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Long distant grandparent

(45 Posts)
InTheCove Sun 04-May-25 13:49:44

I am a Pen Pal with my grandkids who live in another city. I always include a small treat with my letters. They love receiving my letters and trying to guess what I have sent them. Costs more in postage, but worth it.

SaxonGrace Sun 04-May-25 13:47:44

I sympathise, three of my grandchildren are in New York, I’m in the UK, when I worked I went to visit every year, they used to come here too, now I’m retired air fares are almost out of reach, they did come over last year but five air fares plus car hire for a fortnight isn’t cheap so I don’t expect them to be able to come very often now, we face time a few times a year, but ones on college the two others are teens with very busy lives, it’s difficult but we do what we can, I am lucky to have other grandchildren in the UK too. I tell myself that were it many years ago we would have been lucky to see them once in a lifetime, at least modern communication helps.

Hithere Fri 02-May-25 13:45:55

If the relationship with your son is distant, you need to work on it first.

That's your answer

Cambsnan Fri 02-May-25 06:20:25

Don’t give up on the screen options. During coved we would set put screen in the room so it felt like we were together. It does not need to be intense conversation. Just set it up so each end carries on with what they were doing but can chat. Preparing dinner worked for us. While my daughter cooked we chatted and the children came in and out of the room. You soon get in a routine with it. I could even help with homework long distance.

Water69 Fri 02-May-25 03:43:20

My son seems distant. They only call when they want something. Wish I had had a girl too.

Water69 Fri 02-May-25 02:16:14

Thanks for all your help.

Water69 Fri 02-May-25 02:02:05

I thought it was good but my daughter in law is very close to her family. They are her priority

Water69 Fri 02-May-25 01:59:52

Thank-you.

Water69 Fri 02-May-25 01:58:30

I thought it was good but now I am not sure. They don’s seem to think it is important for the grands to see me.

NotSpaghetti Fri 02-May-25 00:37:58

And another
www.gransnet.com/forums/grandparenting/1330914-Support-for-grandparents-who-have-children-and-grandchildren-living-abroad?pg=1

There are more if you look them up.

NotSpaghetti Fri 02-May-25 00:36:49

Here's another
www.gransnet.com/forums/grandparenting/1315739-first-grandson-lives-abroad

NotSpaghetti Fri 02-May-25 00:35:58

Here's a link to an old post which may be useful.
www.gransnet.com/forums/grandparenting/1285129-grandchildren-overseas

Hithere Thu 01-May-25 22:36:07

How is the relationship with the parents of the grandkids?
With your son or daughter?

They are the key

Water69 Thu 01-May-25 22:08:13

Yes, grands are small, 5 and 9. I might try sending more cards and letters. Hopefully the parents can read them. Thanks for all the great ideas!

Floradora9 Thu 01-May-25 21:13:00

I used to send little parcels for my GC which caused great excitement . They did not have to cost a lot but just little things I saw that I knew they would like . I remember a friend whose mother sent a comic every week to her grandson . His parents could have just gone to the shops to buy it but she liked to be the one who provided it .

NotSpaghetti Thu 01-May-25 20:46:16

How old are the children Water69?

There are other threads on this or a very similar subject which may be worth reading too. Quite a few of us with families abroad for example.

lafergar Thu 01-May-25 20:46:03

I know it's horribly old fashioned but why not send them a gift? preferably something daft.

Chocolatelovinggran Thu 01-May-25 20:42:21

I agree with NotSpaghetti about small items in the post. I include a little card saying why I chose them. I hope that this means that they know that I'm thinking about them
WhatsApp is good, and we use it a lot, but if the children are small, it will require parental help.

NotSpaghetti Thu 01-May-25 18:29:46

I like WhatsApp because you can send a message and they can pick it up when available.
My older 2 grandchildren now send me things themselves - text or video messages, links to things they've read, photos of things they think I'm interested in and so on.

You can use it like FaceTime if you want to but we don't usually.
Occasionally someone video calls me from the other side of the world (usually when I'm just waking or going to bed!).

If they are young they may like little things in the post. Our daughter used to when we were living in America and the grandparents were in the UK.

Drawings of Grandpa doing something silly arrived from my mum quite often! And photo's of next door's dog in the woods and stickers/comics... she was very young and this was really exciting.

flowers

Water69 Thu 01-May-25 18:14:25

My son and family live on the west coast. I am in the Midwest. They came to visit 1 time in the last 4 years. FaceTime is not an option as they say too busy. Traveling to see them is expensive and challenging for me as I use a walker and getting older. Trying to make peace with not seeing my grandkids. Any ideas would be appreciated. Than-you!