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Are we looking younger than our mothers/grandmothers did at the same age?

(133 Posts)
Sago Tue 20-Aug-24 09:55:58

I am 61, I don’t feel I look particularly young or old for my age, yet when I think back to my mother at 60 she looked very old in comparison.

The internet has been wonderful to keep up with trends and styles and skincare and cosmetics are far more sophisticated.

So are we looking/dressing younger or am delusional?

Musicgirl Thu 22-Aug-24 08:16:38

Not everyone was slimmer in earlier decades - many people were overweight. Both my grandfathers were as round as they were tall. I agree that far more people are overweight/obese to an extent that was unusual years ago and that a good number of them wear clothes that are totally unsuitable for their size, thus accentuating the problem.

David49 Thu 22-Aug-24 07:58:41

Everyone was slimmer in previous decades there was far more physical work and food was far more expensive in relation to wages. When my parents married there was still food rationing as well, somewhere Ive still got my ration card from back then.

Summerfly Thu 22-Aug-24 00:35:05

Don’t forget the pearls Kitty. 😁

Casdon Wed 21-Aug-24 20:36:40

Lilyflower

Some women in previous decades were slimmer but had poorly cut hair which is very ageing. Today, a number of women are slimmer because of an interest in exercise and health and they eat well -though others are not and do not. And modern women also have access to haircare and beauty products that their own mothers did not.

I walked along Lyme Regis seafront today and noted that leisure clothes, especially fleeces and sweatshirts, do not a youthful appearance make.

Or even worse, jogging bottoms, the most unflattering clothing item in our history I think. If you look back at old footage from seventy years ago, everybody looked smart when they were out and about compared to now, when seeing smartly dressed people is more remarkable.

cookiemonster66 Wed 21-Aug-24 20:12:53

I remember my nan in her kitchen with a pinny on, and nora batty thick tights, she had a purple rinse on her grey hair which was set at the hairdressers every Friday in rollers. When I worked out her age she was only in her 40's! I think times have changed and we can stay younger looking nowadays

Lilyflower Wed 21-Aug-24 20:10:24

Some women in previous decades were slimmer but had poorly cut hair which is very ageing. Today, a number of women are slimmer because of an interest in exercise and health and they eat well -though others are not and do not. And modern women also have access to haircare and beauty products that their own mothers did not.

I walked along Lyme Regis seafront today and noted that leisure clothes, especially fleeces and sweatshirts, do not a youthful appearance make.

anniehall123 Wed 21-Aug-24 20:03:44

I agree that we do look, feel and act younger than our grandmothers or even mothers. I also think it does have to do with better nutrition, skin and hair products are easier to use and get. Also, it is true that we have so many more conveniences to help us with the chores that our mothers and grandmothers spent hours doing. I also think the philosophies have changed, in my mom's day if you were married, everything was about the husbands' well being, as he was the breadwinner. In those days by the time you finished your housework, ran the kids everywhere, it was time to make dinner every night. That is still true today, but now woman our age are encouraged to take care of ourselves and that it is okay to take time for ourselves. We also have much better health care to help with our hormones after Menopause and solutions for staying as young as you can.

JasmineH Wed 21-Aug-24 19:45:35

I am so touched and teary eyed.

Musicgirl Wed 21-Aug-24 19:34:58

I have a photo l treasure. It is of my parents at their wedding in 1963 and has both sets of my grandparents on it. I am now older than all four of them were then, but I am sure I look younger. My two grandmothers and 46 and 54 respectively at the time and both are dressed very smartly in the style of the late Queen Mother. Both had permed hair, which was kept in shape by means of a weekly shampoo and set. I think people had an elderly mindset back then, which was nothing to do with a harder life. They made themselves old by their attitude towards what was deemed “suitable” for people of their age, especially when it came to clothing. The lack of natural teeth did not help, either. They were elderly at fifty and old by sixty. My mother, now in her early eighties, has always dressed in a classic style but still has most of her natural hair colour, which I have inherited. Certainly, when I see photos of my mother from twenty-odd years ago, or look in the mirror, I see her looking back at me.

