Wedding invite

GrannyGravy13

I would go to the ceremony, wedding breakfast and leave probably around 8/8.30pm

Yes, that’s exactly what we do too.
Leave about an hour and a half after the meal.
I think that to not go to the ceremony could be seen as rude.
To me, it’s far and away the most important part

We usually do the ceremony and the breakfast. When we run out of steam, we just go off to our hotel or home.

It's a bit rude to miss the ceremony, and just turn up for the food. 🙂

We have had sandwiches served at our kids weddings to bridge that gap. Cost about £140 and was worth every penny. People should definitely think about this as it’s a long old time until the meal.

I’ve been to weddings like this and if you’re not careful you can be half cut by the time you sit down to eat as there’s always drinking, fizz and the like after the ceremony so it’s a good idea to have a quick lunch before the ceremony. I agree it would be rude to miss the wedding itself. Personally I find they drag on far too long these days and I’m pleased to be not going to anymore in the foreseeable.

I think it’s more appropriate to go for the ceremony and meal and then leave when you need to - skipping the ceremony is weird for me

There must be somewhere to sit quietly while most of the photos are being taken.

The ceremony and the wedding breakfast

That's what I'd do too.
Don't miss the important part, the ceremony.

Mind you, once you're there you might decide you can stay the course.

I am afraid I think its rude to miss the ceremony. I was at a wedding in the summer a number of people (mostly over 70) left as the disco got under way, no one thought it was rude.

Go and stay as long as you can they’ll be made up that you attended.

Surely, the important thing is the actual ceremony. You shouldn't miss that at any price.

Enjoy the ceremony and wedding breakfast I am sure your family will completely understand you not wanting to stay all evening.

I'm afraid I do think it would be rude and agree with all those who say go to the ceremony, the reception and skip the "evening do " having made your excuses. Unless of course you feel like partying into the wee small hours !
(I actually dislike the modern convention of separate invitations to the evening do - a bit like being in the Reserves.)

What is the important part after all?

I think that the ceremony and photos afterwards is a great way to meet with relatives, so I would go to the ceremony then the Breakfast then wave goodbye before their friends arrive for the Disco.
You might want to tuck a biscuit or 3 into your bag to keep you going between the ceremony and the breakfast, that’s a long time to go without lunch.

What ‘most’ of the above have said. You have been invited to celebrate their marriage by witnessing it and then being fed, not to attend just the after party.

As others have said, I would go to the ceremony & breakfast. Seeing them married and celebrating the marriage is the most important part. It may turn out that you are able to enjoy the whole day once you’re there.

Riverwalk

Yes, rude not to go to the ceremony and just turn up for the breakfast and evening do! I don't imagine they expect you to stay until midnight.

What happens after the 1pm ceremony and wedding breakfast at 4pm?

Most provide a drink and canapés. Usually whilst all the photos are being taken

Oh definitely don't miss the ceremony. That would be rude and rather
sad.
As someone else has suggested: Leave when you run out of steam.
Leave the young ones to their disco.

Mind you at DD's wedding my DSis who was nearly 70 was dancing until after midnight but it was at a hotel and we had rooms to go to.

I would also choose the marriage itself (ceremony) and then the breakfast where there will be the opportunity to chat to family and other guests in-between (and after if I still had energy).

The disco is an add-on (irrelevant really I think).

Doing it this way allows you to get away late afternoon/early evening.

Is it rude to go to the wedding breakfast and stay for the evening which ends at 12 midnight? Thereby missing the ceremony and the photos. Its rural and no accomodation nearby when we can have a rest without taxi there and back due to drinking and driving.

Not rude. If you prefer breakfast and disco, do those bits. Have fun!

Unlike most of us, the OP sounds as though she would rather go to just the evening disco!

Each to her own, but not my idea of fun. To me, the ceremony plus the breakfast are the main event and what it’s all about.

This reminds me of my neighbour, who doesn’t attend any funeral service, but goes to all the wakes, usually held in our local pub 😂

Ceremony is a must as is the “breakfast” but disco could easily be missed.

If it were me, I’d go for the wedding and leave after the ‘breakfast’. I can’t stand wedding discos - or at least all the ones I’ve experienced have been deafeningly loud, with nowhere to escape to.

Not long ago, 6 of us (all related late 60s/over 70s) attended the church bit and the afternoon tea (it was the wedding of a cousin’s son) but left before the late dinner and disco. We went off for a nice quiet dinner together, close to our hotel.

Of course we informed the couple in advance, so they wouldn’t be paying for wasted meals, and I’m quite sure they weren’t in the least put out by half a dozen oldies buggering off early - there were plenty of their young friends for the later revels.

Might add that we had a very nice and unusually prompt written thank-you for the cash I’d put in the card!

Yes, rude not to go to the ceremony and just turn up for the breakfast and evening do! I don't imagine they expect you to stay until midnight.

What happens after the 1pm ceremony and wedding breakfast at 4pm?

wonder why the meal is so late? won't you have to leave after the ceremony to find lunch?
go home after the food and toasts and speeches, who wants to be in a hellishly loud disco until midnight, only teenagers.
me and DP went to a similar wedding and the music was ear splitting and you couldn't talk or hear others either.