Are You A Negative Person

I agree with Missadventure there is a difference between a worrier and a pessimist. I like to think I am more an optimist but as I get older I have become more of a realist as life with its ups and downs has made me that way but I do really try to be a cup half full person

I live with a negative person and it's draining given that I am a realist with some pretty bad experiences behind me that I have had to cheerfully and relentlessly overcome.

The DH seems to have picked up the idea that it is clever to be the one who's always correct (he certainly isn't) and who has the right to blame and criticise everyone and everything else.

I can usually stand about five rants about, say, the BBC, the binmen, potholes, other drivers, things that break or go wrong in the house and then I have to say something.

Then there will be denial and self justification.

Point out anything he has done wrong and, oh boy, fireworks ensue.

I'm definitely a positive person. I always expect things to turn out well, though it doesn't always happen, of course.
When I went to see my GP with a really bad pain in my side, and he told be to go straight to A & E I just assumed that it was nothing, and didn't even take my toothbrush with me.
It turned out to be a cyst on my bowel, which was ready to burst. Luckily 5 days in hospital, and antibiotics, put me right.
"Never trouble trouble, 'til trouble troubles you" is a good motto, but worriers can't always help themselves.

Sawsage2

I usually have a smile on my face, even though I've been disabled for 4 years and use a mobility scooter but I refuse to let it depress me.

Snap!

Positive, realist, things happen, sometimes out of your control.. however I’m not blind I can walk I have lived longer than a lot of people that die young, that’s a massive positive… and life will continue to be positive with a few or sometimes a lot thrown in…and I do have many negatives in my life I just chose to look
For the positives x

Wow that thread opened up a can of worms didn't it )

Lots saying your DH is the opposite so obviously it must be true opposite attract

I liked it wen one post said the positive about being negative is the only way is up !! True ..Absolutely Brilliant ?

I think of myself of being positive, but Im probably hovering in between!

Another like Curlywhirly here. If I’m a bit quiet I’m asked what’s wrong, no one realises that they’re seeing the real me.

Have to add, thinking positive thoughts that all will be fine, is more important than putting negative ones thoughts, what you put your positive thoughts on can really make a difference

A friend told me that I am a very positive person although that’s not how I see myself!

I think we are all half empty or half full many times, but just concentrate on what you are grateful for in you life just now, try not to think about the past or future, live in the moment, that is enough for anyone and it’s all we have any control over to a certain extent

I’m the same curlywhirly.

I am always optimistic, even through the many low times in my life. I’m still standing (with a glass of wine in my hand!)

I'm not now religious but was brought up in the Church of Scotland. A few Bible quotations stick.

I have considered any time I have had beyond my "three score years and ten" has been a bonus.

I have probably appreciated these years in my seventies more than my younger years which I took for granted.

There’s some sad souls here on this thread! I’ve found being a little bit negative in your 50’s turns into quite a bit negative as we reach our 60’s and 70’s……and a reasonably positive outlook in your 50’s turns into “ take life as it comes and enjoy it” type of retirement in our 60’s and 70’s. Our attitude through life is a series of choices, but once set in a pattern of either positive or negative then it turns into our default mode when we reach our 60’s 70’s and beyond.

No way! I’m very positive! The only thing negative about me is my blood group AB Rhesus Neg! My glass is always half full ?

I see I am not alone, in that I am constantly positive but my DH is always so negative. He drives me mad with his comments on a daily basis!

Well. I'm a Libran and becoming more so as the decades pass! It probably may seem to others that I am 'glass half empty' as I weigh out the pros and cons of life! I'm 80 now and life has thrown some pretty horrid stuff at me, but also it has given me so much for which to be grateful (see the balancing going on) so if I'm having a 'down' day I tell myself that things will be better tomorrow. And equally if I'm happy now I try not to remind myself that this too might change tomorrow. It's all about learning acceptance and gratitude so that the glass is always nicely balanced at half full. (And my Libran mind makes me point out that if it seems half empty you can always find a way to top it up).

I agree that to have a positive outlook you don’t have to be unrealistic Applegran and you are probably happier. Indeed true we cannot control much of what happens, but our responses can change.
This is why I don’t believe our personality is fixed and we can learn to change for example a tendency to worry constantly.
We have such a short time on this earth, might as well learn to enjoy and appreciate what we have.

Yes, I'm a pessimist- over my lifetime I have found that if I hope for something good I get wacked in the face by bad luck...so hope for the worst and it won't hurt as much

I'm a glass half empty person but, I'm sure if the world in it's current state suddenly changed to being a bit more upbeat, it might be easier to be more positive. Mind you, cheery people who say "Oh, you've got to be more positive" really annoy me.

My wife accuses me of being negative because I consider Boris Johnson and other Brexiteers lying traitors. I can forgive those voted to leave as they could well have been duped by those who promoted vote.leave. However since that wretched referendum I have yet to see a single Brexit benefit. As for Putin he is just plain evil. I'm sorry if feeling that the current state of affairs makes me seem negative, powerless and hopeless maybe but I am positive about many things I believe to be right.

Mark Twain said something to the effect "I've had many problems in my life - and a few of them were real!" There is lots of evidence that optimists don't have to be unrealistic but tend to be happier and healthier. I was interested in people saying they had been helped to have more positive thoughts - great to look for help and be ready to make changes.. I have moved steadily towards optimism and gratitude for what I have as I've got older. We cannot control much of what happens to and around us - but our thoughts and attitudes can be changed and are in our power to change. I wish those who are having a hard time or have negative thoughts a happier way ahead. Writing a gratitude diary makes a huge difference! Just a few minutes writing down what you are grateful for today, every day, can do a lot for your happiness.

I'm a realist. I learned years ago that 'happy ever after' happened mostly in fairy tales. If you're glass is always half empty, maybe you're playing with the wrong size glass. Pie-in-the sky expectations often lead to disappointment.

I totally get how you feel Theodora p . I’m definitely a lot more negative about life than I used to be. I try to catch myself doing it as much as possible , as I don’t want to bring other people down. My kids had a standing joke about ‘mum making it dark again’
And I though ?I’ve become a drag

I think it’s because, I’m struggling about getting older and I worry about my family and my future.
I find myself focusing on old age and dying and financial issues a lot.

Not worrying about the future and feeling like anything is what I miss most about being young. X