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Husband wants us to go to live in Portugal

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PinkCosmos Mon 18-May-26 14:15:13

We have been on holiday to Portugal a few times over the last few years. My DH has got it in his head that he wants to go and live there.

I am 66 he is 68. He is retired. I am still working. We don't have good pensions. We have been married for 20 years. I have children from my previous marriage, and now grandchildren. I have one adult child with mental health issues.

He is talking about selling our house and renting in Portugal. We live in a very nice part of the world with lots of things to do locally. However, we never go anywhere or do anything. He has a hobby which takes up quite a bit of his time. I am happy doing things around the home.

The last time we went on holiday to Portugal, I was getting bored by the end of the first week. We had visited other places nearby on previous visit and so didn't visit them again.

My DH seemed happy going for a walk in the morning, sit on the balcony all afternoon and then go out for dinner. I read five books in one week.

DH said it is easy to move out there. All the admin would end up being left to me. We don't have any savings but we would have the money from the house if we sold it.

He has a friend who goes out for weeks at a time but does not live there.

I don't want to live in Portugal. We are both well at the moment but I would worry about health care. I get bored with the sunshine. I would miss my children and grandchildren. I don't like the thought of having no home in the UK. Living there permanently would not be like being on holiday

As a compromise, I would be happy go out there for four or five weeks at a time.

Any advice appreciated. TIA

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Sadgrandma Mon 18-May-26 14:26:44

I think you need to put your foot down and make it absolutely clear that you do not want to move. Give him all the reasons that you have given us. Living somewhere is very different from being on holiday and I suspect he too would soon get bored.

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avitorl Mon 18-May-26 14:37:44

It is not easy to move to Portugal from the UK.My ex husband has bought a house there,given proof of having a reasonable income( I think that there is a minimum requirement) opened a Portugese Bank Account,but still isn't allowed Portugese residency until about 7 years have passed. He has a home in the Uk and has to live between the 2.
He is very happy with the time he spends in Portugal and his Portugese neighbours have been very welcoming and kind to him but it does not appeal to me.

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Witzend Mon 18-May-26 14:45:19

AFAIK you need proof of a certain amount - quite a lot! - of savings if you want to move there. At least that’s what I’ve heard from American friends who were thinking of retiring there, but maybe it’s different for Americans. (They still haven’t gone and escaped the New Hampshire winters!)

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AuntieE Mon 18-May-26 14:53:11

Ask him to find out what health care costs in Portugal, how you would be placed if one or other of you had to move into a care home later on, and whether you will need to pay tax both in Portugal and in your native country.

Finally, whether he wants to be buried in Portugal or not and whether you will both have to re-write your wills to ensure that they are valid in botoh countries.

In Spain an estimate from a tradesman is only binding with regards to cost if it has been notarilized by the public notary, which of course requires you to pay a fee. I do not know if the same applies in Portugal, but it may well.

Finally, you both need to learn the language - English is not spoken automatically by everyone of our ages, or even by professionals (doctors, lawyers, undertakers etc,)

So take a long hard look at the practicalities and make him do so too, before considering a move.

Might a compromise be possible? Spend part of the year in Portugal, part at home?

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avitorl Mon 18-May-26 14:53:17

Witzend, that is the same for any non EU citizens including UK.
Also the weather can be bad there too depending on where you are in Portugal
A positive is that buying a property can be more affordable than the UK

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