House guests with “needs!”

The cross contamination element is the tricky thing to manage. I agree with the person who said to just order in Gluten free labelled meals/items that can be microwaved.

EllieB52, It sounds as though you are committed to the pre-Xmas and Xmas visitors, and there's lots of helpful advice given here by GNs. But why not book yourself a hotel break for immediately after Christmas - say from 27th Dec? (With or without DH - your choice!)

Get everyone mucking in, it's more fun that way. Preparing food and eating together is good. My family know if they want decent food when they come to stay everyone mucks in. That way the works not all in the host and you chat whilst your cooking, eating and washing up, ensuring you're spending every precious moment you can together

I totally agree with cook ahead and freeze, whatever you decide to have. I wouldn't suggest that they prepare anything for themselves. One of my DDs and her OH are vegetarian, - their three DC are half and half. As I'm catering for at least twelve each Christmas, or family get together, I once agreed to my Sil's suggestion that he provide their food. They arrived not long before our meal time with all the ingredients for salmon en croute, whereupon he needed a fair bit of kitchen space to get it all together, plus a shelf in my oven, which was already full. I was not amused!

Your Kiwi family are 5 adults who are probably used to catering for themselves.
Why should you be the cook and washerup? Let them arrange their own diet, as no doubt they do at home.
They are coming to see YOU and it'll spoil the visit if you're dashing about like a headless chook worrying all the time.

I agree with Gagajo's post - and it's only for 3 days.
PLEASE enjoy it.

There are some great suggestions in this thread to cope with the veggie/coeliac requirements, plus M & S really do do an excellent range of delicious vegetarian/vegan foods, & whilst initially they might seem a bit pricey, they save so much time and stress. Their pre-prepared veg is pretty good too. Life is too short, etc etc to spend hours and hours in the kitchen,...or ironing bedding. (Again plenty of suggestions in this thread on non-iron solutions).
Why not take a break after Christmas yourselves in a b&b or hotel - you'll deserve/need it. And suggest to stepson that they come in the summer instead (when you can get unruly kids out of the house in better weather)! Oh - and tell DH to do his bit! It's 2019 - not 1919! DH here still works (we're both past the big sevenO,) and gives a hand indoors when needed, helps to change beds, unload dishwasher etc,etc.
Good luck with it all, cheat like mad with pre-bought pre-prepared food, and enjoy the family's visits, spending time with them -not slaving in the kitchen!

Why does anyone tolerate a husband who sits on his backside, particularly when the visiting NZ five are his family? You've been given enough advice on how to cope with that visit.

What I would put restrictions on is the stepson who wants to come to stay post-Xmas with his kids! No mention of a wife so I expect you'll be caring for his children while he chills out with his dad.

When we have a house full of family they all muck in. Perhaps because DH does the cooking now and they don't expect to be waited on by him as much as they would a mum.

When DiL was on a very restrictive diet she would bring a lot of her own food so she only picked at the stuff we'd cooked taking what she could eat. The others all help with tidying, cleaning and food preparation and usually bring offerings of puddings, etc with them.

Personally, I wouldn't be stressing about it. You need to give the responsibility to the person who has the coeliac disease, or her mother, to make sure that she provides you with a suggested list off basic food items they would normally eat. They are only there for 3 days, so find out what she normally eats for breakfast, which could be the same each day. You might go out for the odd lunch/dinner, so only need to cook 1 or 2 of each. I'd keep it simple, opting for something vegetarian that can be cooked in a casserole, or baking dish, and frozen (there's some great vegetarian mediterranean/Spanish recipes on Pinterest that are my go-to when I have vegetarian guests). Serve with a nice salad, or mixed vegetables dish and, if you feel the need to provide a little extra for the carnivores, simply roast a chicken with herbs/spices and cut it up, or quickly pan fry some nice steaks.

And, definitely tell your husband, if he wants the visitors, he needs to do his fair share in the kitchen and around the house! Again, keep it simple, don't bother ironing the bed linen, and make sure you leave the bathroom spray by the shower and instruct your guests to give the sink/shower a once over when they've used it! They are family, so you can tell them to do that! ... And the Domestos by the loo!! You're not running a B&B, and you shouldn't have to work twice as hard just because you have guests staying.

I'm relieved to hear that, Gabriella!

If you think that coeliac disease is an allergy any guests must be relieved too.

Do you take them out for breakfast, lunch and dinner?
We find some surprising levels of ignorance about coeliac disease when eating out (especially in NZ, surprisingly).

If anyone has a food allergy which necessitates separate cooking, we eat out, no question. I don't do umpteen meals scanning dozens of ingredients.

Not all shop-bought sausages contain gluten; Tesco sausages are gf but do check the label. It's just a matter of reading everything. Cornflour is gf, but check because some cornflour in Australia and NZ is made from wheat would you believe! so it's possible that some brands in the UK could be too.

Don't be offended if the one with coeliac checks all your labels or perhaps questions you about ingredients in anything you've made - it is important.