M0nica Wed 21-Aug-24 16:27:32

It depends on your grey hair, my white round the edges and still dark brown in the centre is not a good look, which is why I colour my hair.

grandtanteJE65 I din't do uncomfortable clothes, even as a teeneager. I had 2 pairs of dtilettos, rapidly discovered how uncomfortable they were - stopped wearing them.

I wore a roll on when I wore stockings but ditched them all when tights came in. They were never so tight they marked my skin, as I said, comfort has always come first.

Neither of my grandmothers, who died 1958, 1970 wore stays. My maternal grandmother dressed well on a very tight budget, but as a professional dressmaker, could make beautiful clothes for herself, My mother, as I have said, also dressed very well.

I think the fact is at a nytime the range of clothes worn by women of all ages has always been very varied. Some wore corsets and stays, some didn't, some dressed well, some didn't, some cared how they looked, some didn't.

Dianehillbilly1957 Wed 21-Aug-24 16:25:41

I'm 67, been told I don't look it and I certainly don't act it!! I'm a tee shirt and jeans girl, but my late mother was was 89 when she passed away, very stylish and didn't look her age at all, lovely young skin and always smart, makeup in place before she ever left the house. Never bothered colouring her hair but it was cut regularly and always in place. I remember my grandmother who passed away at 64 and to me her and various people and family looked much older and dressed so much older.

semperfidelis Wed 21-Aug-24 16:06:08

Grey hair is the height of fashion these days! I add a wash in wash out blue tint which I'm told looks good. A neighbour adds a streak of pink to her hair.

My Mother also had a blue rinse. There was a product used for keeping laundry white - which added the stylish tint to hair.

I suspect that their skins were more wrinkled because they didn't know much about sun screen products.

grandtanteJE65 Wed 21-Aug-24 15:10:36

M0nica

Babs03 I used to care what I looked like, wearing high heels that wrecked my feet and pencil skirts that I couldn’t walk in but I just go for comfort and colour now I am older.

I do not think that caring how you looked ever meant wearing uncomfortable clothes. When I was working, a rare woman at management level in engineering firms I always dressed well, and it was commented on, but high heels, straight skirts never formed any part of my wardrobe. Jaeger suits and fashionable shoes, with tiny heels, usually Russell & Bromley, were my style and a good line in surprised hauteur should anyone ask me whether I could take shorthand or do some copying

This is doubtless true of many of our generation, Monica, but certainly did not apply either to my mother as a young woman or to my grandmothers.

My paternal grandmother, who died in 1966 when I was coming up for 15, wore long salmon pink boned corsets every day of her life, until her final illness kept her in bed. Her stay lace was about two yards long- I very much doubt the garment was comfortable, but she felt indecent without it.

I clearly remember my mother's difficulty in finding roll-ons or even bras that were particularly comfortable, and I have a very clear memory of my 14 year old selv rebelling against a roll-on that left marks of its elastication all the way from my hips to my pubic bone, as well as the marks caused by the attached suspenders.

A couple of years later, I forced my feet into pointed shoes that squashed my big and my little toes, but the were fashionable, so I put up with the discomfort.

I am sure I am not alone in this teenage behaviour.

Colette describes an actress of her acquaintance whose corset was so long and stiffly boned that it prevented her from sitting down. She only accepted parts that did not require her to sit on stage, and remained on her feet from early morning until late night! This would be in the 1890s or early 1900s.

Bellanonna Wed 21-Aug-24 13:55:28

I think, too, that we older people (I’m nearly 84) have a wider variety of clothes available to us. I shop at White Stuff, which stocks clothes that would suit all but the really young. I remember shops that catered for older people with pleated, checked skirts and twin sets, etc. i don’t think there are any shops like that now, nor areas like that in department stores. As for shoes, I wear (I think they’re called ballet pumps)
or trainers, as do many much younger people. I’ve abandoned high heels, though, for safety and comfort reasons.
I used to think of people of my age as frumpy but everyone I know who is in her eighties now certainly doesn’t wear clothes that would identify her as old.

