presents

My own in-laws were very friendly with my parents. As we were usually all together on Christmas Day they would bring small gifts for each other, usually a nice bottle of wine.
We are on good terms with our son’s in-laws but have never done this. In fact I’ve just realised I didn’t send them a card this year!

I think if you are seeing them in person over the Christmas period it's nice to give a little gift. I was meeting up with my daughter's partner and his parents, whom I've only met twice before. They gave me a tin of fancy chocolate biscuits, and I gave them two little jars of home made jam and chutney. Something consumable seems like the best choice in such circumstances.

We have 3 adult children, and have never bought presents for any of their in-laws.
Do as Martin Lewis advises, and try not to buy unnecessary presents, or donate to a charity , on behalf of them all.
It all seems to get out of hand too quickly and worries all the givers and receivers.

Yes for one but we never see the others at Christmas.
We see a lot of the one anyway.

If I was going to be in their company I would buy them something they may like, eg wine, planted basket etc

Septimia Whoa! it should be chocolates/biscuits/wine or similar. Something simple and inoffensive

I have received all these things for Christmas and whilst not exactly offensive, are useless, entirely inappropriate and a waste of the givers' money.

Only buy what you know for sure is going to please them and if you don't know them well enough, ask the adult children for advice.

I didn’t expect to start doing this, but DD advised me that her new in-laws who we would be seeing at Christmas had got presents for us, so I feel obliged to reciprocate. This has continued every year for three years now. However she spends more than double the amount I do, and often on things I can’t use. I wish it could be stopped as it is quite unnecessary, but I don’t know how, as she is quick to misinterpret. We have never done it with the other in-laws.

No.

It depends entirely on how friendly you are with them. With one set of in-laws who live quite close, we don't exchange presents but usually go to a Christmas concert or some other event in Jan or Feb together.

The others are too far away.

Depends on the family. We used to with one set, tokens really, as we often saw them on Christmas Day. A few years ago we stopped by mutual agreement. We were advised by our other daughter in law that her family didn’t expect it so we never began. I don’t think there are rules whoisthis, hope there hasn’t been some family tension.

If you do, it should be chocolates/biscuits/wine or similar. Something simple and inoffensive. Trying to choose presents for people that you don't spend a lot of time with is far too difficult!

Well we all agreed not to, we all get on extremely well, but didn’t want to have to start more present buying.