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How do I stick to me regime

(70 Posts)
Serkeen Sun 17-Dec-17 21:28:53

I have put on weight recently

I eat to help deal with my emotions.

It has gotten out of hand were I am binge eating

I could give you an example of what I ate today but too ashamed if I am honest.

I would be so grateful for any advice as to HOW to stay focused on track and to my healthy eating habits.

Have tried

giving myself a reason to do it does not work
gone to weight watchers does not work

If anyone has some real solid advice I would love to hear it, maybe something that has worked for you and kept you consistent with the healthy regime.

I so look forward to your replies smile

BBbevan Mon 18-Dec-17 10:11:17

Like you Serkeen I comfort ate. A bit of chocolate here, 2 biscuits there etc. I put on weight but not enough to make me worry. Then I had a big shock. I was diagnosed diabetic, but no symptoms. I was mortified and vowed to reverse it. I am glad to say I have.
So please don't go down that route. It is easy to do so and difficult to reverse. Read all the excellent advice on here. The 16:8 diet is excellent and relatively easy and I would recommend it.

Jaycee5 Mon 18-Dec-17 10:14:54

It is very difficult to stop eating if you are doing it during a difficult time emotionally. I think that you have to concentrate on the problems that are causing you to overeat rather than that itself.
I do it myself and the only thing that really works for me is to lose weight when I can but I understand the feeling of annoyance with yourself that you have. I got really uncomfortable and hated catching sight of myself in shop windows. I managed to go down a size but I really need to go down another one.
Don't let it be another thing to worry about. Is there anything else that you find comforting that could replace it? Instead of immediately getting up to eat you could think 'I'm going to eat something after I have a bath/do the washing/finish a chapter of my book etc.' Sometimes delaying things means you forget it or will at least have cut out one biscuit.
For me, the best time to control my eating patterns is when I am shopping. Buy a punnet of grapes rather than a packet of biscuits. Buy things like carrots and cut them into strips (even if you need a dip to eat them with - but buy a small tub). You won't want the grapes when you want a biscuit but will reach for them if they are the only choice and then get use to eating them as a snack.
I also find that St.John's Wort helps when I am sliding into depression although I haven't found anything that helps anxiety except to avoid anything that makes me anxious as much as I can.
I can really only empathise. Don't think of it as failure. You will overcome it when you are emotionally strong enough.

vickya Mon 18-Dec-17 10:16:29

Serkeen I was overweight most of my life. By age 60 I was one pound under 19 stones, size 38 skirt. I went to Slimming World and lost 3 stones and decided to do it myself and not have to pay weekly. I began to gain again! The weekly weigh in and advice and chat and encouragement was what did it.

I then began Weightwatchers and have been going ever since. I lost 8.5 stones and have been maintaining as a gold member, able to go to meetings free, since 2008, apart from a blip after an operation and broken arm, when I stopped going and thought I'd wait and go back when I was gold again and could go free. But began to gain more, went back and lost it. I go weekly and if I gain a few pounds that is find as I am well under goal.

The way of counting points there has changed 3 or 4 times over the years but the basic idea is eat healthily and try and get some exercise smile. Healthy and filling is the way to choose food. I eat lots of things I like but choose carefully so I make up for all-out splurges with a week or two of careful eating. WW really does work.

DeeWBW Mon 18-Dec-17 10:17:06

Hi Serkeen,

Maybe the best place to start is to find out what the negative emotions are about. You need to deal with the cause, before you can handle you reactions,w which is coming out in the form of having less care for yourself.

The best of luck.

vickya Mon 18-Dec-17 10:18:15

that was 28, not 38 skirt

icanhandthemback Mon 18-Dec-17 10:18:24

I feel your pain. I struggle with binge eating and often joke about being semi bulimic because I don't do the vomiting bit. In reality though, it is not a joke and the disgust I feel with myself afterwards makes me feel wretched which often makes me binge again. In order to break the cycle, like an alcoholic, I have to hit rock bottom before I can get a grip and rein it in again. I have no idea why I can be so controlled sometimes and so stupid others. If you find the answer, can you let me know? I've done some CBT and every 'eating plan' known to man but somehow falling off the wagon beckons constantly. I've been at Slimming World since April but unless I am very careful, I find that things slip away from me especially at this time of the year. My GP knows my struggles but doesn't know how to help. Time to Talk don't deal with eating disorders and all other services only seem to kick in if you are seriously underweight or overweight.

patriciageegee Mon 18-Dec-17 10:28:08

Serkeen as radicalnan says, please don't be afraid of hypnotherapy. I had treatment for emotional issues and it really REALLY helped me and it is so far removed from the "one two three deeper deeper" image of hypnosis. I was apprehensive of the possible loss of control during sessions but I always felt in a safe space and totally respected. It also helped my brother with a deeply ingrained fear of flying and he now loves jetting off whenever he can. Please give it a go.

