Losing your looks

Too true Maw - I’m thinking Britt Ekland now in ‘The Real Marigold Hotel’.
?

Sometimes men are the worst. Some seem stuck in a time warp! They seem to choose their favourite time/look and not move on. I’ve seen 70y old men in double-denim (jacket and jeans ?) so ageing - especially if the jeans have the 70’s ironed-in front crease!). Often they still have longish hair, coiffed and blow waved. Cringeworthy.

I put shorts on this morning. And I have old ladies knees. Bit fat and wrinkled. That must have happened over the winter !!!!
DH said my legs are not bad, so I will be content with that . Bless him

The mirror in my bathroom tells me I look pretty good for my age. Therefore I take no chances wit any other.

I've noticed more pronounced lines/bags under my eyes, and gobble gobble turkey neck! Mind you I did manage to lose about 10 lb early in the year, which i needed to do. My skin just hasn't shrunk back yet!

Never a beauty, but not that bad either, I find keeping relatively well groomed and a bit of makeup work wonders. Posture as well - chin up and shoulders back shows confidence!

Lookernomore - please treat yourself to a home facial or nice face cream, and maybe a new lipstick. And change your handle to I'mstillalooker!

I was never a beauty but always seemed to be attractive to men. I will never forget when a happily married slightly older work colleague said to me 'Please stop looking at me like that with those eyes or I might do something we would both regret.' It was always thus although I was never flirtatious nor mentally or physically unfaithful to DH from the moment I met him - the love of my life since I was 17. Yet still, to this day I seem to remain attractive and regularly get 'chatted up'

I am sure this doesn’t apply to OP but one of the saddest sights is that of a woman (or man) who seriously rated their looks when younger - or depended on them and cannot accept that time has moved on and they have nothing left to commmend them.
Plumped up lips, “work done”, faces stretched and lifted till they nearly meet round the back, boobs enhanced, skirts too short, makeup way too heavy etc etc We can all think of examples - Trinny Woodall is one who seems to be popping up advertising her cosmetics range, Joan Collins, Dolly Parton, Paul McCartney’s dyed barnet, Cliff Richard with skin like a baby’s bum and the chief ultimate champion of age denial - the Donald!
Compare and contrast with faces showing true character and life experience.
No cream of product or “tweakment” stops ageing let alone the Seven signs - aching joints, incontinence, forgetfulness and four others which I forget.
If looks are all we have to depend on what a waste of a life

I just don’t look in the mirror with my glasses on.
At least, not if I can help it.

Same strategy is very helpful for ignoring dust. ?

Grandafrench

Actually, I should never because my eyes seem to disappear these days when I

Oops, there I go again!

I can't lose them as I never had them in the first place. Although I did see a photo of me taken in my 40s and I thought, 'oh, I wasnt that bad!'.

However, I do know what you mean!

I hope it was a joke about shaving - don't, either use an epilator or wax strips if you can or I think there are home lasers etc.

Could that be a sign of hormone imbalance if you have a lot of facial hair?

What you see in the mirror are the signs of experience!
You have done and know things that others lack.
Be proud of your knowledge.

Gagajo I feel you. I’ve had thyroid disease since I was 30, terrible digestion with Barrett’s esophagus, and most recently, trochanter bursitis and patellofemoral syndrome. I’m in pain a fair amount of time. Currently I have esophagitis and gastritis. I definitely believe disease and pain can age a person a great deal. Sometimes it just makes it hard to smile! Bless you and take care!

Thanks for all the good information and warm responses. You know it just seems like yesterday I was young and vibrant. I worked out as a hobby, literally. I loved being a young wife to a fabulous man and mother to two daughters I adored. My daughters grew up and had my five adorable grandchildren. I love all of them to bits, but I wish I wasn’t so darn dead tired. I spent tons of time with my first two - grandson (age 15) and granddaughter (age 10) but GS (9), GS (9) and GD (8) have been neglected by me. When my grandchildren stay with me, I drop everything to play and laugh and teach (their parents don’t do enough teaching). They all love to stay with their Nana and Papaw, and now I don’t get them as much because they wear me out and get on my nerves so bad. This makes me feel so guilty! Can anybody relate to this?

No wonder my laugh-lines are getting deeper and more pronounced----it's some of the posts on here, they're hilarious

Lookernomore You really do seem to have grasped the 'getting older' thing. And the way that you write, you sound as if you've got so much spark and humour and honesty that there's certainly no need to worry about or fear those blurry images that keep turning up in your mirror.

Just carry on being you, I think you're doing fine. Make your hairdresser your friend (I'd kill for thick hair now), less is more with the cosmetics, use some good night cream, and don't use a razor on your face or we'll all come to get you!!!!! Shaving only makes much bigger problems, use a special bleaching cream like Jolen on your moustache instead, and consider laser treatment or take the advice of a beauty salon, or become a fiend with a good pair of tweezers if there's not too much growth on your face.... you are in no way doomed to become your brothers any day soon!! Every woman in the world needs to keep some tweezers handy after 40, I reckon.

