Present suggestions for sister recently diagnosed with cancer

What about an experience voucher, something she can do with her husband? But something not too taxing, in case the chemo is leaving her less energy than usual.

Maybe a walking with alpacas experience if she's fit enough. It's supposed to be very relaxing and good for lifting one's spirits.

A voucher is definitely a good idea. M&S?

My husband is Stage 4 and has been since 2016 so please don’t write her off yet! Before 2016 he was Stage 3 since 2013.

My Cousin was diagnosed with stage four lung cancer in August last year. He has been getting immunotherapy treatment and his cancer has been shrinking bit by bit over the months since.
I agree with Oldbat, don't write her off yet.

Do you have a budget?

How about a lovely fine cashmere type shawl or wrap if your budget will stand it? It will be like a warm hug every time she uses it. And it will come in so useful to keep her upper body cosy when she needs hospital treatment or when sitting up in bed.

I agree with those who say, "don't write her off too soon". I also was given a terminal diagnosis, and thought the very worse. I am still here almost two years later. A bit more wobbly, but still here.

GrannyLaine's suggestion of a beautiful soft wrap sounds lovely. Also, maybe a voucher for an aromatherapy massage. They can be relaxing and also uplifting if done by the right person.
Best wishes to your sister for her future treatment.

Auntieflo

I agree with those who say, "don't write her off too soon". I also was given a terminal diagnosis, and thought the very worse. I am still here almost two years later. A bit more wobbly, but still here.

GrannyLaine's suggestion of a beautiful soft wrap sounds lovely. Also, maybe a voucher for an aromatherapy massage. They can be relaxing and also uplifting if done by the right person.
Best wishes to your sister for her future treatment.

A cashmere blanket,hat,gloves or socks would make me very happy.

I agree with Auntie Flo’s suggestion

All of you saying don’t write her off yet, it’s not me! She has got it into her head that she’s doomed to not live to get her pension in 2 years and she is talking about not leaving her husband to sort out her stuff! I keep telling her that my old next door neighbour is still driving at 93 and he had lung cancer 15 years ago. Thanks for the suggestions. I had thought of vouchers for M&S because she likes their food. Also holiday cottage vouchers as she says she wants to go to Scotland one last time.

How about a 2 day residential retreat at Penny Brohn Centre in Bristol which has many beautiful therapies, advise and special meals for people with cancer. It also has lovely gardens

Lizzies

All of you saying don’t write her off yet, it’s not me! She has got it into her head that she’s doomed to not live to get her pension in 2 years and she is talking about not leaving her husband to sort out her stuff! I keep telling her that my old next door neighbour is still driving at 93 and he had lung cancer 15 years ago. Thanks for the suggestions. I had thought of vouchers for M&S because she likes their food. Also holiday cottage vouchers as she says she wants to go to Scotland one last time.

Lizzies that may be her way of dealing with the devastating news she has been given. I think I might react in a similar way, putting all my affairs in order. No one can know what lies ahead but we can take control of the things we are able to.

pascal30

How about a 2 day residential retreat at Penny Brohn Centre in Bristol which has many beautiful therapies, advise and special meals for people with cancer. It also has lovely gardens

The Penny Brohn centre is wonderful. And provides very helpful support in facing up to and considering all options after such a diagnosis. I recommend it unreservedly

I'd be inclined to try to get her to engage with life, not encouraging her to be considering herself an invalid and think about death. You night need to be subtle about it, though!

might need!

Lizzies sorry about your sisters diagnosis. I hope she has joined a support group for fellow lung cancer patients. They will help her see that stage 3 doesn't mean she will die soon. Don't know if you know but cancer has 5 grades that is what we where told when my husband was diagnosed with grade 4 malignant melanoma. Grade 1-2 after treatment you should make a full recovery. Grade 3 50-50 chance of living 5 years. Grade 4-5 you won't live beyond 5 years.

These are my experiences I am by means an expert. My husband was grade 4 malignant melanoma he had his diagnosis in January 2001. Had the tumour completely removed. Didn't need chemo or radiotherapy. October 2003 he was told he was terminal and given 4 months to 2 years. He died February 2004 aged 47.

My husband had palative chemo. We had a A4 sheet of side effects the only 2 side effects my husband had was he lost he's sense of taste and became impotent. The 2 side effects he didn't want. As food and sex where what he loved.

My mom had grade 1-2 breast cancer 2000 had an mastectomy and lymph nodes removed had tablet for 5 years know what it was called can't think how it's spelt. She was 73. When she was 86 had grade 3 breast cancer and had second breast removed didn't want chemo but had 15 doses of radiotherapy she lived until she was 90.

If your sister talks to other lung cancer patients she will find advice ,support and friendship. Yes there will be tears but laughter as well.

Chemo has many side effects but my husband only had the 2 . He didn't lose any hair,mouth ulcers he wasn't even sick. But because the chemo going into his vein was uncomfortable the nurses used to heat up a microwave wheat bag and put on his arm where the needle went in and it helped him.

You ask what to give your sister as a present the best thing is to give her hope and help her live her life to the full. Until you get the terminal diagnosis she must live as normal life as her treatments allow.

You can live a normal life my husband did . Only we and our 2 children knew he wouldn't live 5 years. As he didn't want to be treated any differently to normal as far as everyone else was concerned he would be fine. We lived with the sword of Damocles hanging over us. But my darling man lived his life to the full . We lived like a normal family he didn't want cancer to dominate our lives. Even when he was given the terminal notice he carried on working but after 6 weeks I had to stop him. Even though he was given 4 months to 2 years we knew he had months. He set himself a goal to reach his 47th birthday and he did . He died 4 days later at home with me and the children. He lived just under the 4 months he was given.

I am assuming your sister will have radiotherapy if she does it's very important she only uses Simple soap , shampoo and shower gel. As other products can cause an adverse reaction on her skin. Plus she will need to use plenty of again can't think how to spell the cream but it begins with an A it isn't expense and but it in 500g tubs from Boots but it keeps the skin well moisturised and that helps with the radiotherapy. My mom's skin looked like she had a pale pink rash because she got through tubs of the cream.

This probably doesn't really answer your question but I hope it shows a way to help your sister realise there is life even with a cancer diagnosis.

It's called Aqueous cream 500g £3.59 from Boots.

I also think a lovely soft wrap I was always cold when having chemo .Other option a pamper day .

A warm wrap sounds lovely.

Just to add that my friend is a regular customer at her ,ocal beauty salon. I bought a voucher for a manicure.
She could book it when she felt well enough and it gave her an hour of pampering close to home. so no navigating to worry about.