Partner refuses to speak to my 8 year old grandson

Curtain twitcher, not a nice post.

I cannot understand how anyone would put up with being told what to do or not do, however lonely I was. Wouldn't want him.

Leave him, he sounds a spoilt, controlling man child
No one would get a look in if they were that childish and nasty about any of my family and after a year !!!
Nasty post curtaintwitcher she’s not asking him to take on the rest of the family just to be kind and leave her to her few chats or brief meet-ups
Incompatible with you, and your needs, jump ship asap

Curtaintwitcher

There is this assumption that a new partner must also take on the rest of the family. I don't agree. We all have different standards and your new partner seems to have higher standards than you. Find someone who is as lax on manners as you are.

This man formed his opinion on his first meeting a year ago with a then 7 year old child. Since then he has chosen to ignore him, refuses to have a relationship with him and makes derogatory remarks about him to his grandmother. I can’t see in any way how he has higher standards than the OP. Quite the opposite . His behaviour is nothing short of bullying and controlling.

Is this another made up story? Why on earth would anyone want to be with an overbearing oaf of a man like this? Does he have any redeeming qualities?

If a child interupts once it doesn't mean they are lacking in manners! Children deserve second and third chances ,acceptance,love and forgiveness. It sounds as if OH is very unforgiving. If he loved you he wouldn't behave like this. He sounds a very rigid thinker lacking compromise and flexibility

I have a totally different opinion from everyone else here. It sounds as though your grandson is spoiled, hasn't been taught any manners or respect. It is not ok to interrupt someone while they are talking on the phone, unless there is an emergency.

There is this assumption that a new partner must also take on the rest of the family. I don't agree. We all have different standards and your new partner seems to have higher standards than you. Find someone who is as lax on manners as you are.

As they say on Mumsnet- LTB.
You have only been with him for a year and this will just be the start of the misery to come.

This makes me so cross. He's a controller. How dare he dictate to you about your grandson?!! He's trying to isolate you. You ask for advice: work hard at standing up to him and if that fails leave.

Horrible man who want a carer all to himself. He is a narcissist, get rid of him and keep your family close

He’s 78 and insists that when he was a child he never interrupted

Sadly he’s a selfish man child. Do you really want to live out your days with this nasty, controlling man? He has no relationship with his own grandchildren and he’s now set on alienating you from yours.

He’s not likely to stop till he’s the only person in your life and all your focus is on him and his selfish ways. Sadly, it sounds like he’s already succeeding and from experience this situation will continue to worsen unless you find the courage to stand up to him. I hope you do.
🚩🚩🚩

Red flags flying.

He’s trying to separate you from your family so that he has you to himself.

How sweet………………

Why are you with a sanctimonious, self centred, grumpy nasty old man?

Can’t you just see your lovely typical 8 year grandson asking in future years why didn’t my grandad like me? What did I do wrong?

Mind you I don’t think you stand a chance of getting a good relationship between your obnoxious and stubborn partner and anyone else if he doesn’t even like his own granddaughters.

That a man can think so little of and behave so badly towards children and obviously his adult daughter is appalling.

Why are you even with him? He’s obviously splitting you away from your family as much as he can.

Did you move abroad to be with him or did you live there already? I’d be careful you are not being isolated from support and help.

While your grandson, who you don't see very often, is having a sleepover I can't see any need for your husband, who you live with, to interrupt by phoning you unless he wishes to speak to the boy.
Which he clearly doesn't, so why do it...? 🤔

Advice please : don't answer the phone.

OldFrill

I wouldn't be ringing the self-centred git sorry husband, when grandson was there. I'd make sure the self-centred git sorry husband knows exactly where unreasonable behaviour and demands get him - silenced.

Totally agree, apart from the silenced bit, I’d be condsidering a divorce..

You’ve given up so much for him. I hope you have a robust will in place and not favouring him.

OldFrill

I wouldn't be ringing the self-centred git sorry husband, when grandson was there. I'd make sure the self-centred git sorry husband knows exactly where unreasonable behaviour and demands get him - silenced.

I concur. I would also be deciding if this is the sort of man I want to spend my years with, and lose time with my family. I’m sorry you’re dealing with a stubborn petulant child while
Trying to have a relationship with your grandson.

I wouldn't be ringing the self-centred git sorry husband, when grandson was there. I'd make sure the self-centred git sorry husband knows exactly where unreasonable behaviour and demands get him - silenced.