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Holiday Dilemma - what would you do/

(26 Posts)
Youngerthanspringtime Sat 02-May-26 21:14:57

A friend and I have booked a holiday abroad in the upcoming weeks.
However her health has deteriorated quite a bit in the last few weeks.
She does not know if she is up to going or not.
There is no possibility of anyone taking her place and going instead. She has said that she wants to reimburse me the cost of the holiday if she doesn't go but that doesn't sit well with me though she insists the money is not problem.
I don't really want to go on my own, although in the past I have gone abroad on my own, but that was a number of years ago. not sure I'm up to that now.
What would YOU do in that situation.

Gran22boys Sat 02-May-26 21:23:05

I wouldn’t go and would just forget about the money. But wouldn’t your friend’s insurance cover her? That way, she could give you half the money perhaps.

Cossy Sat 02-May-26 21:28:36

What a horrid problem, personally, I’d probably be tempted to alone.

I wish you and friend well flowers

Silvershadow Sat 02-May-26 21:33:23

I suppose it hinges on the type of holiday. If it were with Saga, a coach trip or similar there will be others on their own to pal up with if you wanted to. My friend goes on walking holidays with HF by herself but always finds a fellow traveller to chat to.

Tenko Sat 02-May-26 21:39:24

Could you find someone to go with you and do a name change?
Do you have a group insurance? If so , if she cancels , you can claim as well . If you have individual insurance, you’re not covered if you don’t want to go . It’s called disinclination to travel .
Plus your friends insurance may not pay unless she has medical documentation to say she can’t travel .
I’d go but I don’t know your age or the sort of holiday you’ve booked .

BlueBelle Sat 02-May-26 21:56:26

If I was younger than I am ( you might be) I d go alone, now in my eighties I think I d miss it

MissChateline Sat 02-May-26 22:08:08

I would go on my own and enjoy the holiday.

Youngerthanspringtime Sat 02-May-26 22:16:09

I don't know if my friends insurance would cover her at the moment.
Its not a tour or group holiday just the two of us on a package.
As I said, in the past I've gone alone, but now a few years down the line I'm not too keen.
I would feel bad about taking the money, don't think I can do that. and no there is no one available to take her place.
If I do go I would probably spend most of the time sitting by the pool reading with maybe a few short walks . I don't have a lot of stamina for much else.

MT62 Sat 02-May-26 22:19:50

That’s unfortunate. Can you say where you are going?
I ask because of the current climate of being stuck somewhere if anything was to happen with this situation with Iran.
If it’s Spain, Italy, somewhere like that I would maybe go on my own, if it was a cruise, or coach holiday.
I hope you get sorted.

Sarnia Sat 02-May-26 22:46:30

I have had to back out of a family cruise to Norway next April due to my health. I let them know in good time so my deposit was refunded. I'm sure it hasn't been an easy decision for her and perhaps, like me, your friend doesn't want to spoil the holiday for others. It's a shame there is no one to take her place so that you could still go. What type of holiday have you booked? You may be fine if you part of a group like a coach tour. If you can afford to lose the money then that may be the easiest way to sort that out. I hope you find a solution that goes some way in suiting you both.

MissAdventure Sat 02-May-26 23:04:26

You could take the money and take your friend out for days, or lunches when she's well enough.

TheSunRisesInTheEast Sun 03-May-26 03:34:15

Youngerthanspringtime, it's disappointing for you that your friend is unable to join you on holiday, I expect you were really looking forward to going and if I were you I'd go on my own.

Spending time sitting round the pool, reading, with the occasional dip to cool down and chat to people in the pool, would be a joy. Taking short walks, sitting outside a cafe with coffee and cake, bliss.

If you feel confident enough to go on your own, and you don't have mobility issues to hold you back, go! You'll have your meals cooked for you, no prep or washing up. Bed made, bathroom cleaned and towels replaced, evening entertainment or relax on your balcony, tea making facilities usually provided, safe and secure environment, people watching or chatting with guests.

Have a fabulous time ☀️ 🏖️ 🍷.

vegansrock Sun 03-May-26 05:27:50

If its a nice hotel in a lovely location Id go. Sitting by the pool with a book, having nice meals and no housework - sounds great!

Whiff Sun 03-May-26 06:57:15

Surely when you both took out travel insurance you had the sort if you had to cancel you got a full refund?

