Miss, Ms or Mrs

Lucyloo12 The correct title for a divorced woman is Mrs ( her christian name) Surname. That for a widow is still Mrs ( her husband's Christian name) Surname. So you would write to Mrs Mary Smith or Mrs John Smith. Nobody becomes a Miss if they have ever been married. Ms is a matter of preference.
If I were you I would remove your "friend"from your Christmas card list as she doesn't deserve another thought from you. She has been extremely rude.

I am a married woman and always use my name Susan and not Mrs. I address envelopes with first name and surname.

And believe she told you off about it - a simple mention in a conversation would have been good enough

Billybob4491

Lucy you could always send her a curt reply back saying you have crossed her off your Christmas list.

That would be my response. I prefer Ms. The meaning of Mrs by the way is belonging to the man in the name. It is simply missing its apostrophe! However, I would never be rude to someone who addressed me by a different term!

I use Lady of Glencoe on some things now, because it makes my grandchildren laugh after my grandson bought me a teeny square of Scotland! lol. I bought one back for him and we have promised one day we will go together to stand on our squares and wave to one another!! He says he is quite tempted to now call himself Laird!
But anyone questioning a title on a friendly christmas card needs to get their priorities in order, or they may find they aren;t addressed in any way shape or form!

These make great gifts btw lol. www.highlandtitles.com/

Must admit I'm still writing addresses according to the way I was taught when young. Reading this thread, I think it's about time I got myself up to date and just used initials and surname. Much simpler.

My son changed his name to that of his wife when they married. She didn’t want to change her ( much more exotic) surname, so he changed his name, as he believed married people should have the same surname. She now calls herself Mrs Exotic. They have no children ( by choice), but I don’t think that would have made any difference to his decision. His brothers have made more than enough contributions to keep our family name going!

Mrs is short for Mistress!

How sad that she is so easily offended during the season for goodwill. Obviously not a happy lady. I have an elderly distant family member who sends us a card and always addresses it to both of us but using my previous married name - my new husband and I don’t object! It’s send with love and affection and that’s how we receive it.

I didn’t choose to be widowed. I’m still ‘married’ so I’m sticking to Mrs thank you very much. I’m not at all keen on Ms. (Mzzzz). As for your friend OP, if you write to her again, I’d suggest writing all the options from HRH , Princess, Duchess, Dr etc down to Mrs, Miss or Ms and suggest ‘tick as appropriate’

This comment is not a judgement, nor even my own opinion, but a colleague who was our computer Technician always insisted that "Ms" stood for "miserable"!!!!! Take from that what you will!

How rude ! I wouldn’t send her another card , that’s for sure. I think it’s awful though how a title for a woman gives her a back story. There should be the same for men , don’t you think?

Is it necessary to have to explain to anyone why and who you wish to be referred to as .? your business not their's.

Is she your friend? she should have felt lucky to get a Christmas card from you and if she has not sent you one then she should have been thinking about getting one in the post to you. Sounds like an ungrateful lady I would cross her off my card lists.

The whole title thing has turned into a bit of a mine field. I have started just using a whole name without a title if I’m not sure. If my father ever wrote to me from Canada, he would address the envelope to Mrs. and then my husband’s Christian and sur name. It irritated me no end because it made me feel like a chattel. I never mentioned it as I didn’t know him that well. (Long story.). Just for the record, if I was getting married now I would keep my own name.

How silly of her - very over the top. Cross her off your list

I get called Mrs here in Wales by NHS sending appointments but it my fathers surname. After my first marriage I reverted to my fathers surname and because my career was based on that surname with my first name, stayed with it.

My brother is married to my SiL sister in law, who does the same, so anything I address to them is;
Lorna Bedford and David Green, etc.

Well, "Pardon me for not being psychic" should be your equally curt response to her lack of manners. How were you supposed to know? Is she always like this? I wouldn't want someone like this as a friend, frankly. If we can't be kind to each other, etc ...

I’d have told her where to stick it, she should be grateful that you thought to send her a card. Incidentally I work on the rule, over 25 and not with anyone......Ms.

My Daughter combined her Maiden Name with that of her partner, which made a very long Surname indeed. The problem came though when her two children where born, she gave them both three first names, making filling in forms for them quite a problem as there was not space to fit it all into the boxes. When they started School, the teacher advised using a basic shortened version of their Names to make it easier for them to learn, and she agreed to just using DDs first Name, plus her Maiden name, still 15 and 17 letters respectively, but at least half of what it used to be!

My Swedish daughter in law and son call themselves by her mum’s surname plus my son’s surname. It makes for a long name (won’t fit on their passport!) but I think the Swedes do this as a matter of course. I’m always sad that I’ll never be able to trace my childhood friends because their last names have been obliterated by marriage... they won’t find me either to be fair.

I am divorced and refer to myself as Miss. I detest Ms. I have always used my maiden name as well. My children have it as a middle name.

To anyone I know I just put first name(s) and surname(s). I’ve done that for a long time now.

She's lucky she got a card at all!!

I am widowed and always refer to myself as Mrs.
I’m definitely not a Miss.