Would you tell a man he's got a urine stain on his trousers?

I agree with others, could you kindly suggest they’ve spilt something?

Yes, I’d go with the “oh I think you’ve split something on your trousers, wasn’t sure if you’ve noted?”

Or “poo, you smell, is that wee-wee?”

It’s medically recognised in older men and can be helped with medication if the prostate is ok. If you feel uncomfortable speaking with this person about it is there someone closer to him that you know well? If so you could mention it from a place of concern in case a prostate issue. The sooner they are diagnosed the safer for the individual. Having said all that I’d also be wary of mentioning to him it if not a close family friend or relation.

In Germany men sit down on the toilet. So I am told by German friends.
Why don’t men use a square of loo roll to dry themselves off as we do.

There have been a few threads recently about urine seemingly leaking, both in men and women. As I suggested in another thread, and as silverlining48 comments above, why is it only women who wipe?

Buy him some dark trousers maybe?
Far less noticeable. Hopefully someone can tactfully explain why .

RosiesMaw2

Get your husband to have the conversation.

Good one! I'll try, but not sure if he will agree. Man to man would be better.

My husband had the finger up the bum prostate test, so I didn't know that. Things have moved on! Much more dignified for men. (Never mind all the things we women have to endure!!)

Exactly! And why is it only women who think to use pads? Even if they don't want to buy pads all the time, they could use a folded flannel or something and just wash it?

Anything would be better than walking around with stains in a certain area.

RosiesMaw2

It’s PROSTATE!

Mind you, he may be prostrate afterwards. 😂

DH sits down AND wipes!

What did you have to do to get him to sit down and wipe ?@DamaskRose

I wouldn't mind a bit of blotting.

It would make life a lot better if men sat down to pee. No more spraying and dripping all over the toilet and surroundings then leaving it for others to clean up.

What would I do? I'd definitely tell them.
I can't think of a single person - man in this case - who wouldn't be horrified to know that he was walking around in urine-stained trousers. I'd imagine that he has no idea that his trousers are being targeted in this way - he'd probably avoid light coloured trousers if he did!

Telling him would only be doing him a favour IMHO. It's likely that he has reached a stage/age of bladder problems when he can't reliably empty his bladder without leaking afterwards. Wiping and sitting down possibly won't solve the problem. Either he needs to have a prostate chat with his GP, maybe have a PSA test (which could actually save his life) (and yes, I know they can be unreliable but at least then a rectal exam and/or further tests could be organised, if it was deemed advisable) Meanwhile, he needs to pick up a pack of Tena for Men in the appropriate size pads and ensure that he always wears one in his pants to avoid further drama and extra laundry!

Yes, some men can be very difficult on medical issues but with the focus very much on Prostate cancer in recent months, he must surely be aware of some of the detail and sensible enough to admit that this is an important aspect of his health which needs attention. He ought to be grateful that you're trying to save him from any risk of future embarrassment.

And if he's not? Well, you'll have done your best. 🤞

silverlining48

In Germany men sit down on the toilet. So I am told by German friends.
Why don’t men use a square of loo roll to dry themselves off as we do.

I've been told the same - and it's now the country where men are most likely to sit down. But they always had a word deriding such a practice - "sitzpinkler". Just saying it makes me smile.

Men have the problem because they are carrying hose pipes around, there is always some water left in them when you put them away.
I would never suggest to a man that there is a prostate problem, usually that is a night time issue.
DH died of prostate cancer and kept his dignity until the very end.
Rosiesmaw when I received the death certificate the registrar had written the cause of death as PROSTRATE cancer, I was almost apoplectic.

Sitzpinkler 😅

I know it’s a serious subject (been there) but thank you for the
word of the week, Grandmafrench. Just love it.

Grandmafrench 🤣🤣🤣

harrigran

Men have the problem because they are carrying hose pipes around, there is always some water left in them when you put them away.
I would never suggest to a man that there is a prostate problem, usually that is a night time issue.
DH died of prostate cancer and kept his dignity until the very end.
Rosiesmaw when I received the death certificate the registrar had written the cause of death as PROSTRATE cancer, I was almost apoplectic.

So sorry for you loss. X

ExDancer

The up to date prostrate test does not start with the 'finger up the bum' examination, its just a blood test. No doubt things will get embarrassing later on if the blood test is positive.
Remember the slogan 'don't die of embarrassment'? (I think directed at colon cancer).
Is this gentleman married? does he have a sister?

The test procedure does start like that to see if the prostate is enlarged.

A blood test is to find out if PSA levels are raised which could indicate cancer.

The prostate gland is very often enlarged in older men and an indication of this is problems with urinating; this does not necessarily mean the prostate is cancerous.

OnwardandUpward

RosiesMaw2

Get your husband to have the conversation.

Good one! I'll try, but not sure if he will agree. Man to man would be better.

My husband had the finger up the bum prostate test, so I didn't know that. Things have moved on! Much more dignified for men. (Never mind all the things we women have to endure!!)

Yes, it's still the procedure, OnwardandUpward.
I can verify that as I was in the consulting room at the time!

lots of people have continence problems and you can buy pads for this kind of thing.

harrigran

Rosiesmaw when I received the death certificate the registrar had written the cause of death as PROSTRATE cancer, I was almost apoplectic

Oh Harrigran I feel for you. That must have been the ultimate insult and in other less tragic circumstances might have raised a laugh. Did you get it changed or would that have delayed probate?