but my little boy still died when he was six days.

I think these are exactly as described by some - OWT. However, if some people draw comfort from them, what's the harm.

Absolute and complete ignorant rubbish!!!for goodness sake this is 21st Century!!

My Mum was churched after each of us in the 40s and 50s as her MiL wouldn't have her in the house until she was! Lovely lady, my Nan!

I was aware that years ago the 'churching' of women was to purify them after childbirth but think that was mainly a CofE or RC practce I was a Methodist when my children were born in the 60s and 70s so it didn'-t apply.

I certainly didn't have the pram in the house before my first son was born but kept it for the 2nd and 3rd, getting another for the last two. When my daughter was expecting twins we got a second hand pram in readiness. Sadly she miscarried and when she returned from hospital her brother had put it in the loft so she wasn't even more distressed. It stayed there until a friend who was expecting twins bought it from us.

Paddyann Snap!
I was too was born in Glasgow, mid fifties and christened within a week. I have lent the family shawl lots of times, everyone returned it. However, I am still waiting for DIL to return it from a year ago.
I too never had a pram in the hose before birth. I just didn't want to tempt fate.

Oh and I never had a pram in the house before the baby arrived,they were delivered the day after we came home from hospital

I was born in Glasgow in the mid fifties and we were all baptised at one week old as my catholic family wouldn't have taken us out without us being baptised my mother was churched at the same time.We used to hand a christening piece for luck to the first person of the opposite sex we met on our way to church,two biscuits sandwiched with butter icing and with a silver coin in the centre for luck nicely wrapped,now its a 2 pond coin ,then it was half crown .We did it with our grandchildren too .Its nice to hold onto old traditions,we all wore christening veils and they seem to have disappeared.The one I used was mine from when I was christened and I lent it to a neighbour who never returnned it so I got a new one handmade in Ireland for the GC ,their christening robe was my husbands family robe as my linen one went AWOL with the veil

Oh , how awful schnakie! But nothing to do with the shoes!

I am not familiar with this OWT, but having moved to England from the US in the 1990's, I became engaged to marry a man in the early 2000's. I was teaching nursery nurses in a college at the time and had found the perfect pair of wedding shoes on a lunch time run. Bringing the shoes back to work and placing them on my desk to show my students, I was met with shrieks and shouts of "Don't put new shoes on the table!!!" Well, I was duly informed of the bad luck it would bring and it was proven when 3 months later, the man broke it off with me - on the morning of the wedding day!!

Practically everything we had for our first was second hand.
We took what was offered when it was offered and had to store it ourselves.
I didn't know about the old wives tale regarding the pram.
Our baby was born safely, but if I had known the old wives tale and things had gone wrong, would we have had to blame ourselves because we had a pram in the house? Would others have blames us?
It doesn't bear thinking about.