Am I right to be upset?

I think I would have been inclined to say ' I may look pregnant, but at least I could lose some weight, unfortunately you will be stuck with that face'. Possibly add that you can be rude and cutting too. I cannot stand people like this woman and Ive met more than a few due to a skin condition I have. Give it right back and they soon get the message. Many people mistake politeness for weakness, big mistake.

My MIl was just like this, she once told me I should get my very light blonde moustache removed, I retorted if I had one like yours I would wear a paper bag on my head. She was not amused but still continued on. She also told me that after my lovely father died young I was the only one upset at the funeral. I pointed out they had to open the doors to the chapel extension to accommodate everyone.
I think Pepper 59 is right many people mistake politeness for weakness. I had to change my attitude very quickly.

Your figure sounds perfect to me. No matter that you have a tummy. I bet your husband cannot see it.
Her spiteful comment suggests she’s jealous of you. Dismiss it and her as unimportant. Who cares what she thinks?
What a cracking comment AGAA4. I wish I’d thought of that!

You could have said "at least I can lose weight if I so wish, you are stuck with your rude and arrogant personality"

My mother used to make personal remarks like that. I took her up on it many times and she did not learn. She thought it was her "right" as a parent. That was the reason I eventually went no contact.

The next time you see her try saying, Does making rude remakes come naturally to you?

Or do you have to work at it?

I think sensitive people are usually the nicest to know.

I would avoid her as much as possible.

She is a truly nasty human being.

I always think you say to someone who tells you are "too sensitive" answer well that must make you thoroughly insensitive, poor you !!

Mean old bat, rude and completely unnecessary comment. Does she have form for this sort of thing?

My daughter was criticized after her wedding for wearing the "wrong" wedding dress.

She wore a beautiful meringue-style strapless dress - her dream. Her ma-in-law told her her arms were too beefy and she should have worn an empire line!

I am sure those who are horribly cruel/rude comes from their own insecurities. Schadenfreude minds.

I think some old women vo like this as a type of predementia . Its like they lose the filter that stops them being rude . Maybe you could point that out to her ! She probably is jealous as well and wants to extert a last ditch kind of self importance over you.

Thank you everyone! Yes, I’ve been married to her son for 36 years, we have 3 beautiful, successful children and one very gorgeous grandson. My husband was not in the room and YES she has been like this for all those years! You’d think I’d get used to it….but unfortunately every time she gets to me. I have a hidden disability, but she actually said I was lazy for using my blue badge! I’m going to keep my distance…..feel rubbish enough at the moment without her comments!

I wish women would stop commenting on other women's looks, good or bad.
You don't see men doing it to the same extent.
Your mil sounds like a very shallow person who judges other women purely on their looks.

Really not nice comment I would feel upset too.

How rude! Tell her that you are actually pregnant with twins and will be relying on her for babysitting.

Why don't you just have it out with her and tell her how much she has upset you with her nasty comments over the years and your not going to take anymore.. What have you got to lose...She sounds like a bully and obviously knows she is getting to you...I would totally dis her....I'm sure your hubby will stand by your decision...He probably knows what's shes like...

Hi Frufru ,

I bet that you looked super at the wedding and she's jealous !
How cruel of your MIL .
What a nasty and thoroughly vindictive comment .
She's managed to make you feel unhappy and insecure .
You can laugh it off and pretend that it doesn't hurt ,throw something about which she's sensitive back ,tell her to her face that she's insulting or distance yourself from her .

Why do MILs do this ?
One of my friends hasn't spoken to her MIL for months ,because she criticised her weight .
She is overweight ,but has escalating health problems and is a fantastic cook . Actually her cooking is Mediterranean in style and healthy .
They live in the same house !

Imagine !

I had awful in law's they treated my late husband and me appalling . We had only been married a year my father in law say to me your to fat lose weight and I will give you £1 for every pound you lose. My husband and I walked out their house.

But my darling man would never give up on his parents. So we went back every week. They only thing we did right in the eyes of my father in-law was have the children. Unfortunately he died when they were 4 and 8 months. My mother in law took against our daughter from when she was a baby was all our son until he had a mind of his own.

Unfortunately my husband died in 2004. I put up with my mother in law's appalling behaviour from 1975 until 2015 when she died. Why you may ask because I loved my husband and she was his mother therefore family. May be an old fashioned view but I was brought up with a strong sense of family. Even if some where evil.

I think my comment would be
"have you ever had a good look at yourself in the mirror, you are no model yourself"
Someone who is so rude to make such a comment must be a really horrible person.
If you can't say something positive don't say anything I say.

I wonder when people make comments like that they think they are being amusing….which they are not of course.

Before I married I was about a size 16 - 18 and when me and my now husband went to north wales to meet his relatives , were quite a few, they were all sitting around for tea and this old boy said to me ‘ I can see you have more than half an hour for lunch’ ….I was gob smacked and remembered I went red as a beetroot and totally lost for words….people just don’t think sometimes….

Some people like dishing it out but can't take it back....
She sounds awfully tactless.

Had that said to me a few times, I had triplets and was left with a large tummy I can't get rid of without surgery which isn't for me plus my age after menopause, my answer used to be flattered you think I look young enough to be pregnant, of course now at 70 I don't get that comment

I try to be nice and watch my Ps and Qs when I’m with d.I.ls. You can’t do right for doing wrong. We were just talking names they gave their children, and not one of them has named one of their children after a member of my family. So I mentioned it because I was sad . I have accepted it now. All my grandchildren, have at least one middle name, from their maternal side. I know my family’s place in the pecking order?

How rude that was of her. I’m sorry that she hurt your feelings. Next time tell it was harsh.

I’ve had comments made mainly by colleagues, on the fact that I’m short. They were absolutely right of course, so I just replied “You are right there!” which put an end to the conversation swiftly. It seems to be OK to mention lack of height by all and sundry.