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A Tie Or Not?

(51 Posts)
Calendargirl Sat 26-Jul-25 17:45:06

Have been invited to a wedding anniversary celebration mid August. A Sunday Lunch for about 60 people, in a local smartish hotel.

I checked with the hostess about the dress code for the men. She said there was no dress code, as such, some might wear a suit, some a jacket and trousers, but really, whatever DH felt comfortable in, especially if it’s a hot day.

So he intends to wear a pair of light coloured M&S trousers, with a cotton/linen short sleeved shirt from Next. He thought a tie was needed, but he doesn’t have a suitable one and rarely wears ties, only a black one for funerals.

I said he would soon be taking it off anyway, and don’t think it’s required.

But am I right? Do you think he should be wearing a tie, and does the outfit sound too casual, although he looks very nice in it?

He’s been guided by me, and I hope I haven’t got it wrong,

(No idea what others will be wearing).

Allira Sun 27-Jul-25 10:46:22

Calendargirl
A smart short-sleeved shirt without a jacket (and no tie) would be fine, even if it's cool it is an indoor event.

Yes, I'm the one who'd be in a spin about what I should wear! Having been to so many formal events years ago, we tend not to now and life is more casual.

GrannyIvy Sun 27-Jul-25 10:54:18

My DH has a blazer and linen jacket for this sort of thing but I think no tie necessary especially with SS shirt. I think his outfit sounds fine and if he has no jacket wouldn’t bother going to buy one as he will take it off when he is there anyway. Enjoy

NotSpaghetti Sun 27-Jul-25 11:50:37

people would rather have his presence than worry about what he is wearing

So true.
I would stop worrying.
I'm sure he'll be fine.

Shelflife Sun 27-Jul-25 16:23:59

Men don't wear ties very often . I keep trying to tell my DH this but he is a traditionalist!! We go out and he is often the only man wearing a tie. From what you ' say ' your invitation does not warrant yout DH wearing a tie ( unless of course he refers to ) . Enjoy the occasion.

shysal Sun 27-Jul-25 17:57:42

His smart casual outfit without tie sounds perfect to me. Enjoy the event.

welbeck Sun 27-Jul-25 23:52:16

Most men I know would wear chinos or similar and a polo shirt.

Aldom Mon 28-Jul-25 06:17:13

Calendar Girl. Why not have a hunt in charity shops for a linen jacket for your husband? My late husband always wore a linen jacket in summer and after he died his jackets were donated to a charity shop.

Calendargirl Mon 28-Jul-25 06:28:42

Good idea Aldom. Will check them out.

Frenchgalinspain Mon 28-Jul-25 13:41:59

eazybee

I would think a light linen jacket might be appropriate as summer weather is unpredictable and you might gather outside. Definitely no tie with a short-sleeved shirt.

My husband and I agree that it is a not a necessity to place a tie with a short sleeved shirt ..

He could carry a tie with him in a small carrying case and leave in the car !! If all are in ties, he can run over to the car and get his tie out ..

Paperbackwriter Mon 28-Jul-25 14:00:41

People still wear ties?? Really?

Esmay Mon 28-Jul-25 14:17:25

No tie is fine .
I also think that ties look odd with short sleeved shirts .
Have fun .

Greenfinch Mon 28-Jul-25 14:22:32

We attended a funeral last week with three generations of mourners. The older generation tended to wear ties, the middle one wore open necked shirts with a suit and the older teens again wore ties. ( I think they were wearing their prom suits which was lovely)

Allira Mon 28-Jul-25 14:23:06

Paperbackwriter

People still wear ties?? Really?

Yes.

M0nica Mon 28-Jul-25 14:24:09

You rarely see men wearing a tie these days - at any event - and certainly not with a short sleeved shirt.

Norah Mon 28-Jul-25 14:29:32

Calendargirl A Sunday Lunch for about 60 people, in a local smartish hotel.

I checked with the hostess about the dress code for the men. She said there was no dress code, as such, some might wear a suit, some a jacket and trousers, but really, whatever DH felt comfortable in, especially if it’s a hot day.

My husband would be most comfortable in a suit or at least a jacket and trousers -- because that was mentioned first, not after thought.

Perhaps consider what you will be wearing? When I wear a dress (Church) my husband wears a suit. When I wear jeans he does as well.

Norah Mon 28-Jul-25 14:30:59

Allira

Paperbackwriter

People still wear ties?? Really?

Yes.

Of course men wear ties.

Barbadosbelle Mon 28-Jul-25 14:46:09

.

NEVER a tie with a short sleeved shirt. It's not Australia in the 1950's!

Jackiest Mon 28-Jul-25 15:04:23

People don't normally dress formally any more. Providing it is clean and does not have holes in then wear whatever you feel most comfortable in.

4allweknow Mon 28-Jul-25 15:14:34

Perhaps a lightweight jacket but tie not needed.

JudyBloom Mon 28-Jul-25 15:28:29

I imagine if a tie was necessary it would have been mentioned, but it sounds like it's an informal celebration which corresponds niceley to the middle of August. I think smart casual is a safe option and can be achieved without a tie. Hope all goes well and everyone enjoys themselves.

Ziplok Mon 28-Jul-25 15:38:36

I think the outfit you describe sounds absolutely fine. It’s a wedding anniversary lunch rather than a wedding lunch, so less formality. Go, enjoy and relax knowing that your DH will look very smart.

welbeck Mon 28-Jul-25 16:00:22

Do men wear a jacket while eating?
Isn't that a bit uncomfortable or cumbersome.
Or do they take it off to eat.
Put it on the back of the chair?
In which case why bother wearing it ?
This all seems rather strange to me.
I think I move in different circles.

Calendargirl Mon 18-Aug-25 08:09:16

UPDATE.

The Ruby anniversary lunch was yesterday.

The weather was reasonably warm, but no sun and a bit overcast.

DH wore the SS shirt, (no tie!) and very nice he looked to.

Several others were dressed similarly, a few in suits and some with jackets.

We had a really lovely time. Why had I fretted about it? 🤷‍♀️

Thanks for all advice

NotSpaghetti Mon 18-Aug-25 09:29:52

You fretted because you wanted to be comfortable there (and your husband too).
And you were.. and had a jolly time.
Thanks for coming back to update us, Calendargirl.

HelterSkelter1 Tue 19-Aug-25 06:12:40

I love an update. It answers all the questions.