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New Kitchen Phobia

(110 Posts)
Iluvcruz Fri 22-Sep-17 20:41:24

Probably not the correct term, but I seem to have a psychological problem when it comes to deciding on my new kitchen.

Basically, I've waited over 30 years for a new kitchen (bringing up chikdren, limited funds, reluctant husband all contributed to delay). I am a very patient person (although dh would say I have "banged on about it" for 30 years) and have made do with mismatched shabby (NOT as in shabby chic) units (did once change the worktop and purchase an early range cooker (25 years ago)) and had an American Fridge freezer (same time frame - now defunct).

During this time I have scoured interior mags and kitchen brochures planning my dream kitchen. In the 80s I longed for a mahogany Edwardian kitchen with Laura Ashley accessories; the 90s saw me drawn to beech wood whilst in the noughties I favoured all out contemporary white gloss - all with obligatory island and breakfast bar.

Now we have both taken early retirement we have agreed now is the time. I fell in love with a Neptune hand painted wooden semi-bespoke kitchen which was coming out at around £35k. Dh nearly had a coronary and encouraged me to be more realistic (even though I had ringfenced this money)! Our builder is also a friend and both he and dh are pushing me towards a Howdens kitchen. Problem is I don't like the quality or the door colours. We are now in position of having ripped everything out bar the cooker and sink and work begins in earnest in two weeks. However I can't find a design I like (apparently kitchen too small for my beloved island, we have a couple of doors leading off limiting options, dh and builder hate bin drawers so that's out. Dh doesn't want any structural work done (walls knocked down/chimney breast knocked into - "can of worms)hmm. So I am feeling pressured to accept a kitchen I don't like because of timescales. We got several doors from Howdens today and none of the colours look right. I'm not usually a doormat but do compromise quite a bit. It doesn't help that dh doesn't really place any value on aesthetics.

I keep getting anxiety attacks about it and feel on verge of tears all the time and extremely depressed. I seriously think I am having some sort of "episode" linked to the fact that I have actually spent half my life planning the damn thing.

Any words of wisdom or comfort?

GrandmaMoira Wed 04-Dec-19 16:07:24

I've found many builders will only work with the company they have an agreement with so if your builder likes Howdens you may have to find another builder. I found my Howdens kitchen good quality but did not like their system of giving the prices and design only to the builder and disliked their salesmen who did the design so would not recommend them.
Now I have moved there are several small kitchen design shops in the area so plan to use one of those when redoing my kitchen. They will provide the builder as my experience is that finding a good builder is a nightmare.

jhonmiller Wed 04-Dec-19 15:10:40

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granfromafar Fri 17-May-19 09:17:22

Iluvcruz: Have come to this thread rather late and assume you may have had your kitchen done by now. However, for anyone interested, Burnhill Kitchens in Tonbridge are excellent. Used them 2 years ago and was very impressed with them. They are a well-established family business. Have pmd you.

jeanie99 Fri 17-May-19 02:56:25

OK
My thinking is have the kitchen you want and to hell with what the builder thinks. Why does he have any say in it anyway.
Obviously you need to consider hubby thoughts but hey who spends most time in the kitchen anyway?
One of the main things is the layout, you need to get that right and only the person who uses the kitchen knows what they need.
Most people now go for the white high gloss drawers (instead of cupboards) DIL and friend have just had this type fitted.
I on the other hand have cream painted doors, all the appliances where I wanted them installed (not what the kitchen designer planned).
I love my kitchen it's the last I'll have, everything is where I wanted it and it works for me.
Best of luck and dig your feet in and get what you want.
If you have the money what is the problem, life can be short enjoy while you're here.

M0nica Thu 16-May-19 20:38:16

From the sound of it your DH is not renowned for the time he spends in the kitchen cooking. You are the family chief cook and bottle washer.

In that case, you have the kitchen you want, not what your DH wants. If you want drawers, have drawers and so on with every other features.

Over the years we have fitted 5 kitchens and worked closely with DD on a kitchen she fitted. These kitchens have come variously from a local builders merchant, Wickes, B&Q(x2) Magnet, and John Lewis of Hungerford, and there was very little to choose between them for durability and wear.

We are now in the market for a new kitchen again and we are looking at a company called DIY Kitchens www.diy-kitchens.comwho have a huge showroom on the outskirts of Doncaster. There prices compare with Howdens and similar companies. Well worth a visit if you can manage it

We have been there three times, but our new kitchen is dependent on planning consent for an extension, and as our house is listed and we are on our third attempt to find one, that satisfies the Conservation Officer and is within budget. So, I have chosen kitchens three times for three different extentions and hope I will get it one day.

humptydumpty Thu 16-May-19 11:15:29

That's great news, trisher - I'm going to look at the Ikea website straight away!

trisher Thu 16-May-19 11:00:20

humptydumpty had my small galley type kitchen redone for only the second time after 35years in the house last year. We went to Ikea and first used their planning tool to decide where to put things. It advised us to only cupboard and unit on one side. Made so much difference. Youngest son fitted it and it came in at less than 1K including the smallest ever dishwasher. Advise anyone to have a look at Ikea and experiment with their planner.

humptydumpty Thu 16-May-19 10:48:08

Hi all. First Tegan2 I concur about Wren - no experience of their kitchens but a colleague and I both bought free-standing bedroom furniture from them, a series of problems with every aspect of the purchase for both of us!

