My will and how to protect my daughter.

It's infuriating that a years marriage counts for more in financial settlements than those women who lived with their partner for 10 years, had a child and were then abandoned.

To the poster Ginny42 who says a short marriage doesn’t mean you have to share half I m not sure that’s correct well it wasn’t in my case
I had been married to my second husband a year ( although we d been together four before we married) when my Nan died leaving half her house to me and half to my mum mum didn’t want the house so I took out a mortgage and bought my mums half A year after we moved in my husband left me for another lady I saw a solicitor and was told although he’d only lived in said house a year he was entitled to half the only way I could save my inheritance was to negotiate with him as to what he would accept in place, he choose that I would take over his debts which were considerably less than half the house so that’s what I did and 35 years later I m still in my house

We have put our home into a trust, but for completely different reasons. We did it through a local company of will writers. Solicitors specialising in nothing else and members of the Institute of Professional Willwriters. They know all the pitfalls and have seen it all before. Yours is not an unusual situation.

They also hold copies of the wills and will deal with everything when we die as part of the initial fee. My DM had her will held by them and everything on the legal side went smoothly on her demise which was a great relief and help.

Plenty of advice here. I would just add go now

Daisy, did you have any success with writing a new will/setting up a trust?

I am in a similar position with my eldest daughter, so any advice would be welcome.

Can you put your assets into a trust account leaving it equally between your daughter and grandson only?
However look at an accountant to run their affairs for them. Solicitors cost to much it will probably cost 2-3 % of any annual income but will keep the wolves from the door plus her husband you don’t trust.

I have just changed my will for exactly the same reason as you. What they asked me to do was leave everything to my grandson and explain why in a separate legal letter. This way even if it is contested the court will read the letter and dismiss it out of court. It's Like you are giving your wishes beyond the grave.

If you left the property to your grandson and any future off Spring that your daughter might have and allowed for her to live in it for life, you would need it set up as a Trust. this is a complicated area of law and if not done correctly the trust could be broken or contested in a divorce. A further point to consider is how your own daughter might be effected by this as well as your grandson in her later years, it would be her home but she may want to move or need to move.the house would need to be sold and then the trust must specify what is allowable under its terms regarding selling, and who are trustees you would also need to make provision for the up keep of the house, is there a separate pot of money for this? The terms of the trust would need to specify who was responsible for upkeep
. As others have said I would strongly suggest that you get a probate and trusts solicitor to draw up the documentation there are a lot of things to be considered in estate planning and anything complex needs proper advice

But her will was legally binding - what she wanted to happen after her death is only a wish, a hope unless she had written the will differently.

Ah yes, I do see what you mean now.
Unless she had left it to them with the proviso that you could live in it (under certain conditions)

Jalima1108 I don't think I worded that right.
My nan wanted the house soley left to me and to keep it that way, she then wanted the house left to her great grandchildren (my DDs) when I died.

It didn't pan out that way after she died. She didn't have control over what happened to it after it was in my name if you see what I mean?

So if the OP states she wants XYZ left to her DD and only her DD, she doesn't have any control over it once she isn't here, and its in DDs name.
But I think there's ways to protect XYZ if DD agrees with DM.

I was told a will is an outline of what you want it can't be set in stone.
A will is legally binding.
When it says it is not set in stone it means you can change the terms of it yourself if you wish.
It could be contested if anyone else thinks they have a right to any part or whole of your estate, but that would not seem to be the case here. Or a recipient of all or part of the estate could exercise a Deed of Variation if they wish.

A good solicitor will ensure your Will is legal, and difficult to contest and should cover all eventualities.

As it's not a simple will and you want it to be absolutely water-tight, perhaps the free will service may not be appropriate, but it is a good idea for those wanting simple or mirror wills. The amount given to the chosen charity can be as much as you wish and is paid out of the estate, not upfront.

Apricity is absolutely correct: you need legal advice ASAP. Most firm's websites will give you an idea of what they specialise in; make sure you use one who regularly do trusts, executries and private client work. You need some quite specific advice.

It is rarely as expensive as you think, amd it will certainly pay for itself in the peace of mind it gives you.

I was told a will is an outline of what you want it can't be set in stone.
However, you can leave the house in soley her name, because it's an inheritance there is loop holes and things so he can't demand 50% of it.

My nan did this with me. She wanted the house soley mine but I gifted half to my DH which she had no control over. So once it's gone to your DD she can do whatever she likes with it.

Would urge you to get good legal advice from a solicitor specialising in Wills and estates asap.This is not a situation where opinions or other peoples experiences that may, or may not, be informed or relevant are particularly valuable however well intentioned.

You need good legal advice that pertains to your personal situation. You are not obliged to discuss this with anyone other than your legal advisor if that is your wish. Be very clear about your concerns and your wishes with your solicitor. As was discussed on another thread you may wish to leave a letter explaining your actions with your solicitor that is only to be opened after your death.

Discussing these sort of issues with people who may feel aggrieved or disinherited before your death can be extremely stressful and pretty horrible. You don't need that stress. You are just trying to protect the future interests of those you love.

Follow the advice given already and pay for a solicitor to draw up a legal document .If it's not done thoroughly to your wishes then you may not get what you want so in my opinion it's worth paying for it to
1.. Make sure what you want is legally acceptable
2.. Get it all written down legally so their is no room for any misunderstanding from any party.
3.. Give you peace of mind .

maryeliza54 has given good advice here in both her posts. A well established firm of solicitors, with partners who specialise in different areas of law. It will be cost effective and give you peace of mind. You are definitely not alone in your concerns.

Craicon that’s exactly what a properly drawn up will/trust will allow for - that’s what they are expensive because it takes up time discussing all the ‘what ifs’ and allowing for them. We thought we’d come up with plenty of ‘what ifs’ but our wonderful solicitor had seen it all and then some and added plenty more herself

Good advice maryeliza. I too believe that (usually) you get what you pay for, and if you need good advice, which the OP clearly does, you have to pay for it.

I don’t know how old your daughter is but could she have another child (either before or after you’ve died)?
That could cause problems between the step grandchildren when they’re much older. The older one will have a house with no mortgage and the younger one could be stuck in rented accommodation with not even enough for a decent deposit.

I completely agree that you need very good advice. You cannot control what your daughter does with anything she inherits from you, but you can arrange a trust that offers some protection to her child/ren. However, leaving it to your minor grandchild/ren, even in trust creates other complications.
These are the legal specialists:
www.step.org/what-step-does

I’m very sure you won’t get a free will and don’t even try to get a ‘bargain’ - be prepared to pay for a really good solicitor, it will be well worth it. Go for a firm that has been well established in your town for ages and has several partners with one specialising in wills etc. When you make the appointment say your situation is complicated and you want someone senior. You are being s sensible thinking this through and wanting to protect your daughter. One final thought - think about a friend/relative who you really trust who would be willing to be a trustee as I’m pretty sure a trust will have to be set up to protect your estate. Go for a generation down from yourself.

Daisy I cant believe you have just wrote what I have been wanting to write for years! your story is a mirror image..I shall follow the thread for advice...good luck.

Definitely a time for legal advice. There will be a way around it. The rich have been doing this sort of thing for generations.

PS, if you leave the property in trust, that allows your DD to live in it, then I imagine her OH will also be there, it could prove difficult for your GS to get him out.