Join in with things, try to do one small thing just for you every day, take a class, go dancing or go walking and make sure you meet up with your women friends for a damn good laugh as much as possible when we're free again. People are always drawn to your character, not your looks. If only the surgically changed, plumped, ironed, Botoxed and filled girls of today could grasp that looks go first, because once we accept that we no longer need to be shallow slaves to our appearance 24/7, watching others watching us. We've all met people like that - sad! Enjoy life, relax, stay safe and please keep posting.

I was very pretty, probably up to about 47/8 but then all the trauma of cancer and multiple surgeries caught up with me and I seemed to age 10 years overnight.

I’m lucky that I’ve always valued my intellect over my looks, but working around teenagers is hard. They have soft and firm skin and just glow with health. I feel like a fat, wrinkled old prune in comparison.

My hat is off to those of you that don’t let aging or your looks bother you. I’m going to work at that myself. In response to the bushy hair being a good thing, I’ve grown my hair long and worn it a few different ways. I’m just not very good at styling it. I’m worse with a curling iron than with a flat iron. I’ve heard of a chignon and intend to look it up on YouTube and see if I can do it. I’ve also tried hot rollers and currently I’m using pink sponge rollers occasionally with some luck.

As far as make-up, I have learned that less is more. I use a powder foundation, mascara only on my upper lashes (my poor eyes are barely visible due to bags and droopiness), and a bit of blush and lipstick.

Many of you mentioned taking really good care of your skin. I’ve done that too. I’ve worn sunscreen on all exposed areas since I was about 19. However, I laid in the sun a lot from the age of 13-19, so that is 6 years of a lot of damage! My dad and two brothers could grow a beard in no time, so I’m guessing that that is the reason I have a mustache and a beard. I heard that shaving is bad on a woman’s face. Any ideas?

Kittylester - you have a rude and obnoxious neighbor!
Marydoll - You’re lovely
Twice as nice - I envy you
Grandmafrench - You’re a smart and funny lady! When I first look in the mirror, I see my mother, then my daughter, then I blink and see an old, tired woman that’s a bit creepy looking!
Kate54 - Thanks for the great ideas.
Kandinsky - You’re funny - I love you!
Nansnet - You’re smart

grandmafrench... that was very funny?

I don’t think I mind about losing looks, it’s natural isn’t it? Add to that the fact that I never care what other people think,
Which always helps.?

I don’t mind looking older but am struggling with looking miserable. Corners of my mouth turned down and marionette lines. Jowls and hooded eyes. I am not a miserable person in the slightest and do smile a lot but my resting face just looks so grumpy. What with that and the scary hairy moles I look like an old style Disney witch. However, I have never felt more relaxed and blessed than I do now. Loving life and thankful for every day. The outside doesn’t match the inside.???

It's the drooping eyelids that bother me the most. And the furrows of lines that look like a road map of Britain. And the hair that, now it hasn't been dyed, is almost completely white. Oh, and the lips that seem to have shrunk so much they're like a lizards. Other than that I'm ok.

I was very pretty back in the day, and whilst I can still scrub up fairly well when I get my hair done, and put on some makeup, nothing can hide my now-drooping eyelids (once my best feature), my downturned mouth at the corners, and the sagging jowls which suddenly seemed to appear overnight!

Sometimes, when I see a beautiful celebrity who's the same age as me, I start to wonder why my looks (and body!) have slipped. However, when I think about the grueling lifestyles that some of them lead in order to remain looking that way ... strict faddy diets, hours of gym sessions, botox, etc ... Frankly, I'd rather be me!

I have two lovely grownup children, a beautiful little GD, and a husband who still loves me after all these years ... even on my worst days!Lol We should all be thankful for what we do have, and not mourn the loss of youthful looks, which were part of who we were ... but we're still the same people ... just with more interesting features, that have a stories to tell.

Another advantage of ageing is that everytbing is a blur without my specs on. To paraphrase Hilary Clinton "you can change your hair and your shoes but the rest is up to nature"
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I'd like to have bushy hair! Have you thought about growing it long and luxurious and tying it loosely at the nape of the neck in a pre-Raphaelite chignon? I can't get over someone complaining about bushy hair!

As for the facial problems, learn to do make up that disguises defects That Maybelline stuff someone recommends sounds good Maybelline are good at eye makeup. Probably pat it on lightly don't smear or rub.

Facial hair: shaving or alternatives depend on how much and how strong. I shave as I am basically sort of fair skinned and only a few wiry hairs on chin and upper lip.

It’s a lot harder to accept the ageing process if you were very pretty - thankfully, I always looked like the back of a bus so it’s much easier for me ?

On bad days I look like an old dog but there’s nothing to be done except try hard. I do hate not getting my hair coloured though.

My 85 year old cousin has no wrinkles. She looks wonderful ?