Omaoma57 Mon 18-Dec-17 10:42:06

Dearest Serkeen, feel for you as i too have always had a problem with food, emotions and in my 60 after trying every diet known to man and women...tried low carb high fat and it is working. I have ditched nearly two stone, i am sleeping all night, i am not so crabby and ansty, and so importantly not Hungry.....all the time. Maybe you have a carb addiction...i cannot beleive the difference i feel towards food and the world in general...some people do not understand the hunger and how eating is soooooo not the only thing i think need to google itand maybe just maybe it may help. Good luck...talking to anybody is the first step! Xxx

Lilyflower Mon 18-Dec-17 10:47:23

-don't have tempting food in the house: no biscuits, cakes, chocs or whatever
-have a weekly meal plan and only buy what's on the list
-weigh yourself daily and if you put on a pound skip a meal
-distract yourself when you feel weak - go out for a walk and remove yourself from the food
-make exchanges, for example, swap a biscuit for an apple or salmon for a pork chop or a salad for a potato
-get a calorie counter and find out what common foods contain calorie-wise
-have things like melon in the house for weak moments. They have minimal calories

M and S and Waitrose have calorie counted ready meals without additives and 'nasties'. You could use them to kick start a new regime and wean yourself off them when you have lost a bit of weight.

However, I agree with the other commenters who have advised sorting out the basic underlying problem first.

Overthehills Mon 18-Dec-17 11:19:27

I lost 11lbs recently and felt really good. It is now starting to creep back on and now what I feel is disgust at myself, so I can totally understand how others feel. Serkeen I really do think you need to get help with your underlying problem and then, hopefully, you’ll be able to put a new eating regime into place.

W11girl Mon 18-Dec-17 11:20:29

Forget about healthy balanced meals in smaller portions...until you are used to eating more vegetables than worked for me. I started a fews years ago. I didn't see it as a diet but more of a lifestyle change. Since that time I have remained at the same weight, without leaving anything out of my daily diet. I am not a slave to it and know I can binge any time I want to, gaining one or two pounds, which soon come off when I resume my balanced eating.

NameChange2016 Mon 18-Dec-17 11:20:33

Have you tried Overeaters Anonymous? You can google them. If there isn't a meeting near you there are telephone ones.
It's a 12 step programme like Alcoholics Anonymous.

sandelf Mon 18-Dec-17 11:24:20

Study how 'healthy' people live and tweak your routine to be more like that. Every little change helps, and OVER TIME (be kind to yourself) will transform you. Recommend Patrick Holford nutrition books. It is only partly about what you eat (discomfort eating - not comfort eating). It's also about other parts of life - activity, interests etc it all repays looking at. All the best.

glammanana Mon 18-Dec-17 11:34:35

serkeenHave you tried not buying certain foods such as the ones you like to snack on,this past 6 weeks I have lost 12.5lbs after joining SW and am eating more than I did before to be honest all healthy stuff I may add.
When I feel tempted I reach for the fruit or a glass of water another good way is to get your coat on and go out for a walk for 10 mins.
Go to your Dr. and request he/she enrolls you in the NHS Good Eating Plan they are held at local clinics for an hour a week and have great backup when you are struddling my friend lost 3st on this plan and she has kept it off as she now has a totallly different view on eating and cooking.

LuckyFour Mon 18-Dec-17 12:50:41

If you struggle with wanting something sweet after your normal meal, try cooking some baking apples in advance then having a small bowl with perhaps a small spoon of plain yoghurt as your afters. Ideally eat either without sugar or with a drop of honey. As this is quite filling reduce the amount of your first course. Two or three smallish new potatoes should be enough.
My mum used to say - never nibble while you're cooking, never eat between meals, never eat children's leftovers. Works for me.

Patticake123 Mon 18-Dec-17 13:11:00

A couple of comments, first stop beating yourself up as that will just exacerbate the negative feelings you are experiencing and then it becomes a viscous cycle. Secondly, instead of thinking long term, think by the moment. ‘I won’t eat anything for the next 2 minutes ‘, as you take control you can increase the times. This has helped me, not giving myself unrealistic goals and dealing with it in minuscule time slots. I sincerely hope this helps you. One final thing, whilst we are bombarded with images of skinny women, and I have no idea how big you are, the pictures we are shown are often of young girls who have not yet reached puberty and it would be impossible to look like them. Love yourself.

