Should I interfere with son's relationship

Greg37, why are you even asking this? You must know that interfering in any way at all is out of the question.

Good advice .

You really can't interfere in your son's life ... he won't thank you for it .
If he neglects his new girlfriend and she leaves him - he'll learn the hard way .
There is absolutely nothing that you can do about it .

We were all devastated when my son's long term girlfriend and he rowed and they split up .
It was only supposed to be a break from each other as they tried to work out a compromise .
Her family were great too .
We were all friends .

She didn't want work in this country despite the offers and he couldn't find ANY work in her country
- that's why .
There is massive unemployment there .
She can only find work in a coffee bar not using her degree .

No other reason .

It took him a very long time to come to terms with it .
I don't think that he's ever got over it .
And he's never really been happy with his current girlfriend .

Please leave them to get on with their lives' they will not thank you for interfering with their relationship.

It's not your place to interfere. He's bug enough to make his own mistakes and sort out his own problems.

If he comes to you for advice, then you can listen and say the decisions are his to make.

Whatever our children's age, as a mother it's hard to stand back and see them going down the wrong roads. But they have to learn to get on the right road by experiencing these things without subjective interference.

Bluntly: mind your own business. This is nothing to do with you and if you try to push him in a direction he's hesitant to take, you risk alienating him.

You've already made your comments and received an answer.
Leave it at that.

I agree with everyone who has responded. You need to stay out of this Greg your son is an adult and if hasn't done so already, needs to learn how behave in his relationships.

Sometimes lessons have to be learned the hard way, and a 30 something year old is too old to be taught these lessons by a parent and has to learn them for himself.

I've got sons. I learned long ago to never interfere in their personal lives. So they are still nice to me.

Would you have wanted your mother to start telling you how you should conduct your relationships?

You want to help as you love your son ... simple answer is no ... whatever happens if you interfere you will possibly get the blame ... just be there for him whatever happens , although don't comment if things ho wrong

Yes of course you should interfere with your son's relationship. Nothing wrong with that statement at all.
(Just thought I would add a spot of variety into this topic, which surely isn't serious)

Do be silent.
My neighbour is now estranged from her son because she couldn’t be keep her thoughts to herself.

You should have stepped away at 20 not be asking at 30 poor chap

Stay out of it and definitely don’t ask his girlfriend for coffee! What a barmy idea!

No! Leave him to his life . You are obviously finding it difficult to step away - but step away you must. Please do that and I wish you well.

NO!!

Summerlove

Stay so far out of it.

Your instincts are kind - but neither of them will thank you for interfering.

I agree

As a parent, you should NEVER be getting involved in your children's relationships and as an AC you should NEVER be asking your parents to get involved in your relationships.

A parent's instinct is to protect a child. That's normal. That's okay. That's what parents are supposed to do. But it also means that parents are not objective third parties when it comes to their children.

If your son and his partner are having issues, it's for them to sort out - without you.

You already know the answer

May I ask why you are asking a forum if you should interfere?

You already know you are not sugar coating this by calling it helping, guiding or assisting your son

NO NO NO not your business ….he’s 30 leave him be to do what ever is right for them if it goes pearshape it wasn’t meant to be

Thank you all. I appreciate the advice. It's so hard standing by and leaving them to live their lives isn't it at 30 you shouldn’t even know what he’s doing let alone monitoring his relationships even with the best will in the world
Let go

Um no, he’s a grown up.

No not really. You had your turn to make choices. It’s his now.

Thank you all. I appreciate the advice. It's so hard standing by and leaving them to live their lives isn't it.

No no no. Keep out. Unless of course you want him living with you forever more?