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Do you wonder how much time you have left?

(118 Posts)
Foxglove77 Fri 26-Mar-21 18:50:10

Without being morbid and in my late 50s I have been wondering how much time I may have left. 20 more Christmases? I know nothing is a given and I am grateful for the life I've had so far, but am just interested to know if this has crossed your mind and what your thoughts are?

Jac53 Sun 28-Mar-21 12:37:54

I definitely think about it when I'm around my two lovely grandchildren and I worry about my husband who, at 80, has chronic illnesses. I am 67 but my mother died at 57 and when I approached that milestone I was terrified the same fate would befall me, so much so that I pestered Drs until I got tests to prove I didn't have the same condition. My father lived til 95 but had dementia in the last few years and that scares me more than dying.

Greeneyedgirl Sun 28-Mar-21 12:01:00

Another Humanist here Urmstongran. I don’t think it’s morbid to think about dying, it’s part of being human, but it’s something which has become a taboo and scary subject in our society. I think since Covid struck it occupies the mind more.

Would life be as sweet if we knew we would live for ever? Life is so precious, even during lockdown, knowing that it is time limited, makes it more so to me.

DiscoDancer1975 Sun 28-Mar-21 11:23:51

Not really, most of the time, but after filling out the census last week, my husband said, ‘ “ I wonder if we’ll be doing that again!” ‘. We’re 61 and 62.

Blossoming Sun 28-Mar-21 11:20:25

Foxglove I don’t think it’s a horrible thread but it is a subject some people shy away from. It frightens them to think about it.

I was forced to confront my own mortality at a relatively young age, so it’s just something I live with. I’m not constantly thinking about it but I have made sure that Mr. B won’t have lots of hassle to sort out when it happens. Having organised all that I can forget all about it and get on with life.

I remember having a pre-op chat with my surgeon. He said he was expecting the surgery to be a complete success but he was worried about my recovery. I said he could look after the surgery and I would handle the recovery. And here I am many years later grin

silverlining48 Sun 28-Mar-21 10:36:40

My pleasure Grandma jet. Have a nice day and hope the coming sunshine brings us all some much needed cheer.

grandmajet Sat 27-Mar-21 22:42:59

Thank you silverlining, for the ?. I’ve put them in water and they look lovely.

TrendyNannie6 Sat 27-Mar-21 20:39:17

Yes I’ve thought about it, but only since been in lockdown not to the degree of being concerned as I don’t suffer from anxiety more to the point of maybe I should get off my bum and clear out some of these books I’ve got now I’ve got a lot of time on my hands, and go through all these cupboards of mine,

Foxglove77 Sat 27-Mar-21 20:34:05

Nadateturbe thank you smile

silverlining48 Sat 27-Mar-21 20:30:17

Grandmajet flowers

silverlining48 Sat 27-Mar-21 20:28:17

grin no problem Urms, am supposed to be on a diet

Jaxjacky Sat 27-Mar-21 20:25:10

I’m with you Urmstongran as for any surmising, or vast overthinking on time left I’m la, la, la fingers in ears.

nadateturbe Sat 27-Mar-21 20:24:02

I don't think it's a horrible post, Foxglove. Thank you for starting the thread. It's something we all think about, some more than others. But for some reason it's almost a taboo subject in our society, which is strange, because it's very much a part of life. There are things we would like to say to our families before it happens and sometimes people would just like to be able to talk about their thoughts. But we are afraid of upsetting others, or we are told not to be morbid.
It's good that people have been able to share, and find out how others feel..

Urmstongran Sat 27-Mar-21 20:20:49

Oops! Sorry silverlining I didn’t realise that delicious slice of red velvet was yours! Is there any more?
?

silverlining48 Sat 27-Mar-21 20:08:51

Where is my cake?????

silverlining48 Sat 27-Mar-21 20:08:24

Since turning 70 thoughts of mortality came uninvited and now nearly 73 am wondering how long health will hold up to live an active life, so much to do, places to go.
Covid has put everything on hold and we dont have as much time as we always thought we had.
Its best not to dwell,
but if I do I feel sad that we probably won't see gc marry, or even graduate, they are still so very young.
Now I really do need to cheer up. wine[cake]flowersgrin

Witzend Sat 27-Mar-21 18:50:19

My mother came from a large and long-lived family - she often used to say, ‘Good stock!’ and went on herself to 97, but then she’d had Alzheimer’s since her early 80s, so the long-lived-ness was far from an unmixed blessing.

She broke a hip at 90 or 91 - often the beginning of the end at that sort of age - and the anaesthetist at the op to fix it apparently said, ‘Boy, this is one tough old bird!’ because her vital signs were so robust.

I’m sure her former self would have preferred to be less tough rather than suffer the indignities of later stage dementia, though. Not that she cared at the time, but we cared for her.

I certainly know which I’d prefer.

Foxglove77 Sat 27-Mar-21 18:40:38

Thank you everyone for your thoughts. Its comforting to know that this subject crosses other people's minds too. I admire all those who have optimistic replies and positive thoughts. Lucca I'm sorry you found this a horrible post, it was not meant to upset anyone. I'd rather think of the subject as reflective.

Gossamerbeynon1945 Sat 27-Mar-21 18:14:05

Urmstongran I understand what you are saying. I was brought up in a very Christian household (Welsh Baptists) - everyone believed in God. Now I am having huge doubts, as in why is my life like this, do I deserve it?

Urmstongran Sat 27-Mar-21 17:16:22

It must indeed be a comfort if one is religious and believes our spirits go up to Heaven to re-unite with loved souls. Sadly I don’t. I’m a Humanist and so there’s a good and a sad way to look at life from my point of view.

The good way is that I believe this life is all we have. It really does focus my thoughts and nudge me to be as kind and sensitive with people as I can be. Like a leaf on a tree, we have a limited time on this earth.

Obviously the sad part is my belief that there is no ‘more’. We don’t meet up again, ever again. This is it. Which in turn, bring me back in a circle to being kind and loving whilst I’m here.

Billybob4491 Sat 27-Mar-21 16:14:01

No I never think about it, I am in God's hands.

AGAA4 Sat 27-Mar-21 15:52:05

I think more about not being able to do the things I like doing - driving, reading, walking.

My husband died when he was 51 and has missed such a lot. Never got to see his GCs or our youngest daughter grow up.

I have had over 20 years more and just try to enjoy each day.

Gossamerbeynon1945 Sat 27-Mar-21 14:54:27

lived until she was 99

Gossamerbeynon1945 Sat 27-Mar-21 14:53:24

I do think about this. My mother was so young when she died (39) and so was my dad (47). My maternal grandmother lied until she was 99.

I have made a will and have LPA for my husband who has had a stroke. He cannot speak at all, so life gets lonely.

I would love to die in my sleep, and have a DNR with my GP. I remember saying to my daughter, who is a nurse, that I hated getting old. She replied "well it's better than the alternative".

I am 75, 76 this year.

lovebeigecardigans1955 Sat 27-Mar-21 14:50:01

Sometimes I wonder. A friend is doing the 'Swedish Death Clean' which sounds terribly morbid and she's younger than me. This basically means that she's having a good clear out so that her children aren't faced with lots of possessions, craft materials, etc which must be dealt with when the time comes.
We mustn't worry too much about death, rather concentrate on enjoying life as best we can in the meantime.

hulahoop Sat 27-Mar-21 14:22:47

I would love to see what my grandchildren turn out like but I don't think I will see them into adulthood ,we were late stating a family and so were my children .I do think about it especially after having cancer .