Musicelf Mon 18-Dec-17 13:18:57

My DH and I embarked on a lifestyle change last January, and between us have now lost 5 stone. It's not been a diet, in that we still have the treats we love, but recognise that we have to treat them AS treats. I've been on diets all my life, and it's true what they say that when you stop dieting, the weight goes back on and is harder to lose the next time.

I do all my food shopping online, and what isn't in my basket can't tempt me. If I buy a treat, I delete it from my "favourites" so that I can't see it there next time.

Exercise is the important part, but I find it difficult with arthritis and a chronic back problem. I do what I can, and count steps - it all helps to motivate.

Whatever you do, do not call it a diet; from long experience this gives you an idea in your head that it is a temporary thing. A lifestyle change - going for healthier options and portion size control - is for the long term. You can do it; not easily, but you can.

(I'm re-motivating myself here!)

catherine138 Mon 18-Dec-17 14:05:57

Serkeen, Try the CD of Paul McKenna I can make you thin
I got this to lose weight but the CD made me think of my emotions, something I had never thought about before, the CD really calms me down, it is not a diet as such, it is worth a try.

jenpax Mon 18-Dec-17 14:12:39

Comfort eating is an eating disorder and comes from a mental health issue it cannot be dealt with just by the usual advice re diet and exercise! Do not beat yourself up about being over weight because of misery or depression instead try to get some help for the causes of it and to learn other stress coping mechanisms. I feel so sorry for you as people are understanding of weight loss eating disorders but tend to assume that comfort eating is just an excuse to pig out! Research has shown that certain foods release seratonin (the happy hormone) and this makes people more likely to comfort eat these foods for obvious reasons. Get the help you need to tackle your issues then the ability to loose weight will come.

allsortsofbags Mon 18-Dec-17 14:29:58

Have you had your Thyroid, B12 and Folate checked ? I do understand emotional eating makes it difficult to stick to a healthy eating program. I hold my hand up to that. However, a low count of any/all of the above can make it harder to stabilise emotions and the B12 is sometimes called the 'stress' vitamin. May be worth you doing some research on these.

Also finding a counsellor and some really good support as others have suggested would be really Self Valuing. You are worth all the effort you will be putting into caring for yourself, you really are.

I was sad when I read that you were "ashamed". Other people -whatever their relationship to you - "Do Not" have the right to Shame you.

Please, please, please don't "Shame" yourself because you are having a tough time and that tough time is making it hard for you to reach your goal at this time.

I would ask that you find ways to be kind to yourself and listen out for when you or others are putting you down and put a stop to it.

I hope you have found some support and useful suggestions here and that you find the help you need.

Take Care and congratulate yourself on reaching out. Oh and like most of us on here Well Done for getting this far in life. It isn't always easy and I'm sure you've had your fair share of hard times, so good on you for all the achievements you have had. Good Luck for the future.

Jalima1108 Mon 18-Dec-17 14:34:24

The only way I do not succumb to temptation Serkeen is not to buy any of the things which I know I like and would 'comfort eat'. However, I don't binge, two or three biscuits would be enough or a piece of cake or a few squares of chocolate - which I don't need.

If the DGC come they know there will rarely be biscuits/cakes in this house except for special occasions.

I do keep nuts and dried fruit in the cupboard which satisfy 'the munchies' and an urge for something sweet. I don't like crisps anyway except for the vegetable crisps.

If it's not in the house you can't eat it is my motto.

Jalima1108 Mon 18-Dec-17 14:36:41

I think bananas release serotonin and a banana before bedtime can help you to sleep.

Stella14 Mon 18-Dec-17 14:49:03

Diets don’t work. 99% of people who lose weight on them, regain that weight and more besides. It sounds as though you are struggling with feelings of self loathing. You mention shame, which is a horrible feeling. You really need to focus on accepting yourself as you are. You are far more likely to want to nurture yourself with good, nutritious food, rather than push feeling down with comfort food, if you like yourself. You are worth as much as anyone else whatever size you are, and whatever you eat. I recommend you read ‘Things No One Will Tell Fat Girls’ by Jess Baker. In addition to putting life into perspective on the fat/food front, it is also very funny in parts. Life is for living, loving and laughing. On your death bed, I’d bet my house that you won’t be thinking ‘I’d wish lost a few stone’, more likely thoughts will be about the things you wanted to do, but didn’t. In many people’s cases, that is because they were full of self loathing and shame, not because their body was too fat to physically do it!

Dogsjj Mon 18-Dec-17 14:59:32

Try not to buy fattening food, especially treats.

Dogsjj Mon 18-Dec-17 15:01:11

Try not to buy fattening food, especially treats.