David49 Wed 21-Aug-24 13:55:11

Both of my grandmothers looked very old and died around 65 yrs old, that was mid to late 1950s they had obviously had very hard lives both having 6 children too.

Today if a woman looks after herself and dresses well it takes 10 yrs off her easily

MissAdventure Wed 21-Aug-24 13:52:28

Yes, it's only that my other neighbour commented n it, that it occurred to me how rude it is. smile

All those comments, for all those years, wasted, because I never really took any notice.

Granmarderby10 Wed 21-Aug-24 13:48:08

MissAdventure

It's really unpleasant.
My neighbour has said it to my face a couple of times, too!!!

Just WOW!…they actually said that to you?

there are some sad excuses for humans about.

MissAdventure Wed 21-Aug-24 13:43:39

My nan always said if she found a wrinkle she ate more to fill it out.

win Wed 21-Aug-24 13:43:12

I think a lot of the fact we look younger is our self worth, self assuredness and generally most of us have been working most of our lives. Some have more street cred and knowledge than any of my grandparents and even mother had. My mother was just like I am though. She never started to age until well in to her 80s but then due to an accident got very stooped very quickly. I am similar but that is due to a severe scoliosis. She always cared how she looked and wore makeup and nice clothes right to the very end as I probably will too.

Aveline Wed 21-Aug-24 13:40:40

A dear friend at work always said that he had no problem with 'mutton dressed as lamb' but he drew the line at 'carrion dressed as mutton'!

Buttonjugs Wed 21-Aug-24 13:40:18

Shinamae

We have the benefit of make up and good skin care which our grandmother certainly did not have( or hair dye)
Also, they did not have the benefit of washing machines and hoovers, and other labour saving devices
I think our grandmother‘s worked so hard the last thing they thought about was how they looked..

My grandmother (Nan) died her hair before it turned grey. There was one occasion when I noticed she had grey hair coming through at the roots and I got told off for pointing it out! She always wanted to look her best, she would ‘starve herself down’ if she thought she had put on weight, she dressed really nicely and looking back she looked younger than her contemporaries. I don’t know if she always had a washing machine but after they moved back to the city when she would have been about 56-7 she had one then. Her daughter, my mother always looked glam too apart from during her third marriage to a coercive husband who deliberately made her look drab, probably because he knew he was punching above. Both of them were slim and I am not so I can’t honestly say I think I look younger than they did at my age. What I have noticed is that my granddaughter wears similar clothes to me! She only likes wearing leggings with long tops. She’s all about the comfort but she’s co-ordinated and obsessed with hair and makeup (she’s 12).

Gummie Wed 21-Aug-24 13:28:06

My mother died when she was 71. She always looked young and glamorous. She kept out of the sun, didn't drink or smoke and took care of her appearance.

My siblings and I have all been hit with the looking younger stick. It's in the genes. I'm 64 and always alarmed by old so many people who are much younger that me look.

MissAdventure Wed 21-Aug-24 13:23:44

It's really unpleasant.
My neighbour has said it to my face a couple of times, too!!!

Lahlah65 Wed 21-Aug-24 13:22:10

petra

My mother was very stylish. She was the first person to colour my hair and pluck my monobrow ( Frida Kahlow had nothing on me) 😂
Back in time when smoking was the norm she smoked Sobranei cocktail cigarettes when her and my father went out at the weekend. The colours fascinated me.

Yes - buying a pack of fancy cigarettes was a party treat. I didn’t smoke regularly but loved buying these, in their pretty box!

Chocolatelovinggran Wed 21-Aug-24 13:20:31

Yes MissAdventure- anyone who referred to anyone in those terms around me would receive a swift response " who wants to be mutton dressed as mutton?"