Back to kitchens; I live in a v small maisonette; galley kitchen is next to living room, which is very dark. Kitchen hasn't been updated since it was built in 1960 so v shabby and all fre--standing and wasting space. What I would really like is to knock a hole/serving hatch between the 2 rooms, to let some of the natural light from the kitchen into the lving room. All units and appliances would need replacing.

My main concern after reading this thread is the cost! I was thinking more along the lines of 5K than 35K! (that's more than my total savings!) Do you think replacing the kitchen, even without doing anything to the wall, would be feasible for that amount?

Robi880 Thu 16-May-19 09:27:36

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Robi880 Thu 16-May-19 09:21:51

fff

BlueBelle Thu 08-Feb-18 18:33:04

I sorted my kitchen out when I moved in this house 1983 it’s still going strong nothing needs changing ( well I ve had a new washing machine and fridge freezer in that time of course ) but the basics stay the same well I ve painted the walls and had a new lampshade ?

Tegan2 Thu 08-Feb-18 18:17:50

A friend of a friend has had no end of problems with theirs and the company haven't been helpful at all. Then there was a thread on another forum about companies to avoid and Wren was mentioned. I have no experience of them myself, though. I think a lot of these companies subcontract the work so it depends on the people they subcontract to, I always think a local, recommended joiner is the best person to use.

Smithy Thu 08-Feb-18 18:13:17

Tegan2, a friend's daughter has just had a Wren kitchen installed band ius delighted with it. Your warning has put me off though, I'm still looking.

ginny Thu 08-Feb-18 17:57:14

A few things that occurred to me reading you op.
Who uses the kitchen?
The builder is paid to do what you want him/ her to do.
Bin drawers are the best thing some much easier to store pots and pans.
Had my kitchen done last year after waiting years and if you have waited that long have what you really want. No point in going from one you don’t like to another you don’t like.

Jalima1108 Thu 08-Feb-18 17:42:16

You called it my new kitchen Ilovecruz so I presume you are the one who spends most time in there.

So have what you want and what suits you, as Amma says, it will probably be in your house for, well, for a long time, if not for ever!

Amma54 Thu 08-Feb-18 17:05:40

You can get ex-showroom kitchens for a good price. I had one once, absolutely fine. You don't get to choose the colours etc, as you take what's there, but if it's the right thing then it's a good bargain.

I concur about not having something you dislike. It will probably be in your house for ever and every time you look at it you'll hate it. Though I do agree the £35k is over the top. It's your (family's) kitchen so it has to suit you, not a salesman or builder.

M0nica Thu 08-Feb-18 16:10:27

grannycakes you have recommended the same company I was about to recommend. We are planning a new kitchen and I had Howdens in mind but then DH found DIY kitchens.

We visited their showrooms on the outskirts of Doncaster and were blown away not just by the range of kitchens available but their very nice and helpful but unpushy staff. We are due to make a second visit to make the final decision about the kitchen we want in a week or two's time.

Tegan2 Thu 08-Feb-18 16:08:54

grin...

Jalima1108 Thu 08-Feb-18 16:05:06

Me neither!
I used to be indecisive, now I'm not so sure. It's because I can't make up my mind that I am stuck with my old kitchen. However, if we ripped it out .....

Tegan2 Thu 08-Feb-18 16:03:12

Whatever you do, don't use Wren; I've heard terrible reports about them. As for choosing anything these days, I find it impossible as everything I've done to my house over the past few years I've hated.

Jalima1108 Thu 08-Feb-18 15:16:02

This house was built in 1990 ,that kitchen style has long gone
grin

Jalima1108 Thu 08-Feb-18 15:14:24

I live in house built in 1980 and still have the same kitchen. Thank goodness MargaretX - someone who has a kitchen just a bit older than mine grin

Jalima1108 Thu 08-Feb-18 15:07:53

a something and cooke one. Cooke and Lewis I think and I like the rounded end cupboards, that's what I would choose

Jalima1108 Thu 08-Feb-18 15:04:13

I was told by my neighbour that Howdens do two ranges, she chose one for her kitchen and a cheaper one which looked the same for the linking utility room.

I've always ended up compromising Iluvcruz - I would love a new kitchen (everything, floor, the lot) but can't face the upheaval and don't want to spend that much as I'd rather spend my savings on "going places". But I sm probably older than you anyway and savings can't be added to these days.

Are there any kitchen firms local to you - they would come and give you a price.

Jacky I got round the inconvenience by keeping everything in them in plastic boxes that I just have to take out, so that nothing gets forgotten at the back. I've done that with very large plastic boxes which works just fine but would still love to have a pull-out larder unit and swivel carousels - plus good deep drawers to store china, pans etc instead of lots of cupboards.

Brigidsdaughter Thu 08-Feb-18 14:36:55

Hi Iluvcruz
How did it go.

I'm now all over place in my head 're new kitchen. First one ever and probably the last.

North facing too.

Going with County Kitchens Esher. Sigma3 kitchens. Cost £18k excluding rip out, plastering and floor. Having paid deposit now my indecisive side rules. Want neutral but my favourites light Blue (looks more aqua or misty) and heritage grey (beige). It will be all over in April, thankfully.
Would love to know your colour choices. I'm going for Corian too but still flummoxed with limited choice. Quartz is stunningbut I'd like a seamless upstand.
Bd