Enlist help - they're coming to see you, not to check how well you iron the sheets!

My husband is coeliac and vegetarian. You can get pasta gf use cornflour, gf bread rolls. There is such a selection Eat all gf... sausages Heck are too!
It’s not too scary... honest. Just some planning.

My daughter has coeliacs disease and never expects anyone to go to great lengths for her as a visitor. As others have said there is hidden gluten in stock cubes etc but you can buy GF. You cannot use the same toaster but you can use toaster pockets (like food wrap envelopes) or a clean grill. Cant fry in the same fat as normal battered or breaded food.its not as bad as you may be fearing, plan & buy ahead. Lots of great recipes online, keep it simple. Lived in nz over 20 yrs theyre generally pretty laid back. My daughter can eat plain crisps & pom bears as a munchi treat. There are gf breads, wraps, biccies, sausages (m&s are fab) have a gf chopping board.im sure they'll appreciate your efforts. As for hubby - great at inviting but not the attached work obs, thats just not on. Ask him to do stuff in front of guests, if necessary lie & say 'you're best at xxxx' as for stepson & co tell hubby straight 'no way' they're out of control & add I'm sure your kids were better behaved. You want things to go right & its putting pressure on you-plan ahead, involve hubby & put him in charge of some tasks - fingers crossed. I buy fitted sheets & dont iron them any more. In the words od Dads Army - don't panic! They can like it or lump it YOU are important too.

Coeliac UK will have some good advice. If you are going out for a meal any branch of ASK Italian has a non-gluten menu as does Frankie and Benny s. Many Indian restaurants are good but my advice is phone and ask the restaurant beforehand. The one thing to avoid is Chinese food, the soy sauce contains gluten. If you are cooking your own Chinese rice or rice noodles are fine. Check labels. You can get GF soy sauce but it is expensive.

And use cornflour as a thickener for all dishes instead of wheat flour. So, vegetarian stews/ soups etc thickened with cornflour and jobs a good’n. Also, gluten free cakes are often made with oil instead of butter and quite often include sweet be such as carrots parsnips courgette. They are delicious for everyone. My husband is not vegan but is a coeliac. Good luck ?

I'm coeliac and cook from scratch most days. Soups, stews, curries, are my go to recipes. Don't bother making bread etc most supermarkets cater for GF if the person is seriously intolerant to cross contamination it may be easier to consider using prepared ready meals, talk to the family about how they manage the condition. I'm sure you will be fine. I also concur on abandoning the ironing

I'm coeliac and all I would ask is, please check the list of ingredients for EVERYTHING that comes in a packet. It is surprising how many foods you think should be gf aren't. Including any oats that aren't specifically gf, Marmite, rice krispies, corn flakes ...

btw, slightly disappointed this turned out to be about food.

I thought perhaps you were hosting swingers .

Lovely OP....stop! Why is all of this your responsibility?

The person with the particular needs is a separate issue.

The others.....vegetarian is so easy these days. Lots of stuff in the main stores. They can eat what you would normally have but substitute quorn.

They can have pizza takeaway one night. Each guest can bring a dish ( those who live in the UK)

Is your partner able bodied? Is the Step son also able bodied?
They must do their bit.
If you insist on gorgeous bedding , send it to a laundry.

If you google 'Keto vegetarian', you might get some ideas as Keto avoids wheat. Wheat-free breakfast can be a pain, try veggie bacon and eggs for all. Veggies will eat eggs - you didn't say they were vegan. Cook lots in advance and freeze.

(Worrying about changing the beds - buy some new sets of bedding so the washing turn round is not so bad?)

My DGD can’t eat wheat but loves roast beef or chicken, baked potatoes with toppings, salmon, sushi and curry (can be veg) beware Pringles as they contain wheat. Separate butter and jam labelled. Good luck

we are a vegetarian family with one coeliac who will eat meat and fish sometimes. I normally cook gluten free vegetarian food for all of us. Favourites are:
Paneer and pea curry - hairy Bikers recipe
Shepherds pie with quorn mince or made with lentils and beans.
Pasta and sauce - use gluten free pasta for everyone ( the Doves Farm ones are the best) Bosh have good interesting recipes.
Nut roast
Sir fry - use caudlron marinated tofu.
Sausage casserole ( Quorn gluten free sausages)
I tend to make either an almond based cake or a crumble using gluten free flour. Most ice cream is OK.
Gluten free bread is much better now than it was. Nice cheeses with corn cakes or gluten free crackers will substitute for puddings if you prefer.
Don't faff about making 3 versions of everything, do a bit of research and save time and effort by making one thing for everyone.
And .... I'm another one who hasn't ironed any bedding for my whole 35 years of married life. We have linen sheets and duvet covers which are meant to look creased.

Ironing bedding!!!!!!! I fold up the laundered sheets, pillow cases and duvet covers, then put them in turn under the seat of my DH’s easy chair. In one day they are well pressed -and he doesn’t notice.

I've never ironed bedding. In my life.

My Grandma always did.