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Grandmother “ dry-nursing” grandchild?

(38 Posts)
Daddima Mon 18-Dec-17 12:59:41

Not for me, thanks!

I don’t know if I’d feel differently if it was my daughter’s child, but don’t think so.

MissAdventure Mon 18-Dec-17 13:04:02

It gives me the heebie jeebies!

DanniRae Mon 18-Dec-17 13:41:51

Me too Miss A!!

Christinefrance Mon 18-Dec-17 14:52:37

It seems strange now but don't forget that historically a wet nurse was employed to feed the baby of wealthy parents.
At least this lady was related to the child. I don't know how I would feel though it seems odd.

janeainsworth Mon 18-Dec-17 15:01:51

Quote: “As it turns out, her daughter was happy with her mum's dry-nursing”

So what’s it got to do with anyone else and how on earth did the story find its way into the newspapers and social media?

GrandmaMoira Mon 18-Dec-17 15:05:07

It sounds all wrong. I have also heard of adoptive mothers breastfeeding their adopted babies in the USA.

NotTooOld Mon 18-Dec-17 15:51:12

Words fail.

annodomini Mon 18-Dec-17 15:55:38

If it worked, why not?

trisher Mon 18-Dec-17 16:24:46

If she's happy, DD is happy and baby isn't crying what the hell has it got to do with anyone else?

Baggs Mon 18-Dec-17 16:26:02

Shrug. A cuddling dummy. What's not to like?

Slightly off topic... I didn't dry up completely for eighteen months after DD2 was weaned. It was a nice feeling thinking that if I'd been needed as a wet nurse I could have obliged. I wonder, in short generations and before much birth control, if grandmas sometimes did help feed their grandchildren? Some of them might still have been producing babies when their oldest daughters started to reproduce.

Fennel Mon 18-Dec-17 16:31:39

"I have also heard of adoptive mothers breastfeeding their adopted babies in the USA. "
I mentioned on another thread that DiL had managed to do this.

Esspee Mon 18-Dec-17 16:46:45

Done with the full knowledge and agreement of the mother it is a great solution.
I, very briefly, nursed a baby whose mother was in despair as she wasn't taking her breast. The transition to the mum went smoothly and baby was successfully breastfed.
I also had a friend with a child of the same age as my second. We had a pact that if either of us was in difficulty the other would ensure their baby was fed. Their elder child was bitten by a dog. Mum left baby with me as she took her to A&E. Come feeding time he was screaming and I offered my breast. He latched on eagerly, relaxed, opened his eyes, saw it wasn't mummy and screamed. Fortunately mummy arrived soon after.
I cannot understand why anyone thinks there is anything wrong with the scenario brought up by the OP.

Jalima1108 Mon 18-Dec-17 17:07:38

Well, she has a baby DC only 11 months older than her DGD so is this dry nursing or wet nursing?
I'm sure it used to be normal years ago.

Is she American? (she and her DD have the same pediatrician {sic} and belong to the same 'Mommy Group'?)

Sennelier1 Mon 18-Dec-17 17:12:01

To Baggs : yes indeed, in former times it was very common for grandmothers to breastfeed their grandchildren if f.i. their daugther or daughter in law died in childbirth or was too poorly to BF. Often they only had to put the infant to their breast a few times before milkproduction started up again. And of course as often as not an aunt, an adult sister or other mature female relative would help out if needed. Mind you, this was done only if that kind of help was required, in those days when formula didn't exist and the only other alternative to BF was cowsmilk or goatsmilk - and not everybody had those at hand. In rural areas this was a life-saver, whereas the use of a wetnurse by the rich was of course just for conveniance.

Bathsheba Mon 18-Dec-17 17:39:32

She sounds a very sensible GM to me. It felt natural to her, it obviously felt natural to the baby. The baby was comforted, stopped crying and went to sleep. I can't understand what all the fuss is about.

BlueBelle Mon 18-Dec-17 17:45:34

Blimey I d feel dead funny if I came home and found my baby at my mothers breast and no I don’t know why exactly I must be weird but I gave my grandkids gripe water a dummy and lots of back rubbing if they had colic not an empty boob

mcem Mon 18-Dec-17 18:31:12

Having adopted Dd1 and gaining confidence, I did ask if baby no 2 could come to me straight from hospital at just a couple of days old. This was refused - not for any reason I could understand (birth mum having reservations?) but because the legal process couldn't start until the baby reached 6 weeks.
I'd happily have tried breastfeeding, given the chance, as I'd read that it was quite possible. In the 6 weeks that Dd2 was fostered, she'd been introduced to solids - Bird's custard with sugar!
10 years later the unexpected 'miracle baby' arrived and for 9 months was successfully breastfed.
I believe my sister and I might have 'swapped babies' if necessary but Mum? I think not - just as I wouldn't have done with my Dgc's!

Franbern Wed 20-Dec-17 10:54:21

Human breast milk is what is best for human babies. Does not really matter from whose breast it comes. I returned to fostering soon after I had stopped b.feeding my twins. One poor new -born baby arrived, not actually sickly, but definitely unhappy - I put him to my breast and his suckling brought my milk back again for him. He thrived and I enjoyed it. Fat better than formula!!!!
When same twins (both girls) had babies six months apart, they could and did happily breast feed each others baby when they were looking after them.
Problem is nothing to do with a grandmother breast feeding her g.child, it is modern societies perception of what human breasts are actually there for.

MissAdventure Wed 20-Dec-17 11:02:42

It does seem strange to frown about it, when the alternative is to feed a baby milk from another species! Breast feeding another persons baby seems fine, if everyone is happy with it. But dry nursing? Nope. Still gives me the shudders. I probably have issues.

Luckygirl Wed 20-Dec-17 11:08:16

I can see no problem with it at all.

newnanny Wed 20-Dec-17 11:32:11

When my youngest sister had her baby I had successfully breastfed my son for almost a year and had plenty of milk. My sister had hardly any milk for the first two or three weeks as was ill after the birth so she brought baby to me to feed when she ran out of milk often last feed before bed. After a couple of weeks she was better and produced more milk so fed her herself. I was happy to help out and alternative would have been to give her DD a bottle and then it is harder to get DD to breastfeed after bottle.

FarNorth Wed 20-Dec-17 15:00:38

When my DS had colic, he could not be soothed by feeding with breast or bottle (he was mainly breast fed).
He would completely refuse and carry on screaming.

petra Wed 20-Dec-17 15:04:09

What a lovely story Re the new born baby smile
i probably have issues
I gree with you there. I think it was you who said you hadn't seen yourself naked for years: that's odd.

grannyactivist Wed 20-Dec-17 15:52:36

I've wet nursed a friend's baby so I'm easy with this. I guess the mother in this instance thought that she knew her daughter well enough to know it wouldn't be a problem to her - and she was right.

MissAdventure Wed 20-Dec-17 16:04:04

Perhaps it is odd, Petra. I can't think of any reason why I would need to look at myself naked, as in standing in front of a mirror.