Would you sell your house & downsize to help your sibling?

If your house is large enough why not have them to live with you until they can get sorted?

If they have no jobs either then relocation shouldn't be a problem.

I can’t imagine what horrendous crime must have been committed for a dying man to be carted off to prison given the situation now where custodial sentences are so rare.

How about child abuse? I know an 81 year old man who's sins have just been found out. He is facing a substantial sentence regardless of age. And so he should.

For all those wondering about how many strange things can happen in one person's life. If I wrote everything down that had happened to me or my family, it reads like a fictional novel but it has all happened. I don't know why and I wish it wouldn't but it does so let's not make judgements about the OP.

What a strange tale.

I can’t imagine what horrendous crime must have been committed for a dying man to be carted off to prison given the situation now where custodial sentences are so rare.
Will the OP ever come back with an update I wonder?

No, definitely not. If your house is your pension then do not put yourself into what might be a difficult situation. Hand on to your investments, once it gas gone you can't get it back. Could they stay with you for a little while until they can sort out something else.

I do apologize mixing names up a senior moment.

janeainsworth

David I am wondering just how much truth of the situation Marydoll either knows or acknowledges
You owe Marydoll an apology.
The OP is marythebookkeeper
I don’t think Marydoll has even posted on this thread.

I don't think that Davidhs can have seen your post janeainsworth , so I am bumping it.

Davidhs

Marydoll has not posted on this thread at all.

Nope. Absolutely not. Maybe give them the weeks rent they will need for a deposit in the private sector. Otherwise no. Citizens Advice will be able to point them in the right direction with claiming benefits/

I have a few thoughts about your situation:
I don't really understand why your sibling hasn't applied for state benefits before now. Surely that would be the first action to take once they became aware of their situation. Does your sibling have any reason for not contacting the government benefits agency or seeking advice from a reliable source? Is there any possibility that your sibling is complicit in the criminal activities of the incarcerated relative and wishes to keep a low profile? It would be wise to ask yourself these questions, particularly if you are considering having your sibling in your home.
If you decide to temporarily house your sibling then it is going put a financial strain on you. Are you going to feed and clothe them? How much more money will you need to cover higher electricity, fuel and council tax bills? If your sibling isn’t able to contribute then you may find you are unable to afford an offer of accommodation in the first place.
To be eligible for state benefits a claimant must have an address. If your sibling moves in with you then they will be able to claim UC but I’m pretty sure that they would not qualify for housing benefits. It is only awarded if the owner lives away from the property. It is also worth considering that once your sibling moved in with you they would no longer be a priority case for local authority housing. This means that private renting would be the only possible way forward.
As everyone has said, you need to put your well-being and security first.

No I wouldn’t

David I am wondering just how much truth of the situation Marydoll either knows or acknowledges
You owe Marydoll an apology.
The OP is marythebookkeeper
I don’t think Marydoll has even posted on this thread.

I am wondering just how much truth of the situation Marydoll either knows or acknowledges. The relative must have been involved in serious crime, the sibling would have known, the bungalow promised might have been taken by the court as proceeds of crime or just to pay a debt. Everything is very vague, criminals tell so many lies and half truths even they don’t know what is true, judge the situation by what you know first hand not what you have been told.

These people may not have 'done anything wrong' but they seem to have a track record of making poor life decisions, if putting all their trust in a person who has turned out to be a criminal is anything to go by.

That would make me very wary of doing what you're thinking of doing. Don't, is my advice.

I would not do it. I have two adult children, and will leave the house to them.
I do find it strange your siblings did not know what was going on.

Just to say that I lent my brother an extremely large amount of money for 6 months. 7 years later I still haven’t had it repaid!
Never lend, just give it you can afford to do so.

MARY THE BOOKKEEPER: I think selling your own home to buy two other, smaller, ones is too hasty a move. People quite often don't tell you everything that is wrong with a house they put up for sale.
Even inspectors can miss things. Besides putting you at future financial risk, it also opens the door to future friction between you and your sibling. If you buy a house for them, there will always be an unspoken feeling of "obligation" being owed to you which can easily taint future interactions between the both of you when disagreements of any nature arise. It just comes with the territory after the "warm glow of relief" has worn off. If you buy two lesser homes and keep both in your name, can you still afford the mortgages, taxes, physical upkeep on both homes? They sure can't because they have no $$$. You will be legally responsible for all major upkeep at least. Who's going to pay for the water pipe that breaks? Who will pay for the furnace repairs when needed? Who will replace the well pump, if the house has well water. Who will pay to have the septic tank emptied if house is not hooked up to town septic? Who is mowing the grass, pruning the shrubs, raking the leaves? You will need additional insurance to guard against possible future injury claims on both properties by the residents and any guests they may have over. (They will make friends and have guests over eventually). Also, your current mortgage will not be divided in half. Both new properties will have different mortgages with today's inflation rates and percentages being applied. You could easily end up paying more per month in total mortgage payments, alone.
It would be cheaper and safer for you if you simply put an additional bedroom on to your current home, if you can. Or buy a pullout queen-sized sofa-bed. You are giving them a temporary haven. Perhaps you don't want to do this because you may be afraid they will be living with you for too long a time and that is why you are considering other ways to "help" both them....and yourself.
Couldn't you simply rent a small apartment for them instead? Even a studio-efficiency type would be fine for now. Take out a small personal loan - or a loan for "improvements" against your own home. Pay whatever the apartment's landlord requires (First, Last, Security). Stock the apartment and move your sibling in there. Whatever is left over from the loan can be immediately repaid with a much shorter time to repay what was used. Since your sibling has no income/savings, you would be paying to get them set up in their new home anyways, so this would not be an additional expense to you if you went this route.

This situation sounds quite complicated. I also say a loud NO to selling your own house and dividing the money. If they come to live with you they might not be able to claim benefits, as you are family. Try to find out if there are alms houses or similar social housing they could qualify for. If they are truly homeless the local council will provide accommodation, but they will need to store their belongings in the meantime.

I would not rely too much on the council. They don't have a duty to rehouse people unless they qualify as priority need, eg under 18, pregnant, vulnerable, etc. It can even be difficult to get rehoused if you do qualify.

If your sibling does think of turning to the council, they need to stay in the area where they have a local connection. They should also stay in their current property until legally forced to leave, or they will be classified as intentionally homeless.

It might be worth suggesting that they approach Shelter or local homeless charities, if there are any. They will get good advice, at the very least.

I loved my late sister dearly. She was a lovely person but, how shall I put it? Fiscally unreliable sums up her approach to life, I guess.
Had her heedless, someone-else-will-pay attitude ever presented me with the sort of problem the OP faces, my answer would have been no, no, and a thousand times no.

I think this is a potential storyline for a novel. Too many holes in it for real life.

You do pose some interesting questions Mary the book keeper
How unlike my own humdrum life

elegran and others my thoughts entirely as with other posts by this author

If your sibling had taken advice before looking after this person, he may well have been warned against following the course which has led to his own financial ruin. The number of unforeseeable twists and turns that could happen are so many, I wouldn't do it.

If a relative asks me to quit my job to take care of him/her with my savings and I would eventually have the bungalow, it would be a super hard no.
It reeks of moocher and indebted servitude

Was there ever legal paperwork drawn to make this official and legally binding?

I'm intrigued too, Callistemon, and would still be interested to hear how the situation is going to right itself at some point in the future.

The more information is given, the more I doubt the sibling is 100% a victim on this.

Very questionable decisions were taken from the very beginning and I guess he many red flags were missed