Grizelda, I am no stranger to grieving, and I know that for a long time after you lose anyone your mind and emotions go in all directions. Some days you go through just about every emotion known to man and for an hour or two you could rule the world, then in another hour or two you are gibbering wreck. Go with the flow, don't be hard on yourself. You were just getting your head around being widowed and your precious dog died - how would anyone feel? You are focusing on your dog at the moment but it will change, you will start to miss your husband more and then it will change again. Losing people close to you really messes with your mind, I lost my Dad and my husband within 6 months of each other and I flitted from missing one more than the other. It dosn't matter if you are grieving for your dog - it's still a loss and as any animal lover knows, your pet is part of your family. You will have ups and downs and have emotions you didn;t know you possessed. It's all part of grieving. My heart goes out to you, but you will settle eventually and things will be more in prospective. Sending strength.