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Anxiety with twin grandsons

(3 Posts)
twinsgrammy Sun 30-Aug-20 19:58:34

My daughter had twin babies at just 25 weeks gestation. They were in the NICU for 110 days and came home end of July. They are still on oxygen but they are doing well. Our journey with them has been one fraught with worry, bad news, a never ending rollercoaster. We almost lost the 1 twin to a bad infection and they are miracles to have even survived. I am an absolute wreck around them. I panic when one of them even coughs a little for fear they are choking or they can't get air, the list goes on. This isn't normal anxiety, it renders me unable to even enjoy them. Their traumatic birth and time in the hospital has left me in some trouble it seems. I just wanted to know if anyone else has had an issue similar to this with preemie granbabies who have been through many health issues as my grandsons. I'm ashamed of myself. My daughter needs my help and I hide it the best I can when I am there with them, but inside I am an absolute mess. It seems to getting worse and not better.

grandma60 Sun 30-Aug-20 20:14:43

My sons twins were born at 26 weeks and I can remember well what you are going through. There were times when one or the other stopped breathing which was frightening, as well as other issues. They were born in February and came home in June.
They are 6 years old now and in their 2nd year in infant school. One was thought to have learning difficulty but has caught up. They both have COPD but you would never believe it seeing them rushing around. They love swimming and riding their bikes.
The first couple of years may bring you some worries but our grandsons have proved that there is hope.

Lolo81 Sun 30-Aug-20 21:08:37

My friend had her (now strapping and healthy 8 yo) boys at 25 weeks. Her mum and MIL both struggled to begin with. Mum used her faith as a way to cope and spent some time being counselled by her parish priest. MIL did a lot of googling and found some online support groups.

Not sure if either of these things would be helpful to you?

I personally suffer from panic attacks and have medication I can take to help a bit - so maybe the GP might be an option too?