Please help me stay calm

A hand hold from me

LaCrep sorry to read you are so worried about your DD.

I've had a big lump in my throat for the past 20yrs. Had a bio, but the doc messed up, didn't give me any anesthetic, so I screamed when he stuck the massive bio needle in my neck, I told him to carry on and big quick. I was told I needed a second bio, I didn't go. Still here, so not cancer. We all get these lumps and bumps, lots of them are benign and nothing to worry about. Fingers crossed your DD is the same as me. xx

Isn’t it nice that we are all holding hands I can just imagine a big circle of grans holding hands and praying for a good outcome
We have our ups and downs on here, but it’s still good that there are lots of caring people around when we need them x

Honestly, I know it’s easy to say but try not to worry. Worrying won’t make anything better and you will stress yourself out.
Your daughter sounds very sensible.

In the last 18 months my husband has had two life changing Strokes and is now disabled and my son has had 10 hr surgery and 6 months chemo for Pancreatic cancer and I have been fast tracked twice to the breast clinic.
In one day I dropped my son off for his chemo which lasts about 5 hours. I then took my husband to his Stroke appointment then went for my scan and consultation at the breast clinic all at the same hospital! I actually didn’t even have time to worry about anything. I was just pleased that I managed to jiggle all the appointments around so we didn’t have to make 3 x 60 mile round trips. Take care and stay positive.

Oh LaCrepescule, I’m adding my hand to the many already reaching out to you. 💐

I think it's very understandable, must be the waiting and the fact that your mind has so much empty space to fill with frightening possibilities. But at this moment, you simply don’t know what the lump is. It is being investigated, and that is exactly what needs to happen.

Your daughter sounds wonderfully grounded, and I think there’s something to be said for following her lead and trying to take things one step at a time, rather than living through all the possible outcomes before you have any answers.

The fact that the specialist nurse was reassuring must surely be something you can hold onto too.

When your thoughts start running away with you, perhaps try bringing yourself back to what you actually know today: she is here, she is carrying on with her life, she has her scan booked, and you don't have the answer yet.

I hope the scan brings you both some reassuring news, and in the meantime, please be gentle with yourself. You don't have to hold everything together every minute. Sending you a very big handhold. 🤗💐

Please don't overthink this , difficult as it is . GPs have a duty to refer under the 2 week pathway , it's not because they think its cancer but to rule it out and thank goodness they do . I've been referred 3 times over the last 30 years for 3 different things and all turned out well .
The anxiety over this is real but just take deep breaths . Your daughter is in good hands and you're worrying before you've been given any results .
I hope this helps to reassure . Let us know what the outcome is , praying for you and your daughter that all will be well 🙏

My husband got referred for a mole they did it quickly. He had to have it taken off all is well. They are very quick to achieve a result in any lumps or swollen areas. It’s so things get sorted quickly. My hand is out for you holding you in my thoughts.🙏

madeleine, such good advice. Use up the adrenaline and try to keep busy. 💐

Good wishes to you, LaCrepescule.
✨️ 🤚 🙏 ✨️

A hand hold and a hug from me x

Hope DD doesn’t have to wait too long for results

My hand is always here for you to hold. Hugs. 🤗

It is hard when your DD is wanting to deal with it in her own way but you are left having to bite your tongue and carry your worriesalone.
It is good that you have come on here where handholds will come your way thick and fast including from me.

Of course it’s OK to be frightened!
You must be proud of the way your daughter is handling this.
I can see why you don’t want neighbours asking questions every five minutes.
Keep going 🤝🌷

What an awful time this must be for you. A handhold from me and wishing your daughter all the very best.

It is the inactivity that makes it worse I find. Have had cancer twice - still here as you see - but even bad news for me was better than the awful tension that you could do little about. So can I suggest that you try and do some physical exercise, Whether it is a walk or a swim or anything you enjoy doing. When your shoulders feel so tense and you cant release them or just find that you are sitting in a chair , yet not relaxed, having a walk round the garden to to meet a friend for coffee can help. You cannot relieve the stress until you have further news but trying to be kind to yourself, talking to old friends who know you very well can all just help in some small way. We are all here and many of us are not great sleepers, so if you wake up worrying then we are always around to talk to. Wishing her good news, and that you have someone close by , who can be your support

Hoping and praying that the news is good .

Thinking of you and hope your daughter finds out soon and it is non cancerous - if it has been there for a long time you wouldn’t think so . 💐

LaCrepescule so pleased you are still in recovery.
Be brave.
Don't let this scary thing knock you off your path.
Can you get support from AA ? I'm sure you can...
We are all hoping for the very best outcome for your precious daughter.

Another thing, if it’s a long-standing lump, I doubt it’s anything sinister x

My daughter had similar - a lump on her neck. We went through an anxious couple of weeks - she was operated on within a few days. Thank Heaven , it was a non-cancerous cyst on her thyroid gland.
We’ve had a few anxious times, with lumps - with various members of the family. But, all turned out ok.
So , don’t worry too much - worst case scenario, treatment these days has advanced so much. Your precious daughter will be fine. Thinking of you all

It's always so hard not knowing and waiting for the answer. Maybe easier said than done but try to remember that usually they are being cautious and everything is just fine.

Every best wish for your daughter. 💐
I hope the wait isn't too long and that she gets reassuring news.

A difficult time for you. My daughter had breast cancer in early 2019, so I can empathise with you. MacMillan were a great source of help and support. Your friends will be there for you and will not find it boring. All best wishes to you and your daughter. ♥️💐

I would feel just the same. Sending you my best wishes

Hand hold and hugs here. I hope all turns out well. 🤞💐

Bless you all. I’m going to try and get some sleep and face tomorrow with acceptance. It’s ok to be frightened and I can lean into my friends. I’m a recovering alcoholic in AA and so grateful to be sober.