Fear for for grandsons prospects

I agree with all those above, in that he sounds like a typical 13 year old. Your son probably has unrealistic expectations and should lighten up a bit!

If your GS is an only child he is probably verbally sparring with his father in the way he would with siblings if he had them (and that is highly annoying too!).
Very sensible advice on here from experienced Grans (as always). ?

I would carry on keeping my mouth shut, it’s normal, please don’t treat your Grandson any differently than you would if he wasn’t just being a 13 year old..

We love them no matter what stage of their life they are at, they will come through the other side with your love and support.

13, would expect nothing else, my son was a nightmare for a few years too, friends with similar aged children had the same challenges. He’ll grow out of it, eventually!

He's 13. He is able to be like that because his father has given him a level of "emotional safety" in his family to kick against.

Suggest that your son googles "talking to your teenager" and " understanding your teenager" ...lots of good advice and tips. Might be helpful for you too

Our almost 14 year old grandson is quite bright but very lazy. As DS observes, if he put half the effort into doing the work set that he puts into explaining why he shouldn’t be expected to do it, he would be fine. DS is genuinely baffled by this approach but has learned not to sweat the small stuff and hopes that self interest will motivate better things in time. At present, he expects DGS to be either an estate agent or a con man - lots of charm but a tendency to try to take the easy way.

Actually I think it's better if this period happens early, my rebellion/pain in the but stage was late teens/twenties, it took me longer to 'catch up' to where I wanted to be.

13 is a difficult age! My girls were a nightmare! They are all adult women now with families of their own and degrees etc
I wouldn't leap to worrying about him

He’s 13! Can you remember how you were at that age?!
With a bit of patience this stage will pass.

autumnsun You are describing a perfectly ordinary normal 13 year old. At that age almost everyboy is bolshie, lazy and generally irritating. It is called puberty or hormones gone mad. Do you not remember Harry Enfield playing Kevin the teenager? If not look him up on youtube.

Tell your son to relax and just ride it through. Nothing he casn do will have any effect on the boy, have a few unbreakable rules and then just ride it out.

By the time he reaches 18 or 19, you will have a pleasant hardworking grandson again.

Bide your time. My DS from 14 on was impossible and bone idle. He’s a happily married father of two and has a good job now.

I think it's really difficult to judge whether there is a problem or he is just being 13. My brother wasted his time in his o levels as were, he did no work, wouldnt listen to anyone and failed them. He is now a scientist. Some people do need time to mature and work out what they want. I think the best thing you can do is be a loving supportive presence. It is good that your son is talking to you so maybe just be a listening ear for the time being.