Dreading arrival of second grandchild AIBU

Hi Ellypat, I know how hard this is, cos in same position, and know the mixed feelings of realising the genuine need for help, in a small family where theres really no one else to help, and feeling no brain space left, exhausted, taken advantage of, trapped. Have looked after dgd last 3 years & ongoing., 3 days a week +. Dd single parent, works full time, estranged from child's father, who lives with them as cant hold a job& not much support. Im now 70, in good health but on my own. Lately, also due to loss of recreational activities, bcos of pandemic, which kept me going & gave me a lift, find it hard to keep going sometimes. Other grans, in their kindness to help, have suggested get it sorted before 2nd baby is born, which would seem to be good advice. Problem is, in the mixture of need and pressure, of stated trust in our ability to look after dgc and the love for our own children, people like us feel powerless to refuse and are made to feel like letting the side down if we refuse. Its love and guilt, all rolled in to one. On the positive, we're close to the dgc. In many ways, its a case of look for the positives. I did try to set boundaries before child born, but no one was listening, as the need for me was too great. It may well be the same for you, though people who are not in the same position of intensity may well not understand. Im here for you. Keep in touch.