Only Grandson

No, I am blessed with 3 grand children but there was a big gap between the 1st and the second, and the second and the third.

A very interesting question. We have ten grandchildren so just give at birthdays and Christmas in the main. we might buy them treats on days out, but only small things e.g. a comic.
We only had a few months of only having one grandchild so I can't really say if it would have been different, but I suspect we might have started a savings account for them, not possible for ten!

I keep to Christmas and birthdays usually, but if they visit ( which is not very often because they live at the other end of the country) I always give them some money, cash in hand, about £20 each.

I have two, by the way, a boy 14 and a girl 11.

Sorry I should have said I buy for them Christmas and birthdays.

We only have 2 Grandchildren, we always gave them £20 each when they visited as well as Birthday and Christmas gifts and money.
As they are now both at University we won’t see them so often, we are also funding their day to day living costs so we won’t give them money when they visit and we are spending less on their Birthday and Christmas gifts.
Having said that we take them food and odds and ends when we visit them, writing it all down it does seem to add up to an an awful amount! Still, they never ask……..

Five GC - the oldest has her own home, partner, child and dog. I don't give any of them random amounts of cash, just Christmas and birthdays. I'm proud of the way they have all (except the youngest) been able to find part-time work, combining it with school work and other pursuits. They have never asked for subsidies and I have never felt the need to offer.

I think a lot depends on how well off you are. Nothing wrong with birthdays and Christmas and the occasional treat if that’s all you can afford.
We have always spent on our three. Trips out, money for holiday ice creams, Easter gifts pocket money. driving lessons when 17.
Still think love and caring are the best gifts grandparents can give including their time and attention.

I have 2 grandsons, 6 and 2. I put money in accounts for them every month, give them birthday and Christmas presents as ‘instructed’ by their parents, (so I don’t buy something that won’t be played with or worn).
When I’m out and about, I don’t deliberately look for things for them, but if something catches my eye, I’d probably buy it - eg. a £5 dinosaur onesie in M&S on Friday for the little one,
I see both regularly, so don’t take something every time, but occasionally I might give a book, a little jigsaw or a set of Pokémon cards.

I agree Doodle - the most important gift I can give is my time.

I have 7 I give the a good money gift Christmas and birthdays and would spend money on them if they visit (all grown up earn a lot more than me but they re still my grandkids)

I thinking showering children with money and treats is not a good child rearing strategy, whether it is the parents or grandparents.

In the case of a grandparent doing it it smacks of them trying to buy their grandchild's love and affection, because they are afraid of not being loved by them, and that it a disaster.

We live about 200 miles from DGC and see them about 6 times a year. We buy presnts for birthdays and Christmas, aways againt a wish list provided by child or parent and, like OOpsadaisy1, we usually slide a paper banknote into their hands as we lieve to go home , or they do.

In between, the odd small item, a book, or icecream or the like.

But as in everything it is the parents that call the shots.

We have two, 10 and 16, we buy for birthday and Christmas and both have a small amount paid into their bank accounts monthly, a little spending money for family holidays.
Different ‘treats’ eg, MrJ is taking the 10 year old to a premier league football game next weekend, we’ve bought a hair dryer and straighteners kept here for when the 16 year old stays

I only have one and I pay a monthly amount into an investment account for him, which we have done since he was three. He’s now nearly seventeen. I mark any achievements such as good exam results with cash, and if he helps me out with any heavy gardening, I give him what I would pay the gardener. I don’t look on it as “buying his affection” and I know he would be horrified to think that I needed to. He gives that freely and often. He’s still at school and has a casual part time job but a little extra doesn’t come amiss.

We’ve 5 grandsons, primary and pre-school age. We pay for a comic subscription for each household, and have 5 money boxes here that we put any shiny pound coins in through the year for their summer holiday spends - it amounts to under £20 each, but they enjoy opening their box and counting it. We don’t routinely give presents apart from at Christmas and on birthdays, as they all have more than enough. The exception is books, which we usually get from the charity shops anyway. We’ll treat them to activities though when we’re looking after them.

If we just had the one? I think the only difference is that we’d have opened him a regular savings account with the money we’d have saved.

We have 3 Grandsons.
The youngest two get a gift at Christmas and Birthdays plus some money into savings accounts .
accounts. We don’t buy them a gift every time we see them but we love taking them out to different places and we will pay entrance and probably a meal. But no ‘Tat’ from gift shops.
The eldest Grandson is 21 and working. He had a part time job while at college .
He lives at home , pays rent and never asks for anything.
Nowadays he gets a cash gift for Christmas and Birthday and sometimes we slip him a little extra. He works for a Charity in a job he loves .
He’s a lovely young man who is quite happy to spend time with us .

We enjoy treating them all sometimes.

Greyduster what you are doing wasn't what I had in mind when I spoke of 'buying affection'

What I had in mind was those grandmothers who are always going over the top, always buying expensive toys, sweets and so on, buying every item on a christmas list etc etc.

I buy gifts for my DGC, but not constantly and not expensive items..

Our older GC (11 and 13) come to stay for a week most school holidays. We treat them to activities and to days out when they are staying with us, and we all enjoy theatre trips etc. Presents are for birthdays and Christmas.

If they are here for a week I set aside an amount of money for snacks/drinks etc that they ask for over and above what we provide anyway. For example we buy popcorn if we go to the cinema but they might ask for a drink too. If that money isn't spent then they are given the remainder as cash-in-hand when they go home. There are rarely any requests these days - they'd much rather have the cash!

We buy for our DGC whether they pass exams or not. Some children are better at schoolwork than others. How awful to give money to the clever one and not to the one who works just as hard but doesn’t succeed.

DH always talks about his friend and his twin sister. His friend passed his exams and got a bike. His sister didn’t and got nothing. We both think that’s an appalling way to treat children. I would hate to be like that. We have always treated our sons, their wives and our DGC equally. With all our love.

We don’t have a list of what we can or cannot buy for our grandchildren as their parents know we buy out of love and caring. All gifts are gratefully received.
I have never considered it buying affection. I am well aware from their reaction that our grandchildren love us because of who we are not what we give them.. Hours spent playing games with them when young. Doing daft craft things. Being there for them and being part of their family. That’s what counts. It’s not money that makes the bond but caring.

I have three grandsons between 17 and 10. They get Christmas and birthday presents and, occasionally, I might buy one of them something I've seen and think they will like. It will only be something small.

Shouldn't matter if you have 1 or 10 grandchild .
I only have 1 grandchild , his parents are very adamant that he dosent need excess material possessions. I tend to make things for him rather than buy things , he's only a year old i tend to draw him pictures etc . That way he knows I'm thinking of him without going over the top .

Give my GC a monthly allowance via their GoHenry accounts. Must ask them if they think I'm trying to buy their love......

I wish people wouldstop misinterpreting what I said. When I talked of buying love I was referring to OTT grandparents constantly showering their grand chlldren with expensive toys and treats. Not the usual present giving and treating that most grandparents, including me, do.

I had a friend whose mother was like that. It meant, as she didn't drive, that the daughter and family moved somewhere inaccessible, a good walk from the local bus stop to try to limit the amount of mostly unwanted and unplayed toys she brought with her when visiting and they tried to visit her at very short notice, so she had limited time to shop before seeing them.

I have 6 GC….2 older (21 and 20) and 4 little ones. The older 2 get monthly PM from me via S/O. The younger ones always get a small toy or chocolates , whenever I see them, about once a fortnight. I hate going empty-handed.