My mum is in her 80’s - on her own now a few years. She still drives, has friends and does a few clubs etc through the week, meets people for coffee and lunch and keeps busy - she has one or two health issues but nothing I would call life limiting - her mobility is not what it was but she still walks a bit . There are 3 AC including me, 2 live nearish and one about an hour away. We are a typical in our 50’s with teenage children family. I work flexibly and have my own timetable but a busy life , my sister in a full time job and other sibling semi retired. I am finding my mum trickier to spend time with - she moans a LOT about everything, money, never seeing her children, never seeing her grandchildren (she has known all of them and they all keep in touch and she has seen them a lot over their younger lives). I usually speak to her once a week, see her on average 3-4 times a month either a coffee/lunch or a pop in depending on what is going on for me and family. My sibling an hour away is slightly more distant and makes less effort. My sister sees her more but they live slightly closer and she has looked after her kids a lot (her kids are a bit younger) - I find my energy to see her increasingly harder to muster - I am tired, my immediate family are draining and it’s now like having another child to deal with although my own teenagers seem more aware of their emotions these days. When I tell her what I am up to she is resentful in her comments - they are loaded with a ‘it’s alright for you’ tone. She had a very good life before my father died and we do what we can. Help !!!!!
Should I have been a better person?