I can only holiday in GB . I stay at Premier Inn or Travelodge because they have accessible rooms for walking and wheelchair disabled. I always pay the Flexi rate which is more expensive than standard but it means that I can cancel up to 1pm on the day of arrival and get a full refund . I always have the meal deal and early check in as well at Premier Inn because I am travelling on my own . At the Travelodge have Flexi room booking and early check in . But I stay there when I visit my brother and sister in law and have all my meals with them .

I always go on holiday by myself going on 4 this year just Monday to Friday via train with travel assistance. Lancaster,Sleaford Travelodge which couple of villages from my family ,Lewes and Dundee.

NotSpaghetti Sun 03-May-26 07:04:17

I would let her cancel and if she does pay you back you can then (I hope) plan for something once she's well.

If you can afford to cancel I would tell her to keep the money - but by accepting it you may assuage her guilty feelings.

NotAGran55 Sun 03-May-26 07:15:20

In your position I would be brave and go on my own, but if you really don’t think you can, then there’s no choice but to cancel which is a pity.
I wouldn’t want to take the money from my friend though, but I understand her wanting to reimburse you.

Is there any possibility of the company agreeing to rearrange the date for you, perhaps with an extra charge?

BlueBelle Sun 03-May-26 07:20:38

It really depends how old you are, how fit you are and how confident you are.
I ve holidayed alone and enjoyed it and sitting round the pool in warm weather or walking to a nearby beach sounds very appealing

NotSpaghetti Sun 03-May-26 07:48:41

Is there any possibility of the company agreeing to rearrange the date for you, perhaps with an extra charge?

Good idea if you feel you may both enjoy this in future

Youngerthanspringtime Sun 03-May-26 08:28:57

I've been away several times on my own abroad but I'm older now and not sure I want to do it again.
Obviously I wouldn't get my money back if I don't go. I'm not sure what her insurance covers her for,
The thing is about the money. 2 years ago I organised a trip to Italy on my own. I covered every detail and booked the flight the transfer and the accommodation all separately.
Owing to incompetence on the part of a well known budget airline with an Irish name I got off the plane before it took off (long story} and the only amount I was able to recuperate was the transfer back to airport in Italy. I tried for months to claim money back from the airline but gave up after several months, so I was about £800 out of pocket,
I am still hoping my friend will decide to go after all so it will probably be a last minute decision - just don't want to make the wrong one.

MT62 Sun 03-May-26 09:16:57

Youngerthanspringtime

I've been away several times on my own abroad but I'm older now and not sure I want to do it again.
Obviously I wouldn't get my money back if I don't go. I'm not sure what her insurance covers her for,
The thing is about the money. 2 years ago I organised a trip to Italy on my own. I covered every detail and booked the flight the transfer and the accommodation all separately.
Owing to incompetence on the part of a well known budget airline with an Irish name I got off the plane before it took off (long story} and the only amount I was able to recuperate was the transfer back to airport in Italy. I tried for months to claim money back from the airline but gave up after several months, so I was about £800 out of pocket,
I am still hoping my friend will decide to go after all so it will probably be a last minute decision - just don't want to make the wrong one.

🙏she changes her mind, that you get to go.
If it’s Eu you will have your health card, won’t you?
It depends on what health issues she has, that she has told her insurance.
I think if she has insurance from last year & it’s a new health issue, I think she will still be covered. Still better to check.

My two cousins were going on a month long cruise to South Africa, in two weeks time, one of them has fractured her back, I think the other cousin’s insurance won’t cover her cancellation.
So now the cousin that is fit is taking a friend (friend has been given this holiday) just paying for name change £800 😩

Youngerthanspringtime Sun 03-May-26 09:26:06

Thanks MT62, yes we have our Global health cards.
Thanks all for suggestions and good wishes.
There is no one I know who is in a position to take my friend's place so as I said it's going to be a last minute decision.

barmcake Sun 03-May-26 09:34:42

I would go on my own. It's surprising how many people now holiday solo. Take some good books and read up on the best places to go.

Very sad for your friend but I'm sure she would feel better if you went and enjoyed the holiday.

NotSpaghetti Sun 03-May-26 11:28:37

I would be happy travelling solo but know I'd make different choices to those I would make travelling with someone.

I wouldn't go if the holiday wouldn't suit *me*.
If it would, then fair enough.

butterandjam Sun 03-May-26 11:45:18

I'd go on my own and take a few books. If you're not very mobile here are sure to be some organised local tours that pick up from hotels and bring you back after in a minibus or taxi. Or cheap taxis around town to any local summer events/festivals/ concerts etc. Sit in the local park with an ice cream and a book. bliss.

MT62 Sun 03-May-26 13:23:50

Hopefully whatever you decide I hope it all works out for you, (both) 🙏