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Advice needed

(19 Posts)
Shelbel Tue 28-Dec-21 19:51:03

My father was always cold due to heart disease. I think he needs a check up.

Jaxjacky Tue 28-Dec-21 19:43:51

I took my Mum to her GP, she had mentioned some hip niggles, the GP was quick on the uptake, did a mini memory test, mum was referred.

Teacheranne Tue 28-Dec-21 19:36:28

humptydumpty

SandraF could you email your husband's surgery voicing your concerns?

I wrote a letter to my mums doctor when we were concerned, I kept it very brief with bullet points detailing specific incidents. I thought a letter might be better than an email, not sure why but it worked. The surgery called her in for a blood test and did a memory test at the same time.

CBT61 Tue 28-Dec-21 19:19:38

Sorry- put that in the wrong place!

CBT61 Tue 28-Dec-21 19:05:08

Elderly parent alarm
My mum is 85 and lives alone 3 hours away from us. She doesn’t want to move closer or admit strangers into her home. She is very independent and there is no reason why she should move but we are both concerned in case she has a fall. She has an iPhone and WiFi and a landline. There is a side door with a key safe but she doesn’t want to give the code to anyone but me as she is very keen to NOT be taken to hospital or to be resuscitated and doesn’t trust anyone else to follow her wishes.
Does anyone know of an app or red button thingy that would just alert family and not an agency or the emergency services?

DiscoDancer1975 Tue 28-Dec-21 18:25:27

He may not want to go to his GP, but I would, just in the first instance. He/ she won’t be able to discuss him with you...but can listen to your concerns. It shouldn’t matter that you go to different surgeries.

I remember my dad doing this with my mum. He was worried, so talked to the GP on his own. It turned out it was the medication my mum was taking, and the GP was able to quickly reassure my dad.

Does he take blood pressure tablets? These can make you feel cold...particularly feet. Whatever the cause...I think the GP is the first best bet.

Sago Tue 28-Dec-21 18:15:19

Some of the symptoms you describe, particularly feeling cold could be related to an under active thyroid.

kittylester Tue 28-Dec-21 18:02:43

Ring the surgery in the afternoon and explain your concerns. You should get a call back and be able to speak more fully. They probably won't talk to you about him but they should listen.

And, if all else fails, contact Dementia UK, The Alzheimer's Society or AgeUk for advice.

humptydumpty Tue 28-Dec-21 17:44:08

SandraF could you email your husband's surgery voicing your concerns?

SandraF Tue 28-Dec-21 17:32:55

Unfortunately we go to different practices so I couldn't ask for a well being check for both of us. His practice is one of those where you can only ring each day at 8am for an appointment that day (along with all the other people on redial). Even if I got through I'm not sure how to broach it with the triage/reception ist especially as he doesn't seem to have insight into his problems.

sodapop Tue 28-Dec-21 17:04:45

That sounds like a good solution BlueBelle hope it will work for you SandraF.
It is a very difficult situation to live with.

MerylStreep Tue 28-Dec-21 17:03:52

The trouble with a doctors assessment is when the doctor sees the patient on a good day.
I support a neighbour who is obviously in the early stages of this awful disease. Her daughter got her to surgery but unfortunately this was one of her good days.
He wasn’t there a few days later when I got a call from her telling me that her gardener ( she hasn’t got one) had stolen her bank statements.

BlueBelle Tue 28-Dec-21 16:49:27

When my friend thought her husband may have dementia she spoke to the doctor first and asked if they could both go for a well being check bearing in mind her concerns they did and the doctor saw for himself and referred him on
He’s does have Alzheimer’s and is now on medication

Barmeyoldbat Tue 28-Dec-21 16:10:02

Yes I would say get his thyroid checked, that could be a good excuse for seeing a Dr as well

B9exchange Tue 28-Dec-21 15:57:30

Has he put on weight? Might be worth checking for a thyroid problem.

Elizabeth27 Tue 28-Dec-21 15:25:30

Depending on how good your GP is you could contact the surgery expressing your concerns and ask them to call him in for a routine health assessment.

Septimia Tue 28-Dec-21 15:21:59

If you think it will be difficult to get him to see the GP, maybe suggesting that he see the GP about being cold will get around the problem. It may sound less threatening to him and, if you go with him (no reason why you shouldn't, my mum always went with my dad) you can raise the other problems.

kittylester Tue 28-Dec-21 14:59:13

Your best bet is to get the gp to see him metioingyiur concerns.

SandraF Tue 28-Dec-21 14:42:06

Advice please

My DH has never been an easy man to cope with, we have lived a quiet life as he finds socialising difficult with people with whom he has nothing in common and he makes little conversation with me. I believe he has been showing mild signs of dementia for several years- making inappropriate remarks, poor memory, losing ability to comprehend a map (which he was always good at, flying off the handle easily etc. In the last year there seems to have been a lot of deterioration particularly around memory problems, confusion about calendar activities days and months and problems with technology around the home- eg operating TV /hard drive recorder remote controls, laptop, kitchen equipment. He is irritable and easily angered. Also complaining about being cold all the time and wanting house heated excessively. Consequently I feel I'm walking on eggshells and try to get out of the house as often as I can. He doesn't seem to have any insight into his problems and I can't imagine him wanting to contact his GP. So where do I go from here?